JDB22 Posted December 1, 2009 Posted December 1, 2009 Hi okay, I need some help. This is my story. Its kinda long but please read! I met my boyfriend of seven years when I was a freshman in high school, he was a sophmore and we have dated ever since. It has been amazing, we do so everything together and really were each others first loves. I am in my fourth year of college and we have done the long distance thing all four years (I have transfered so it was anywhere from 6 hours away to 2 hrs away) but saw each other all the time and all summmer each summer. Last may of 08 we decided to rent a little house together and that has been fun, I just go back to school each fall and spring. The dilemma. So for about the past 8 months we were not unhappy, in fact we hadn't even realized anything was wrong until now, but he just wasn't having fun with me anymore and so I was getting snappy occasionally with him being such a downer, don't get me wrong we still do so much cool stuff together but it was like he was just starting to do it to just do it not to have a blast with me! He's very shy and has never showed much how he feels tward me in front of other ppl-no PDA haha Anyways I am really outgoing and fun and love to hang out with a lot of people, I work on a crew of people each summer working outside and at the end of the summer when everyone was leaving to go back to school one of the guys I worked with told me that he really liked me and had a lot of feelings for me. I had not known this and was shocked but listened as I was curious in a way. After that, I went to my college and he went to a college some 7 hours away. My good friend goes to the same college and called me about 2 weeks later and said she had seen the guy and he was really down and all he tlaked about was me. I just kept thinking about him for a while and about a week later out of the blue he called my phone. i didn't know why but I was kinda excited to answer it and thought it to be harmless. We talked for about a half hour about just run of the mill stuff. he called a couple other times but I thought that was harmless. Well me and my other friend had a weekend trip planned to go see my friend at the university where the guy I worked with went too also, I knew there was a chance I'd see him and I did, we hung out with him a couple of the nights. We went to the bars and after on the last night after we were alone he told me again how much he liked me and how he couldnt stop thinking about me..at this point I was so confused and then he kissed me, it wasnt anything long just once and I pulled away. We all said bye and we went home. After that I couldnt stop thinking about what I had done, I have so much with my boyfriend, nothing is wrong in our relationship, we still love each other but he (the guy i worked with) called again after a couple days. I was skeptical about answering but did. We started talking more and more and I felt really guilty about it but he asked me if I could see him, I debated and thought I would, we met halfway in a town between mine and his and I told myself nothing was going to happen but he kissed me again and we went to dinner, very casual. So after that I saw him one other time but never did anything more than a kiss again. So next came Halloween and I went home to go out with my boyfriend and friends, low and behold he came to the same town. We were all at the bars and I was trying to stay away from him but he said he just wanted to talk (and it was obvious that there was something between us) so I went outside to tlalk to him and he kissed me, my boyfriend came out the door and punched him in the face multiple times. the guy I worked with said he didnt want to fight, he knew he was wrong. I ended up running away and hiding for a while behind a building. In the process I had gotten a punch to the eye because my bf didnt pull us apart first. I ended up spending the night at a friends house on the couch and the guy was there as well but nothing happened. So here is the problem, I love my life with my boyfriend, we have a dog and we love our familys and we do things we both love to do, he says he'll change and have fun more often if I just give him a chance too which means stop talking to the other guy. The thing is I think about the other guy so much its not even funny, he calls all the time and makes me laugh and smile. I just want to be a good person, I have always done the right thing in life. all my family wants me to stay with my boyfriend, he is such a good person and is my best friend and I have told him everything and he still wants to stay with me...The thing is, is I don't know if I'm in love with him anymore, I'm not in love with the other guy but I don't feel the same about my boyfriend, I'm sure if I stopped talking to the other guy completely I would fall back into things but I'm not sure what I want. The other guy and I are just like puzzle pieces, we get each other and I think I may have grown away from my boyfriend. I need help. What is the right thing to do?? Was a so wrong? what do you do-Follow your heart, that feeling that is so overwhelming or stick with what you always know will be there and will always love you and you can learn to love them again possibly? Thanks so much, give it to me straight.
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