b52s Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 I'm more of a proponent of when it's not over until the fat lady sings...but ever notice with some engaged couples , they start referring to themselves not as fiance's but actually use the terms "husband" or "Wife" when talking about each other. I think it's typically, esp. when the wedding date isn't firm. Heck, I know of one woman that has changed her maiden name to her future husband's last name already on her MySpace acct. Then, knowing how engagments sometimes don't last anyways, isn't that like putting the cart before the horse?
bluewolf17 Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 Uh, I have this "friend" of Facebook that already changed her last name to her boyfriends, and stated that she is engaged. She isn't, and after 3 years he still hasn't asked..strange. I don't see a lot of what you are talking about, but I would find it annoying.
Pizzaman81 Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 Uh, I have this "friend" of Facebook that already changed her last name to her boyfriends, and stated that she is engaged. She isn't, and after 3 years he still hasn't asked..strange. I don't see a lot of what you are talking about, but I would find it annoying. Optomistic!
Yukikazi Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 Optomistic! More like creepy... This would make me rethink the relationship
Angel1111 Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 If one of them is rich and dies, the other will see how 'married' they are when they don't get a dime. Or if they break up and there's no attorney or divorce court. Big clues that ya ain't married.
Stung Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 I haven't really seen any of this behavior...maybe it's regional, or something? Before we were married, I did occasionally refer to my partner as my husband, but only when I was dealing with our mutual finances/insurance or our realtors, because it greased the wheels for getting things done; we had joint bank accounts and were on the same health insurance already, but some office personnel wouldn't effect policy changes without making both of us take time off work to talk to them, unless they thought we were married. In general out in the world though I referred to him as my partner, or my fiance. I looked forward to our wedding so I could name him my husband for real.
laRubiaBonita Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 Optomistic! i agree..... Uh, I have this "friend" of Facebook that already changed her last name to her boyfriends, and stated that she is engaged. She isn't, and after 3 years he still hasn't asked..strange. ... except in ^^^^ those cases... that's just dumb, but it's just MHO.
Author b52s Posted December 9, 2009 Author Posted December 9, 2009 Uh, I have this "friend" of Facebook that already changed her last name to her boyfriends, and stated that she is engaged. She isn't, and after 3 years he still hasn't asked..strange. I don't see a lot of what you are talking about, but I would find it annoying. Yeah, I actually had worked with customers that would refer to thier "live in" fiance's (or supposed fiance's) as wife or husband...its wierd.
bean1 Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 Meh, I sometimes refer to my boyfriend (not fiance) as my husband (we live together, have a child together). No, not married, but with a house purchase and a newborn coming in 6 months, an engagement ring or wedding isn't exactly on the list financially! It's just a habit, it doesn't really mean anything.
Malenfant Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 with me it was quite the opposite! we got married in August and i still catch myself calling my H my BF. Calling him my husband sounds funny... nice, but odd. i think it makes us sound old! lol. but i like it very much.
laRubiaBonita Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 with me it was quite the opposite! we got married in August and i still catch myself calling my H my BF. Calling him my husband sounds funny... nice, but odd. i think it makes us sound old! lol. but i like it very much. i felt that way too! especially after we got engaged... i never really called him my fiance, just my boyfriend... and now that we are married... i will talk with my younger coworkers abd say "my husband"... of course they look at me and say aren't you too young to be married- then i tell them i am 30 and i blow them away with how "old" i am
sb129 Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 I still haven't changed my name on many things, including my FB page, and have been married nearly a year. My brothers GF calls him her "husband" but they aren't married. I think its weird, and smacks of insecurity on her part. She is a bit unstable at times.
TheWooWooKid Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 If one of them is rich and dies, the other will see how 'married' they are when they don't get a dime. Or if they break up and there's no attorney or divorce court. Big clues that ya ain't married. Some states recognize common-law marriage.
sally4sara Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 I think for some couples, the license is just a physical aspect of the relationship they are already living and an attitude towards each other they already feel. Occasionally, my fiance will call me his wife. A couple of times, close friends have stopped by and wonder where my husband is at when he wasn't there at the time. I can't speak for everyone's situation, but I just figure this happens because it is obvious the him and others that we hold that importance for each other.
Author b52s Posted December 9, 2009 Author Posted December 9, 2009 I think for some couples, the license is just a physical aspect of the relationship they are already living and an attitude towards each other they already feel. Occasionally, my fiance will call me his wife. A couple of times, close friends have stopped by and wonder where my husband is at when he wasn't there at the time. I can't speak for everyone's situation, but I just figure this happens because it is obvious the him and others that we hold that importance for each other. Or possibly a false sense of security?
sally4sara Posted December 9, 2009 Posted December 9, 2009 Or possibly a false sense of security? Like I said, I can't really speak on the circumstances of others. I can only speak on the few times I have noticed it in my own relationship. It wasn't due to insecurities, rather just being cute and already feeling that what happens in 5 weeks is already the way we live.
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