Kristie16 Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 This isn't me, but it's a situation that intrigues me because it involves two acquaintances of mine. He's 38, very charming, smart, high power job and a big flirt. She's 25, smart, cute. They've dated for five years. They started dating when she was a junior in college and he was in his early 30s. He was her first bf, while he hadn't had a serious gf for quite some time before her. They did long distance for two years before she moved back home to live with her parents, while still seeing him. She finally gave him an ultimatum about a year ago, the relationship had to progress. At that point he asked her to move with him (he was moving for a job) and to live with him. She left her family to move thousands of miles a way to be with him and doesnt work (he makes lots of money, but the field in which she got a degree in doesnt have any jobs where they live, so she stays at home). WHen I speak with her she says they're engaged or pre-engaged or sometimes even says they're married. To him, however, they are just boyfriend and girlfriend. I know she pushes for marriage a lot and I believe they even got their marriage certificate several months ago, but I guess it never happened. When I ask her about the marriage, she says "they're definitely not in a hurry." I no longer live in the same place as them, but when I did I sometimes hung out with them and he was always checking out other girls out and even flirted with me quite a bit. (at one point I even said something to him about checking out other girls when he had just asked me a question and wasn't making eye contact with me) Yet, he remains with her. I dont know a lot about their relationship behind closed doors, but it always made me wonder why a mid 30 year old who has traveled the globe and lived a very adventurous life would go after a girl in college? And then proceed to stay with her for years, but not marry or have kids as she wants to do and continue to be a major flirt? I've never encountered a couple like them and can't really figure them out.
SoulSearch_CO Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 He sounds immature and unwilling to commit. She sounds like she must really be in love with him, wants a commitment, but is afraid to "rock the boat" by pushing him into marriage. He looks like a dead-end to me. Either he'll marry her because he realizes he's losing his mojo and can't get other female attention anymore, or she'll have to leave rather than spend her life waiting around for Heff to make a commitment.
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