mushmush Posted December 6, 2009 Posted December 6, 2009 Angry, need to vent, confused dont know what to do or think.. i definatly can't talk to my friends and family about this as it will be a perminate black mark on her name and I do know i should kick her ass to the curb. I've just gotten home from without a doubt the best date i've ever been on. Only problem is she was wearing a ring because her rebound guy has just proposed to her in between when she asked me out and we met on our "date". Bit of history, we went out on a couple of date's a few months ago but didnt want to be a rebound, so gave her the space and time she needed to sort her stuff out, move out of her ex's and be single. She has been seeing a guy and he proposed to her after only going out for 3 months. wtf! Is it just me who can see how insecure this guy is? She has not officially said yes (according to her) and describes him as crazy for proposing to her and is not into the idea at all. Talking to her she looked like she was extremly upset about the whole situation. Completly shocked that he proposed at all because she didnt think they where that serious. The most annoying thing is we just click on sooo many differnt levels. She knows it, I know it. Was she just going out with me to see if the spark was still there? She landed a HUGE kiss twice on my lips at the end of the night, so who knows she must(?) have thought the night was great as well. Is she just as confused as I am? She goes home to slovakia for two weeks for christmas and wants to see me when she gets back. I want to, but I know I cant. Yes i'm rambling a bit but ffs i'm just totally numb at the moment. I want to crawl into a hole and just give up. I've done everything right over the last 3 months. I have not been a doormat, i've been cordially distant. I know I should go completly NC on her for ****ing me around (and I'm going to do my best to) but no matter how many girls I go out with or have been out with I just dont have the same connection like I do with this girl. In my eyes it is just so rare you can go out with someone and be feel completly comfortable with being yourself, warts and all and have them respond to you in exactly the same way.. Tell me, I can't persue her. Tell me I cant have anything to do with her while she has anything to do with this guy. Tell me i need to move on with my life. I can honestly say I've just never felt so dead inside. That love does not exist, that no matter what I do in this life I'm just bound to end up settling for second best. Now, I ask and i know it's crazy but if I want her in my life what can I do?? I know I can't just be friends with her. I really only have 1 option, dont I? cut her from my life and if she wants to have anything to do with me she has to persue me on my terms..
boogieboy Posted December 6, 2009 Posted December 6, 2009 You gave her 3 months to sort her shyte out, and she couldnt be alone while she did it. Thats bad news right there. She will never do things on your terms, so you will have to let her go and start over with someone new. Let her be with ring guy. YOu will find someone you click with just be patient. You cant build up a girl too much that you know isnt going to work.
Author mushmush Posted December 6, 2009 Author Posted December 6, 2009 gave her 2 weeks after she had moved out of her ex's and then asked her out.. She asked me out the week after that. ****ing stupid, and yes i'm pissed as she always said the only reason we were not together was because of bad timing and just lead me on.. Yeah it is bad news that she couldnt even wait to get out of her ex's before starting a new relationship. We had a talk about how messy thing would be and we should start things at the right time. Then she goes ahead and gets into a new relationship anyway and proceeds to tell me tonight how messy everything was at the beginning. Everything screams to me that this chick is just an attention whore. I've completly lost patience i'm 31 and all i find are mental patients and game players. I wish I didnt have feeling for her but they are more turning to anger now as I know she just dicked me around.
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 involved with her for 3-4 months in what ever way shape or form and she turns up on a date wearing an engagement ring.. I just do not know any more.
J dub Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 obviously she said yes or she wouldnt be wearing a ring. How would that make YOU feel, knowing your fiance is out telling the world how she is not sure of her "yes" decision? wtf.
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 How would her fiance feel knowing she was out on a date with a guy she once told that "I think I love you" on the monday after he proposed and she was the one asking me out. wtf! and wants to go out on another date with me when she gets back home from visiting family for christmas. wwwwtf! she straight up told me she told this guy he was crazy for proposing to her didnt say yes, nothing is official but just took the ring anyway. It was so obvious to me she was upset about the mess she had gotten herself into. The whole situation does not sit well with her. I can se him saying to her "just take the ring anyway and think about it". I feel sorry for this poor chump.
boogieboy Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 How would her fiance feel knowing she was out on a date with a guy she once told that "I think I love you" on the monday after he proposed and she was the one asking me out. wtf! and wants to go out on another date with me when she gets back home from visiting family for christmas. wwwwtf! she straight up told me she told this guy he was crazy for proposing to her didnt say yes, nothing is official but just took the ring anyway. It was so obvious to me she was upset about the mess she had gotten herself into. The whole situation does not sit well with her. I can se him saying to her "just take the ring anyway and think about it". I feel sorry for this poor chump. I dont think so. Do you think you would still hang with her if she said that she accepted the engagement? Hell no! She knows this, and will tell you anything she can to get you to give her attention. She can only do that if YOU let her. Dont let her get away with it. Ditch her forever.
InspiredbyYou Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Yeah three months is coo-coo. He does sound insecure, but she sounds even more insecure for not slowing things down and accepting. But who cares about that, even worse than that is what is she doing going out on a date with you!?!? WTF!?!?
J dub Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 You feel sorry for that poor chump? How do you think she looks at YOU in this situation? She's more than likely like "wow what a dope, I have a ring on my finger and this idiot is still giving me attention like its his job" AHEM.
