Broke NC bc he IM'ed me...feel like S***

[rickigal]

So the ex Im'ed me and I stupidly answered. He told me he was thinking about contacting me for his own selfish reasons. He wants ex-sex. I feel like crap. I want to die right now. He was like "why can't you? too many emotions?" "I'm a guy so..." F-him. I hate him. I hate me even more.

[nobmagnet]

what a silly pratt! hey you only open them when you have the right guy! He is not. He is messing with your head. My bloke tried it on with me after 4 weeks apart and I said no. He hated it because i had always said yes. Glad it hurt him.

 

take great strenght in the fact you refused. well done my sweet and stay strong!

 

xx

[rickigal]

Well now I'm almost glad I talked to him. Now I know there is no chance for reconciliation. He just thinks of me for sex. I can move on now without the question in my mind if he wants me back. The answer is clear now. I still feel like **** but I deserve better. I thought we had more than that but apparently not. That is what hurts.

[nobmagnet]

yep hon you are right. worth more???? i should say!

 

your a star x

[rickigal]

Ok, here is the actual IM conversation:

 

(12:15:00 pm)midnightsun50:hey

 

(12:15:11 pm)Rikigal:hey

 

(12:17:29 pm)Rikigal:so how are you?

 

(12:19:04 pm)midnightsun50:i'm good. i like your profile pic. someone's head is cut off hehe

 

(12:19:14 pm)Rikigal:haha

 

(12:19:31 pm)Rikigal:only you can tell that

 

(12:20:22 pm)midnightsun50:well, i was there

 

(12:20:35 pm)Rikigal:were you?

 

(12:20:37 pm)Rikigal:i forgot

 

(12:20:52 pm)midnightsun50:yeah, ok...

 

(12:21:01 pm)midnightsun50:so how are you doing?

 

(12:21:07 pm)Rikigal:i'm ok

 

(12:21:22 pm)Rikigal:jon finally paid me

 

(12:21:59 pm)midnightsun50:congrats

 

(12:22:18 pm)Rikigal:thanks, had to sue him though

 

(12:22:48 pm)Rikigal:i relapsed...40 days now. have a sponsor, go to a meeting almost every day

 

(12:22:48 pm)midnightsun50:whatever works i guess

 

(12:23:01 pm)Rikigal:working on my 4th step

 

(12:23:44 pm)midnightsun50:i just had 3 months

 

(12:23:50 pm)Rikigal:congrats

 

(12:24:43 pm)midnightsun50:thank you. i am glad you went back to meetings

 

(12:25:01 pm)midnightsun50:are you going to one tonight?

 

(12:25:09 pm)Rikigal:me too. i have the girls

 

(12:25:16 pm)Rikigal:i usually go to prince of peace

 

(12:26:33 pm)Rikigal:i met my girl soulmate at a meeting lol

 

(12:26:47 pm)midnightsun50:changed teams? lol

 

(12:27:07 pm)Rikigal:haha, nah. just an awesome friend

 

(12:27:28 pm)Rikigal:sometimes i think i might want to

 

(12:27:48 pm)Rikigal:j/k

 

(12:28:07 pm)midnightsun50:lol

 

(12:28:25 pm)midnightsun50:you like that too much hehe

 

(12:28:32 pm)Rikigal:shut up

 

(12:28:42 pm)Rikigal:been lacking in that dept

 

(12:29:05 pm)Rikigal:not lacking, non-existent

 

(12:30:13 pm)midnightsun50:sorry to hear that. funny, i thought about seeing what you were doing last week. it was for my own evil needs, so i did not

 

(12:30:27 pm)Rikigal:that's not cool

 

(12:30:46 pm)Rikigal:why would you tell me that?

 

(12:31:15 pm)midnightsun50:i'm sorry, meant no disrespect

 

(12:31:38 pm)Rikigal:that was very hurtful

 

(12:32:09 pm)midnightsun50:i'm sorry

 

(12:32:27 pm)Rikigal:it's ok

 

(12:32:53 pm)midnightsun50:i feel terrible about that

 

(12:33:13 pm)Rikigal:well it just made me feel like i was just a piece of ass to you

 

(12:33:56 pm)midnightsun50:you know better than that i hope

 

(12:34:30 pm)Rikigal:i don't unfortunately

 

(12:37:36 pm)midnightsun50:again i am sorry about that

 

(12:38:08 pm)Rikigal:i always wondered if you ever thought about me, then by saying what you said...

