LonelyGuy85 Posted December 6, 2009 Posted December 6, 2009 Since i started my job i became close to one girl in particular and we got on really well. We have even done things outside of work a few times. She's told me a lot about herself and even some personal things, so i naturally thought that she liked me at least as a friend, enough to trust me with some personal insights into her life. At first i saw her as just an interesting person and wasn't attracted to her, but the more i got to know her, the more attracted i became, but ultimately she was just great to be around. However, a few weeks back we had been moved onto different teams within the company, but worse still we also working different shift patterns, so i never saw her that much. We managed to stay in contact though through office e-mail and txting each other. At first it was ok, don't get me wrong, i really wanted to be by her again, but we sent each other over a dozen e-mails a day. So it was ok. It's now reached the point though where if i send her an email she might not reply for hours upon hours, and even then it's usually a few words and quite abrupt. Clearly not interested in wanting to 'talk'. I know she can reply though, as we do the same job and i can even see her from across the office. Even in points where i know she has no work, she still doesn't send me any messages. Then last week i saw that she was really friendly with another guy on the her team. Which is great, i mean office friendships help get you through the day and if sometimes a great office friendship can develop into a genuine frendship then it's even better. The problem is that i can't help feel that rather than try and be friends with me despite being on different teams, she has 'replaced' me. The truth is that i don't have many (if any) friends and as i had so much in common with her i was hoping that we could at least be friends, but the connection between us as i kind of died out, where it just doesn't seem she is that bothered about staying friends with me. Since we have moved teams i haven't seen her once outside work. Could this mean that this friendship is over?
Pizzaman81 Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Why don't you schedule time with her to hang out outside of work? are you waiting for her to initiate?
Author LonelyGuy85 Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 You hit the nail on the head. Maybe i shouldn't be waiting for her to initiate something, maybe i should try and see if wants to do something outside work. At the moment though i am afraid that if i suddenly start asking if she wants to do things, that she might take it as me asking her out, which would be great if she said yes, but at the same time i just want it to be like before where we would laugh and talk, and it was just good to be around her. I also just realised maybe it's because i would have to put myself out there. She could say no and then it would shake my confidence again, just from me asking someone if they wanted to go to the movies or something. I need to sort my self esteem issues out!
Pizzaman81 Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 ...that she might take it as me asking her out... That's RIGHT! You are asking her out! What's wrong? Is it forbidden? She should be smart enough to know that you're asking her out. It's a normal process.
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