twinklecat Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 In such a bad mood today. Can't concentrate at work. Had a really good couple of days. Decided i'm moving out sometime in December as opposed to waiting till January, as I really can't stand it in that house much longer. Got some viewings for places setup next week, so hopefully will see one I like! She has been back home visiting family, during that time he's been nice, chatty etc. He announced he wanted us to go through our stuff, which I had already made a start on. He seemed shocked, and then has done nothing since, even after me asking him to sort it out - so have decided, when I'm off next, I'll sort it myself. Anywhoo, the good feeling came crashing down last night she came back. I needed something from him, so knocked on his bedroom door and the entire room STANK of aftershave, and he did too, he hasn't worn aftershave in a long time, obv tarting himself for her return. It's s***like this that makes me feel SICK, having to actually SEE it, and I feel like i'm back to where I started, grrrr.
GrayClouds Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 In such a bad mood today. Can't concentrate at work. Had a really good couple of days. and I feel like i'm back to where I started, grrrr. But your not. Just knowing that you can actually have a "couple of good days" which is so much farther along then when you started. Isn't it? Soon the good days will equal the bad days and then most days will simply be boring and will actually kind of miss the swings:laugh: It will be so much better when you move out. (that was not aftershave that was smart, high quality lady repellent...and its working!)
Author twinklecat Posted November 21, 2009 Author Posted November 21, 2009 But your not. Just knowing that you can actually have a "couple of good days" which is so much farther along then when you started. Isn't it? Soon the good days will equal the bad days and then most days will simply be boring and will actually kind of miss the swings:laugh: It will be so much better when you move out. (that was not aftershave that was smart, high quality lady repellent...and its working!) Haha that really made me laugh because it's true! He came off as such a sleaze, dunno how I never saw that before! And you're completely right, the fact I've had good days does mean I have made progress, think I just beat myself up too much for when I feel down or upset/angry over this. Thanks Grayclouds!
mickleb Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 Hello lady. You have NOT ONE THING to beat yourself up about! So stop that, please. Your situation is so hard to be in. You are doing incredibly. I'm so happy to read you'll be moving out in December now. Perhaps you can have a Happy Christmas, after all?! Most people find the process of moving out of the place where they lived with their partners, incredibly painful. I have a feeling it might be the happiest day you'll have experienced in a long time. Stay focused on this. x
Author twinklecat Posted November 21, 2009 Author Posted November 21, 2009 Hey mickleb! Thanks for your post, your replies always lift me up! The reason why I beat myself up is because I've found out what a lying P**** he is, I feel bad for getting upset over him, at times. I am looking forward to moving, although it's a tad scary, never done stuff like this myself, he always sorted it, it's also quite liberating at the same time. I also got some good news from work, I'm being allowed to go home to my country to see my family over Christmas, so it should be a happier Christmas than I first thought 4 weeks ago.
mickleb Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 That's really good news, hon. I'm so pleased for you. I know what you mean about getting annoyed with yourself because you fell for their particular brand of sh*t. Mine wasn't even that bad, just useless. And I didn't see it. I think that's mostly because we're just nice though, and able to trust people. That's not a crime. I must say, your post intrigued me, not least because of the 5-letter p word that got censored. I mean, what word was it? P*ssy, pr*ck, p*nis, punta (a female dog according to the swear word dictionary I just accessed )? And with a capital P! Am I being slow tonight and have missed something obvious? (It'll bug me till I sleep!) x
Author twinklecat Posted November 22, 2009 Author Posted November 22, 2009 Yep, I'm a very trusting person, this has taught me one hell of a lesson though in that respect! The 5 letter word is pr*ck, no idea why I capitalized it! Must have been having a bit of rage lol. Thanks again for being here, you really do lift my spirits. I hope you're okay btw x
GrayClouds Posted November 22, 2009 Posted November 22, 2009 The 5 letter word is pr*ck, no idea why I capitalized it! I suspect in this case it was a very "Proper" noun.
Author twinklecat Posted November 22, 2009 Author Posted November 22, 2009 I suspect in this case it was a very "Proper" noun. Haha! Very true! Must say it's weird how ya can swing moods so much. Imean I have been through breakups in the past, but they were nothing serious. When I wrote this thread eariler I was in such a crappy mood, now I'm actually sitting typing this smiling! I just look forward to these good times, they are becomming more an more frequent!