 

(12:38:19 pm)Rikigal:you thought of me for sex

 

(12:38:32 pm)Rikigal:

 

(12:38:32 pm)midnightsun50:that isn't true

 

(12:38:39 pm)midnightsun50:not just, really

 

(12:38:51 pm)Rikigal:ok

 

(12:42:30 pm)Rikigal:how are the kitties?

 

(12:42:51 pm)midnightsun50:they are getting big. nicko is bad but i still love him

 

(12:42:52 pm)Rikigal:and lily?

 

(12:44:31 pm)midnightsun50:she's really good. parent teacher conferences are next week

 

(12:44:59 pm)Rikigal:i had that already, jon brought his gf...very awkward

 

(12:45:34 pm)midnightsun50:ugh

 

(12:46:11 pm)Rikigal:ok well, i'm happy you are good. i do miss you.

 

(12:46:12 pm)midnightsun50:i had to deal with all of beth's family and friends. her father died on halloween

 

(12:46:21 pm)Rikigal:oh no

 

(12:46:29 pm)Rikigal:how was that?

 

(12:47:21 pm)midnightsun50:it was good to see a lot of them, been quite a while

 

(12:47:53 pm)midnightsun50:we've been talking a lot again, but not in the getting back together sense

 

(12:48:22 pm)Rikigal:is that what you want?

 

(12:48:50 pm)midnightsun50:no

 

(12:49:57 pm)midnightsun50:i am just getting myself together again

 

(12:50:05 pm)Rikigal:that's good

 

(12:50:49 pm)Rikigal:well i feel crappy now. i shouldn't have contacted you.

 

(12:50:56 pm)midnightsun50:so you forgive me about the ex-sex comment?

 

(12:51:21 pm)midnightsun50:no, it is cool

 

(12:51:55 pm)Rikigal:i forgive you.

 

(12:52:13 pm)midnightsun50:yay

 

(12:52:23 pm)Rikigal:i would love to do that...but i can't

 

(12:52:48 pm)Rikigal:i am human and i have emotions

 

(12:52:48 pm)midnightsun50:too emotional?

 

(12:52:59 pm)Rikigal:yes, apparently not for you

 

(12:53:12 pm)midnightsun50:i am a guy

 

(12:53:32 pm)midnightsun50:anyway, i am off to lunch. i am glad you are doing what you need to do

 

(12:53:40 pm)midnightsun50:talk to you soon

 

(12:53:41 pm)Rikigal:bye

[fofiffs]

WOW what a douche bag...He actually had the nerve to say that to you. He totally ain't worth it...

[Taucher]

Did he dump you?

 

Either way, well done. As now the power has shifted to you. You turned HIM down. Now he can feel rejection and all that. Now he has the message that you are not a pushover, you are an independant person with integrity. Now he can think about what he has done, what he has lost because I have a feeling that he thought you might say yes, be greatful even. And you put him right.

 

Next time, do not respond or communicate if he tries to reach out to you. Build on what you have done. Show him you deserve better.

 

Chin up, head high. You have no reson to feel bad about yourself.

 

Take care

 

T

[twinklecat]

That's awful! I have to agree what someone else said on here, what a douche! Hope you're okay

[j_cali_man]

Dang what a scumbag thing to do. His utter lack of not caring about you (or probably anyone else besides himself) is crystal clear. Hopefully the only good thing from his texts is that you are more determined to NC his punk a** including all future texts and such. What a jerk.

 

J

[JaggedRoad]

Your ex needs to get slapped--twice. And this is coming from a 21-year-old male with a very active sex drive.

[rickigal]

Yes he dumped me...and thanks all! He is a douche...a douche that acted like a loving person during our relationship. F-him! I have already blocked him everywhere. Onward!