DarkestChapter Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Hey, I just got out of an unbelievably unhealthy and hurtful relationship with a girl I've been going out with for a while... Luckily though, I've made friends with this extremely cute girl in one of my classes in university who I think I have strong feelings for. I'm a guitarist in a death metal band, and all the girls I've gone out with can't stand the genre of music that I play, and rarely see me in my gigs, but this girl is actually beautiful (which is rare for girls in the death metal scene tbh) AND loves the style of music I play. Anyways, yesterday she asked me to help her on one of her assignments, and it was the first time I really felt strongly for her, or feel a spark for any girl for that matter (been in really bad realtionships). So, after about 45 minutes together I told her I had to go because I really did and she thanked me shily. After I left, I was dying to ask her out... but when I got home and checked my school schedule I realised that all the classes I have with her are not giving anymore lectures due to exam times. That's my problem, I only see her during class and next semester she told me that she won't have any classes with me since she's switching program. After, feeling desperate, I went to one of these review sessions in hope of seeing her, but she wasn't there... So, since I never even asked for her number yet, (she only gave me her email) and will likely never see her again, should I be really lame and email her? I don't want to ask her out through the email, I'm thinking of just giving her my number and tell her to call me if she's interested. I also feel like I should say something because the bye I gave her was horrible. She knew that I'd never see her again but I didn't so all I said was "see ya", and left. Please help, and sorry for giving out my life story...
Yukikazi Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 you got her email.. check if she is on facebook with it then friend her.
shadowplay Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Yeah, totally send her an email. It worked for me. If she doesn't respond, you'll never see her again so what do you have to lose?
Author DarkestChapter Posted December 5, 2009 Author Posted December 5, 2009 you got her email.. check if she is on facebook with it then friend her. Hey, thanks for the help, but I probably should have mentioned, I'm a bit of a technophobe. I don't watch tv, don't play video games, don't have facebook, myspace, twitter, or msn... So email is all I've got.
shadowplay Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Hey, thanks for the help, but I probably should have mentioned, I'm a bit of a technophobe. I don't watch tv, don't play video games, don't have facebook, myspace, twitter, or msn... So email is all I've got. Then what are you waiting for?
WTRanger Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Yeah, totally send her an email. It worked for me. If she doesn't respond, you'll never see her again so what do you have to lose? Follow this advice and do it!
Author DarkestChapter Posted December 5, 2009 Author Posted December 5, 2009 I appreciate the advice guys. Yeah, I think I'm going to go for it. You're right that I don't have much to lose, just a bit of my pride in my opinion... Thanks again
billy356 Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Actually if you are comfortable with the concept I would use the email to make an excuse to see her in person and THEN ask her out. Girls may see being asked out over email as a weak sign and if she is on the fence at all about you that may be enough for her to say "Well he didnt have the balls to ask me out in person..so ..ummm...nah..." Email her and ask her to meet up with you for some innocuous reason, something to do with school, anything. Then when you do meet up, go through the motions of the excuse to meet and at the end ask "Hey, are you hungry, you want to go get something to eat with me?" and "melt" into a date. best of luck!
Author DarkestChapter Posted December 5, 2009 Author Posted December 5, 2009 (edited) Actually if you are comfortable with the concept I would use the email to make an excuse to see her in person and THEN ask her out. Girls may see being asked out over email as a weak sign and if she is on the fence at all about you that may be enough for her to say "Well he didnt have the balls to ask me out in person..so ..ummm...nah..." Email her and ask her to meet up with you for some innocuous reason, something to do with school, anything. Then when you do meet up, go through the motions of the excuse to meet and at the end ask "Hey, are you hungry, you want to go get something to eat with me?" and "melt" into a date. best of luck! I thought about that, but honestly, I can't come up with any excuse to see her again. It's close to the end of the semester and we are finished with all the assignments as well. Also, classes aren't even available anymore, everyone is basically staying home and studying for exams right now. I also thought about asking her to help me study for an exam, but it seems too obvious, especially since my school has free review sessions and tutoring available. Also, I'm not exactly planning to ask her out through email. Although the intention is that, I only plan to say that I'm interested in her and that I want to see her again, and to call me if she's interested by giving her my number. But yeah, I still feel like she'll think I'm unbelievably lame by emailing her, even though I'm really comfortable with her in person, and not shy in the least. I don't know though, there's an insanely high chance that I'll never see her again so I feel like swallowing my pride and going for it without overthinking and analyzing the situation. Thanks again for the help by the way. Edited December 5, 2009 by DarkestChapter
shadowplay Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 I thought about that, but honestly, I can't come up with any excuse to see her again. It's close to the end of the semester and we are finished with all the assignments as well. Also, classes aren't even available anymore, everyone is basically staying home and studying for exams right now. I also thought about asking her to help me study for an exam, but it seems too obvious, especially since my school has free review sessions and tutoring available. Also, I'm not exactly planning to ask her out through email. Although the intention is that, I only plan to say that I'm interested in her and that I want to see her again, and to call me if she's interested by giving her my number. But yeah, I still feel like she'll think I'm unbelievably lame by emailing her, even though I'm really comfortable with her in person, and not shy in the least. I don't know though, there's an insanely high chance that I'll never see her again so I feel like swallowing my pride and going for it without overthinking and analyzing the situation. Thanks again for the help by the way. No, don't do that. As a girl this would turn me off because it sounds insecure. Just be direct ask her out to coffee or something in the email. Don't say if you're interested give me a call.
