Boundary Problem Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Believe my trust issues are that serious and I feel I am justified. Every time I hear women on here telling me to give up the hate and bitterness I feel like they are trying to cut my balls off and make me another sucker. I honestly don't even know what hate and bitterness is. But I do know what love is.
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 lol...where do you get this stuff. I have to stop reading your posts or I will not be able to sleep due to E.L. (extreme laughter). First of all, dear heart...(bless your heart)...for a healthy minded individual it's not about who stays married the longest. If the marriage is a mess and the husband is cheating, why would you pride yourself in that??? when the sh*t hits the fan, the cheating husband is going to be the one looking crazy and feeling sad and alone, even with a chic on the side... Truthfully speaking, who WOULD be happy with their S.O. being with someone else? If a married man cheats then he's no prize in any sense of the word. Now if you don't care that your wife (prize) has been wooed by another man then you may favor "swinging" over a traditional marriage... Women want what they can't have or what other women have. Why do you think so many women chase after married men or involvd men. They want to compete with other to get the big prize but once they get the prize they get bored with it. When they have a mans full love and fidelity he starts to look like a brother to them because he is not a challenge.
Author ComeUndone Posted December 4, 2009 Author Posted December 4, 2009 Believe my trust issues are that serious and I feel I am justified. Every time I hear women on here telling me to give up the hate and bitterness I feel like they are trying to cut my balls off and make me another sucker. Or maybe they just want you to experience completely unguarded love.
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Ok, but cheating men that stay married just means the wife doesn't know about it and he's therefore had his cake and ate it too. Not exactly a truthful relationship. Most women stray for reason other than boredom. It depends on how he reacts to it. I know a few old school type of guidos(this is the Jersey Shore after all) who cheat on their women and tell them to deal with it. Most of them are still married. Cheaters get dumped when they beg and grovel for forgiveness.
calizaggy Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Some good points about women who get bored once you fall for them.. And this is true.. I think many men today are brainwashed into believing women want to be "equals".. So you let them in, tell them your problems, worries, feelings, financial difficulties , and you get the opposite response of what you expect. You do not get help or sympathy, but disdain. It is best to be your own man, find a woman that will follow you, and achieve your goals. You are there to provide security, and when you open up to a woman i feel they view it as weak. If it helps, in your own mind view her as a piece of property to protect and guide. For some reason then women won't leave you alone.
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Or maybe they just want you to experience completely unguarded love. I will more likely meet Santa Claus than experience that with modern women.
Boundary Problem Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 They want to compete with other to get the big prize but once they get the prize they get bored with it. When they have a mans full love and fidelity he starts to look like a brother to them because he is not a challenge. 1. chasing after a MM will not result in love and fidelity. It will result in an affair. Not true love. ie companionship with sex. 2. People find affairs exciting because they are a secret 3. Full love and fidelity - I have to admit that in my past once a guy 'fell' for me, it was like being suffocated. But there was no cognitive compatibility. Sometimes the emotions have to be left behind and two people have to be able to freely interact. 4. The brother thing. That keeps coming up.
Pyro Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 How can a man possibly master something that makes no sense whatsoever and can change by the hour? Seriously, why the **** are you married then?
muse08 Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 At the time I was just so relieved to find a good woman and so far she has done nothing to show she is not but I simply trust issues with women. now i remember some of you're posts from a thread of mine last year i think. i think you told me to leave the guy alone that i was talking about b/c i would just break his heart. you confused me:confused:. i was like "why would say something like that when he doesn't even know me like that?" it's all good though. i'm a pretty good woman, but don't trust well either. so i don't think i could marry someone who i didn't trust before we married, 4real. have you discussed this with your wife? do you do things on the defense to hide your lack of trust for her? in your defense, i do know men who would get married even though they don't trust women much, but that's very scary. the reasons for not trusting are either b/c the men themselves are not trustworthy OR they just have been hurt many times.
Boundary Problem Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Some good points about women who get bored once you fall for them.. And this is true.. I think many men today are brainwashed into believing women want to be "equals".. So you let them in, tell them your problems, worries, feelings, financial difficulties , and you get the opposite response of what you expect. You do not get help or sympathy, but disdain. It is best to be your own man, find a woman that will follow you, and achieve your goals. You are there to provide security, and when you open up to a woman i feel they view it as weak. If it helps, in your own mind view her as a piece of property to protect and guide. For some reason then women won't leave you alone. hhhhmmmmmmmm
muse08 Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 It depends on how he reacts to it. I know a few old school type of guidos(this is the Jersey Shore after all) who cheat on their women and tell them to deal with it. Most of them are still married. Cheaters get dumped when they beg and grovel for forgiveness. as they should...they shouldn't have been cheating in the first place:lmao:
AD1980 Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 My friends like woggle hes been cheated on by numeorus women hes been in love with and is i na dark place, feels all women are self centered He says women love being loved in a relationship more then their capable of loving Says relationships are all about the women and her needs wants emotions feelings etc
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 1. chasing after a MM will not result in love and fidelity. It will result in an affair. Not true love. ie companionship with sex. 2. People find affairs exciting because they are a secret 3. Full love and fidelity - I have to admit that in my past once a guy 'fell' for me, it was like being suffocated. But there was no cognitive compatibility. Sometimes the emotions have to be left behind and two people have to be able to freely interact. 4. The brother thing. That keeps coming up. You pretty much admit yourself how most women feel when they have a man's love. They feel suffocated. Chasing after MM will almost always end in heartbreak but don't try to tell an OW that. They feel passion like they have never felt before and it is because they are chasing after the unattainable. The brother thing keeps coming up because that is how most women end up viewing a loving and faithful husband.
