hew Posted November 26, 2009 Posted November 26, 2009 I basically just feel upset and stressed alot because of freinds. It's hard having a best friend who is friends with a particular group that you take no part it. I just feel like the back-up freind sometimes. I try talking to her but she just says " you know im your best freind you shouldnt have to worry about that stuff" i feel better when she says it but still.. Thats one thing, THEN i feel like since my ex i keep trying to find a new boyfriend or someone to get close too. Everytime i do they just stop talking to me, say they only want to be freinds. or once they find out i wont do "stuff" (sexual stuff) with them, they dont talk to me anymore. I hate feeling like im not good enough for people. I do take medication for depression and see a therapist and family doctor once in a while. But i was just wondering if there is anyone else out there who can relate to me, give me some coping skills or just give some good adivice? i would really like it if someone responded.
AliveAndKicking Posted November 26, 2009 Posted November 26, 2009 Hi there! I can relate to you as I've been somewhat of an outsider most of my adult life. What is it about your friend's crown that turns you off from them? Different interests or maybe they party a lot or ??? Just because you're friend with one person does not mean you have to be friends with or hang around her crowd. Perhaps you can find your own niche BUT it is going to take some effort of your part. I've found that when I step a little bit outside of my comfort zone I usually enjoy the experience and it makes it easier the next time. I'm not suggesting you compromise your values to any great degree but maybe it would serve you well to open your mind a bit, step a little bit outside of your comfort zone, and be open to new experiences. Maybe you have a hobby or interest and find a group or club where you will share common interests with others. Just an idea... Any guy who doesn't want to get to know you and is only interested in sex, well, he's a loser and you're better off without him. I think it's great that you have morals and values and refuse to modify them to fit in! Personally I think those are VERY attractive qualities in a lady! Maybe these concerns are something you might wish to discuss with your therapist. A therapist can be a great resource and very helpful so by all means take advantage of that! Sometimes what seems to be a big insurmountable problem is not that big- we make it big in our mind but once we step back from it, well, it's not so big after all. Maybe you're over-thinking this and being a little too hard on yourself? Food for thought... Keep dating and eventually you'll meet a gentleman who will value your morals as much as you do. Believe me- there are plenty of great guys out there who would just love to meet a gal just like YOU! Happy Thanksgiving!
ladyblondie Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 My whole life I been an outsider, and it get pretty lonely. So, with that said I turned my loneliness to finding people with similar interests on Craigslist. Ive met great people and we are all working on good friendships. I don't know, maybe this might help you. good luck and happy thanksgiving.
Brady_to_Moss Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 I know for a fact i am an outsider. I dont relate to really anyone...no best friends or many friends at that. Lot of time alot ect. Yeah it sucks but nothing i can really do about it. I am who i am. If others don't like it, their loss.
m4ndrake Posted November 29, 2009 Posted November 29, 2009 Just be who you are. I'm sure there are others more like you.
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