murphomatic Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 Broke up with my girl Friday... very verbose thread about it over in the Dating section if you want the history. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t193048/ So I'd been fighting my emotions all weekend, vacillating between responding to her request to talk, and remain NC. I screwed up and called her Sunday night when I bumped the phone in my pocket. Wound up leaving a minute long message of pocket noise. She text'd back a little later saying sorry she'd missed my call, had hoped that my call wasn't an accident, and would be around if I wanted to talk. She also sent an email Saturday saying that she thought I regretted breaking up with her, and thought that I wanted her to think that too, and after much reflection, she would be willing to talk. Anyway, my emotions got the better of me and I text'd back saying I'd call her after a little while. In the meantime, I stupidly sent her a slideshow video of pics of us dubbed to music that I had made earlier, and been sobbing over most of the day. She said it was beautiful and intense. I called her later with the purpose of letting her know that I was willing to talk, but that I needed a little time to think and clear my head. On the phone, she seemed tense and short, and replied that "well, as someone that has sat here and stared at the phone for the last 60 hours, I don't want to wait another couple days for you to get your head straight." I told her sorry, that was just how it was, and then asked her if she wanted to get together to talk on Tuesday... she agreed. I told her I loved her no matter what happened, and that it would be good to talk and figure things out, said goodbye and hung up the phone. She never told me that she loved me too during the call, but I got a text from her minutes later that said she loved me too, but just didn't know what to say right now. I replied that I felt the same way, that we'd talk soon and it would be good no matter the conclusion...that I would always love her. Haven't heard from her again save for this morning's text asking a question related to her biology homework. The more I sit and think, the more I swing violently between wanting to cancel our meeting, or go through with it and either work things out, or (more likely) bring things to closure. I'm spooked to talk to her tomorrow...that's for sure. I fear it will turn into the screaming match that it always seems to become. There are so many things about her that need to change .. and while I'm 99% sure that people really don't change, there's that 1% in me that wants to be optimistic about the potential of human nature... My plan, as it stands currently, is to go ahead and talk to her tomorrow, but to immediately establish the ground-rules for the talk. No raised voices, no hurtful rhetoric, no ad hominem, and meet on neutral ground, I'm fairly certain I know how she'll respond to my setting of rules - she'll want to argue about that first and be offended by her perceiving me to be controlling. I'm hoping she doesn't, or if she does, I can divert things back to a serious discussion. Am I nucking futs? I feel like I am..
NopeNah Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 It happens,man. I got a few text's tonight from my ex with "I've never felt this way about anyone, I wish you'd talk to me,ect.." not to mention alot of unanswered calls from her. It sucks but, I know I'm better off without her and am trying to start my "new" life,without her in it. Do what I do and go back and read the old threads you made about her. It's VERY easy to remember only the good moments in these trying times.
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