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 as they should...they shouldn't have been cheating in the first place:lmao: It is not about the cheating. Men who cheat and tell a woman to just deal with it usually end up faring much better. My barber threatened to cheat after his wife stopped letting him touch her and things turned around for the better almost overnight. Once a man shows any weakness a woman falls out of love and that is why begging for forgiveness never works.
muse08 Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 3. Full love and fidelity - I have to admit that in my past once a guy 'fell' for me, it was like being suffocated. But there was no cognitive compatibility. Sometimes the emotions have to be left behind and two people have to be able to freely interact. I can relate to this completely. This X is still trying to get me back after playing little childish games to get my attention, whether good ro bad.
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 My friends like woggle hes been cheated on by numeorus women hes been in love with and is i na dark place, feels all women are self centered He says women love being loved in a relationship more then their capable of loving Says relationships are all about the women and her needs wants emotions feelings etc Yup. It's all about pleasing her majesty wich is pretty much an impossible task. A man really gets nothing out of it.
muse08 Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Men who cheat and tell a woman to just deal with it usually end up faring much better. My barber threatened to cheat after his wife stopped letting him touch her and things turned around for the better almost overnight. That refers to women who are...dumb... If i/a woman has any self worth, a threat to cheat on me b/c i won't let him touch me is a sign for me to help him pack his things and get out. As myself and boundaryproblems keep telling you, WHEN A WOMAN DOESN'T WANT A MAN TO TOUCH HER OR WHEN SHE DOES OTHER THINGS TO SHOW THAT SHE'S RESENTFUL, THERE IS SOMETHING THAT, THAT MAN HAS DONE TO HURT HER. That's just the truth, mark my word!
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 That refers to women who are...dumb... If i/a woman has any self worth, a threat to cheat on me b/c i won't let him touch me is a sign for me to help him pack his things and get out. As myself and boundaryproblems keep telling you, WHEN A WOMAN DOESN'T WANT A MAN TO TOUCH HER OR WHEN SHE DOES OTHER THINGS TO SHOW THAT SHE'S RESENTFUL, THERE IS SOMETHING THAT, THAT MAN HAS DONE TO HURT HER. That's just the truth, mark my word! Again with you it is always the man's fault. Is there ever anytime a woman is wrong according to you?
Boundary Problem Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Again with you it is always the man's fault. Is there ever anytime a woman is wrong according to you? You know there are two of us debating with Woggle, and I'm ashamed to say - he is wearing me out all on his own. This man has stamina.
calizaggy Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Yup. It's all about pleasing her majesty wich is pretty much an impossible task. A man really gets nothing out of it. Thats why you dont try to please, you do what is important. I see this all the time, and have went through it. As soon as you try to please nothing is enough. You are far better off being a dick 99% of the time, and then one day doing a little thing half way nice. Then they will think you are sweet, loving, caring, etc.
muse08 Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Again with you it is always the man's fault. Is there ever anytime a woman is wrong according to you? Come on. I'm pretty fair and earlier I gave you credit for feeling the way you do. I'm almost the same as you. The difference btwn you and I is (our gender for 1, lol) that I can't maintain my sanity if I agreed to marry someone while having such big trust issues. So I'm not understanding why you are married and listening to your friends who do ignorant stuff like threaten to cheat on someone rather than discussing and trying to understand why the wife won't let the husband touch her. I am a women so I'm giving you my perspective...PERSPECTIVE...in response to your statements, I never said it was the LAW. It's not about being right or wrong, but some of the things you say do not apply to women with standards and self worth, beyond materialism.
Boundary Problem Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Thats why you dont try to please, you do what is important. What is the important stuff?
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Thats why you dont try to please, you do what is important. I see this all the time, and have went through it. As soon as you try to please nothing is enough. You are far better off being a dick 99% of the time, and then one day doing a little thing half way nice. Then they will think you are sweet, loving, caring, etc. I don't even have to be a dick. I just do what I want and she can take it or leave it. If she is not happy she can have a one way ticket outr of the marriage if she wants but I am not emasculating myself for any woman.
Boundary Problem Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 Got it. Men doing what they want, is the important stuff. Answered the question myself.
Woggle Posted December 4, 2009 Posted December 4, 2009 On the surface I may not agree with threatening to cheat but it worked and I am all about results. If it gets good results I advise men to do it. If women don't like it they should be more appreciative of men who treat them well.
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