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 I dont think so. Do you think you would still hang with her if she said that she accepted the engagement? Hell no! She knows this, and will tell you anything she can to get you to give her attention. She can only do that if YOU let her. Dont let her get away with it. Ditch her forever. totally agree mate.. Allready deleted her from my life
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 You feel sorry for that poor chump? How do you think she looks at YOU in this situation? She's more than likely like "wow what a dope, I have a ring on my finger and this idiot is still giving me attention like its his job" AHEM. You know what, if I knew she was engaged I would never have gone out with her. Yes I also know i'm a dope for not walking out as soon as I found out she was engaged.
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 Yeah three months is coo-coo. He does sound insecure, but she sounds even more insecure for not slowing things down and accepting. But who cares about that, even worse than that is what is she doing going out on a date with you!?!? WTF!?!? Then asking me out on another date. WTF! running as fast as I can
J dub Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Good boy. Couldn't be a better decision. And now she's going to play the "wait, I thought we were getting to know each other?" mind-games. Tell her, ditch the dude and the ring, and then you'll talk. They either get 100% or NONE - not this 1/2 and 1/2 bull.****.
InspiredbyYou Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Good boy. Couldn't be a better decision. And now she's going to play the "wait, I thought we were getting to know each other?" mind-games. Tell her, ditch the dude and the ring, and then you'll talk. They either get 100% or NONE - not this 1/2 and 1/2 bull.****. Well stated! Mushmush let her flaky fiance handle her baggage, she has huge insecurity and emotional issues. You don't need that kind of crap.
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 It's always so much harder to do when you are in a situation like this yourself. I can hear the advice right now I would be giving someone else. I know exactly what I have to do but just have to follow through with it. I've always been the type of guy who says "it's all or nothing" and I never play games. As much as i like this girl (and it's 95% there) why would I want to be with someone with so much drama attached to them and who treats people with such dis-respect?? I gave her an opportunity to sort her drama and syte out and start a mature drama free relationship and she made the choice to jump out of the frying pan and into the fire. This is one time I have to listen to my head and not my heart (or penis) lol.
InspiredbyYou Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Yeah man you are thinking with your penis. You can't possibly want anything serious with a woman who just got engaged to a dude after three months of knowing him that in itself is insane and says a lot about her AND who is also making dates with you. Think about it rationally. What kind of a person does that? The kind of person who is so starved for attention they have 0 regard for anyone other than themselves. So you win her over and she dumps the fiance and ends up with you, then what happens if another Mushmush down the road crosses her path, you will be in the role of the fiance and she will be doing this to you. I mean it's not even like this is the love of your life and she is having a momentary bout of insanity, this is just some chick you barely even know.
J dub Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 then what happens if another Mushmush down the road crosses her path, you will be in the role of the fiance and she will be doing this to you. Hilarious! and so true. SO true.
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 I've actually known her for a 1 and 1/2 years almost 2 years. gotten to know her alot better over the last 4 months. So much so, that my rational part of the brain IS kicking in and I know that I could never have a serious relationship with this girl. Seeing how things are at the moment, I could never trust her and i have lost so much respect for her. Another mushmush is never going to enter her life as i know i'm too good for her and deserve better. Thanks ladies, apprieciate your comments and advice. also cheer's boogieboy
InspiredbyYou Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Oh ok I so you've known her for a bit, still though you must focus on what she is doing now. I bet you didn't know she was capable of accepting an engagement ring and seeing you at the same time? Have you asked her why she came to see you on the date if she was engaged?!?! Sorry I didn't mean another just like you, I meant another guy in your situation now. ;-) J dub you have the most beautiful hair!! Sorry mushmush I had to comment...I like your name it's funny and fun to type out hahhaha!
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 lol I know what you meant. I was just commenting that I think i'm pretty special and does she not deserve having someone like me in her life.. Yup, didnt think she was capable of accepting an engagement ring and seeing me at the same time. I never asked her why she still came out on our date after accepting the ring, but it would be interesting to know. I was more interested as to know why she started dating someone else when we had the exact conversation of why it would be a bad idea when she was still living with her ex. I think she said, she was just spineless and went along with things??? That it was just good company and made her feel better..... J dub does have great hair btw hehe
CeeL Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 OP, you mentioned her going back to Slovakia for holidays. I don't know if you're in the USA, but if so, I wonder if this is a "latch onto a green card" scenario? That is, she gets married, however dubiously, and gets permanent residency. That's a huge incentive for some people, anyhow, and has led to some very weird circumstances.
J dub Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 I wonder if this is a "latch onto a green card" scenario? That is, she gets married, however dubiously, and gets permanent residency. INTERESTING.... also, off topic: thanks for the compliments that is too sweet. I'd trade my hair for your...erm...assets...any day though. LOL - grass is always greener, eh?
InspiredbyYou Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Wow Mushmush I can't believe you didn't ask her that? It blows my mind. I would be all over that if someone did that to me. What the hell are you doing here if you just got engaged!?!? INTERESTING.... also, off topic: thanks for the compliments that is too sweet. I'd trade my hair for your...erm...assets...any day though. LOL - grass is always greener, eh? In a heartbeat dub!!
Author mushmush Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 OP, you mentioned her going back to Slovakia for holidays. I don't know if you're in the USA, but if so, I wonder if this is a "latch onto a green card" scenario? That is, she gets married, however dubiously, and gets permanent residency. That's a huge incentive for some people, anyhow, and has led to some very weird circumstances. Australian and thought about it.. Just messaged her and asked her "I need an honest answer, why did you still come out on a date with me if you just accepted an engagement ring?" Her response: "It was not a date, we have never been on a date. I offered you friendship and you said ok. sorry if I wasted your time" Me "Bull****. You know it, I know it. Have a nice life" I'm not an idiot, I know what a date is. I also know what was said between us. All I can say is wow, what a stupid self centered bitch.
Recommended Posts