leap83 Posted November 22, 2009 Posted November 22, 2009 I just wanted to give a small update: I'm talking with him over the phone today. Finally gathered the courage to apologize and talk through some of the things that contributed to failing of our relationship. I'm feeling a tad bit nervous, even though I know what I'm going to say and more importantly HOW I'm going to say it. Only recently I realized that most of the time what I want to say doesn't come out the right way. Also, my actions rarely match my words - my words are way ahead of my actions. It's like a pendulum - my actions go at a very slow pace and then my words just come out. One thing I have learned so far is never to say/promise something you cannot achieve or you're not 100% certain you can achieve at that point in time. So, I'm talking with him in an hour or so. I'll try my best to keep this conversation light and to the point. I'm not hoping for anything - well, I'm hoping that we can be friends (relationship wise... mmm... not right now... maybe some time in the future... maybe).
mickleb Posted November 22, 2009 Posted November 22, 2009 Bonjour madame I don't think you need to be fretting, at all. What's the worst that can happen? If you're ready to talk to him, just do it. If you're not sure you are, don't. Good luck. x
Author leap83 Posted November 22, 2009 Author Posted November 22, 2009 Well, I'm happy to say that it went very well! Based on today's conversation with him, I believe we can build a strong friendship which could potentially transition into more when we're both ready for that to happen. Right now, my focus is on building the friendship and giving us a chance to grow and trust one another through mutual friendly support. Once the trust is established and we feel comfortable in our lives - well, we'll see what happens then. There was no awkwardness or confusion in our conversation. No anger, resentment, holding grudges. We mostly agreed in our thoughts (he blames himself a lot for the failure of our relationship which is not the case - it takes 2 to tango, but I think I've affirmed him that it wasn't all his fault and I believe he listened to me). We're aiming to see each other before Christmas for a cup of coffee and see what happens (in terms of friendship). I'm so glad this turned out the way it did. I'm really happy that we were able to save what we had before and that it is not completely and utterly destroyed. Also, I was really glad to hear some of the things he said today. Overall, talking for the first time over the phone was a pure success.
mickleb Posted November 22, 2009 Posted November 22, 2009 Glad it all turned out for the best, leap. x
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