trippi1432 Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Yeah, yeah....I know I said I was leaving LS, but I also said that one day I would post a thread for Lessons Learned. 1. I deserve to be loved for who I am, I should only have to change if it's my decision. 2. I cannot control how other's treat me, I can only control my reaction to that. 3. Take hold to the things that make you happy, but stay grounded. 4. See people for who they truly are and make wise choices. 5. I am responsible for my own happiness. 6. Relationships should be ones that bring out the best in each other. Any relationship based on anger & retaliation isn't worth the time (most of my marriage). 7. Being positive and optimistic is much better than living with hurt. 8. When you get knocked off your center, take a time out and evaluate. 9. Learn how to trust again, but don't get taken advantage of. 10. Don't dwell on regret, be thankful for every experience life has given you. 11. Life is an adventure, have fun..... ~ Dance like there's no tomorrow, Sing like no one's listening, Love like you have never been hurt, Live every moment to the fullest ~ (yeah, it's sappy, but I love that saying and actually have it in my house.) 12. Be true to myself, give and give back with no regrets. So, in retrospect, a lot of this was "me" before my ex...things I forgot along the way. I had a very good childhood friend who passed away several years ago at the age of 35....he would be happy about this post.
tojaz Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Good for you Trippi! All very true! As for leaving LS, I can think of another that has said that a time or two. In the end, I found out that rather then leaving, I could change what i took from it. This forum is here to serve the needs of the people who make it up, not to define them. What are lessons learned to you are also lessons yet to be taught to someone else. TOJAZ
karnak Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 So, in retrospect, a lot of this was "me" before my ex...things I forgot along the way. I had a very good childhood friend who passed away several years ago at the age of 35....he would be happy about this post. It's amazing how, many times, we become so obsessed with our relationship (and with trying to save it) that, in the end, we simply forget that we're betraying ourselves and everything we built for ourselves throughout most of our life. As you state, a relationship should be about bettering ourselves and others, not pretending we are someone else altogether, just to please or impress the other part.
dgiirl Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Listen to your gut. If you feel something is wrong, chances are high that it is. Things will never get better "in time". If you never address the problem, and work on fixing it, it will only build more resentment and bitterness. Every single person should live alone before they get married. Live alone, pay bills, learn to cook, learn to take care of yourself. So that the fear of being alone never keeps you in an unhealthy relationship. Don't forget your friends because you are in a new relationship. Don't surround your whole life around your partner. You need to have friends and a social life outside of your partner.
PWSX3 Posted December 5, 2009 Posted December 5, 2009 Remember there is your time, his/her time & our time....... Keep your hobbies, it's just a bonus if your spouse likes them to.
FeelingLonely98 Posted December 6, 2009 Posted December 6, 2009 Love yourSELF!! Love you before you cam love someone else. :-)
dazedandconfused2008 Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 Your leaving LS? Will be sad to see you go. Your the only one that really talks to me. Well dont be shy and come back on to say hi sometimes. I wish you the very best in life and its so good to hear about the lessons, if anything, that we learn and experience from...and walk forward with from hard times. Very important indeed....and if i learned anything from all this....its appreciation for life and for family...and for self. Life definitely goes on...doesn't it. Take Care.
Gunny376 Posted December 7, 2009 Posted December 7, 2009 I spoke with my 96 year old Great-grandmother and said, "I'd bet you learn alot about living and people in your 96 years?" To which she replied, "I've learned more about people and living in the last six years than all of the other ninety years combined!" She died in her four room house of sun -stroke hoeing her vegetable garden. Gave birth to seven children. Was never ever in a hospital. Was never in a nursing home!
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