tkgirl Posted December 6, 2009 Posted December 6, 2009 I thought about that, but honestly, I can't come up with any excuse to see her again. It's close to the end of the semester and we are finished with all the assignments as well. Also, classes aren't even available anymore, everyone is basically staying home and studying for exams right now. I also thought about asking her to help me study for an exam, but it seems too obvious, especially since my school has free review sessions and tutoring available. Also, I'm not exactly planning to ask her out through email. Although the intention is that, I only plan to say that I'm interested in her and that I want to see her again, and to call me if she's interested by giving her my number. But yeah, I still feel like she'll think I'm unbelievably lame by emailing her, even though I'm really comfortable with her in person, and not shy in the least. I don't know though, there's an insanely high chance that I'll never see her again so I feel like swallowing my pride and going for it without overthinking and analyzing the situation. Thanks again for the help by the way. does your band have any gigs coming up? you could email her and ask her to come check out your band... us girls dig that kind of stuff you did say she liked death metal too right? or if there's a show coming up that you could take her to.. make it casual but still date-like, pick her up, maybe get dinner before etc.... keep us posted!
Angel1111 Posted December 6, 2009 Posted December 6, 2009 No, don't do that. As a girl this would turn me off because it sounds insecure. Just be direct ask her out to coffee or something in the email. Don't say if you're interested give me a call. I totally agree. Any guy that asks me to call him will never get that call. Just tell her that all you have is her email address, and say that if it's ok, you'd like to have her phone number.
Author DarkestChapter Posted December 6, 2009 Author Posted December 6, 2009 (edited) does your band have any gigs coming up? you could email her and ask her to come check out your band... us girls dig that kind of stuff you did say she liked death metal too right? or if there's a show coming up that you could take her to.. make it casual but still date-like, pick her up, maybe get dinner before etc.... keep us posted! Yeah, actually we have 3 gigs coming up this month alone. But, I always feel uneasy when I bring a girl I'm dating or that I like to any of my shows. One reason is because the crowd is filled with drunken people, and fights break out every 30 seconds. The other reason is because I ended my relationship with my last girlfriend right after a gig, and my singer's girlfriend broke up with him that same gig haha. And concerning the fact that I was planning to make her call me, yeah I realized that was pretty stupid. If I do go for it I guess I'll be clear and ask for her number and tell her the only reason why I chose to email her was because I have no other way of contacting her. Right now though, I'm quite torn between emailing her, or just hoping that I'll somehow randomly see her at school while I'm writing an exam... I just can't seem to get her out of my head, but emailing her seems to pathetic to even consider trying it. Edited December 6, 2009 by DarkestChapter
Angel1111 Posted December 6, 2009 Posted December 6, 2009 Right now though, I'm quite torn between emailing her, or just hoping that I'll somehow randomly see her at school while I'm writing an exam... I just can't seem to get her out of my head, but emailing her seems to pathetic to even consider trying it. If email is the only way to contact her, then it's not lame. Yeah, you might run into her so you might want to give that some time. But if all else fails, just send her a quick email, like: "Hey, there! I hope you're doing well and getting through the marathon of finals. You know, I hate sending you an email but I never got you phone number and would like to call you sometime. If you're ok with that, please send me your number. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas!" How does that sound?
Author DarkestChapter Posted December 7, 2009 Author Posted December 7, 2009 If email is the only way to contact her, then it's not lame. Yeah, you might run into her so you might want to give that some time. But if all else fails, just send her a quick email, like: "Hey, there! I hope you're doing well and getting through the marathon of finals. You know, I hate sending you an email but I never got you phone number and would like to call you sometime. If you're ok with that, please send me your number. Hope you have a wonderful Christmas!" How does that sound? Actually, that doesn't sound too bad haha. I'll wait till Thursday, since it's the last somewhat possible time I could see her. I'll end up emailing her if I do not end up seeing her till then. I just really hope I do. Thanks for all the help.
Recommended Posts