GrayClouds Posted November 22, 2009 Posted November 22, 2009 Haha! Very true! Must say it's weird how ya can swing moods so much. Imean I have been through breakups in the past, but they were nothing serious. When I wrote this thread eariler I was in such a crappy mood, now I'm actually sitting typing this smiling! I just look forward to these good times, they are becomming more an more frequent! How can you not be smiling with all this high quality humor being offered
Author twinklecat Posted November 22, 2009 Author Posted November 22, 2009 Hehe indeed! Thanks for all the support! SO he picked me up from work tonight (only other alternative is taxi, which I can't afford) Told me she has found a house, put a deposit down on it and will be moving in asap. He then said he's found somewhere, but needs to save money first before he can get the place. So get this, he's going to move in her house in her spare room until he has the money for his place. I just looked at him and said basically "do you expect me to believe this story?" He then says how frank, honest and open he's being and thought I'd appreciate it!! So anyways, I changed the subject, was talking about a male friend coming to visit me next month, and he goes on to say how impressed he is by my recent behaviour and sorting my life out. Then says that when we go our seperate ways, out of the house of doom, we'll see how we feel and go from there!! What the hell is wrong with him?? I just ignored what he said, really didn't know what to say to him.
GrayClouds Posted November 22, 2009 Posted November 22, 2009 Hehe indeed! Thanks for all the support! SO he picked me up from work tonight (only other alternative is taxi, which I can't afford) Told me she has found a house, put a deposit down on it and will be moving in asap. He then said he's found somewhere, but needs to save money first before he can get the place. So get this, he's going to move in her house in her spare room until he has the money for his place. I just looked at him and said basically "do you expect me to believe this story?" He then says how frank, honest and open he's being and thought I'd appreciate it!! So anyways, I changed the subject, was talking about a male friend coming to visit me next month, and he goes on to say how impressed he is by my recent behaviour and sorting my life out. Then says that when we go our seperate ways, out of the house of doom, we'll see how we feel and go from there!! What the hell is wrong with him?? I just ignored what he said, really didn't know what to say to him. Start singing him this moldy oldy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dHUfy_YBps
Author twinklecat Posted November 23, 2009 Author Posted November 23, 2009 (edited) Start singing him this moldy oldy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dHUfy_YBps Haha! Why do they do this? I am absolutely raging atm. Both with the thought of them sharing a house (in the spare room my ar**) and how dare he say that to me about the future!!!! Oh and forgot to add that he said he made a rash decision with regards to ending it! Give me a break Mr Man!!!! Edited November 23, 2009 by twinklecat
mickleb Posted November 23, 2009 Posted November 23, 2009 Haha! Why do they do this? I am absolutely raging atm. Both with the thought of them sharing a house (in the spare room my ar**) and how dare he say that to me about the future!!!! Oh and forgot to add that he said he made a rash decision with regards to ending it! Give me a break Mr Man!!!! Gangly ol' Lennon goofing around Noi Yoik. Bless 'im. I bet Tiffany's was AWESOME in the 70's. Imagine all that bling.. It must sort-of help, twinkle, knowing he's a mental. But then comes the shame that you actually did rude things with them, doesn't it? I think, maybe, you should start playing some 'mind games' of your own with them. Like offering to make the two of them some cheese on toast for breakfast-in-bed but doing it with just a small piece of mouldy cheese, all grated up, so they'd never notice. (It won't harm them, it's only penicillin but it'll make you all warm inside when they guiltily thank you SO much for being so kind then trough down every last crumb!) Hmmnn, just thinking of some others... *Flings head back as far as humanly possible at let's out the cackle of a banshee flying into the moonlight* Enjoy! x
GrayClouds Posted November 23, 2009 Posted November 23, 2009 cackle of a banshee flying into the moonlight* Enjoy! x a banshee is a sign of death, with the day I am having, now I am nervous
Author twinklecat Posted November 24, 2009 Author Posted November 24, 2009 Hehe, I don't think I'm gonna do anything like that tbh, just wanna move on with my life. Atm I guess I'm incredibly bitter, but that's because I'm actually seeing all this crap going on. I just keep flying from one thing to another, I'll chat to him sometimes, generally if he starts the conversation first. Then i just flat out ignore him, like I did all day today. Was rather amusing, he came down to my floor, he smiled and I just ignored him and walked over to someone else and talked to them, he came over to try join in, got ignored again, then he buggered off in a huff. Just after that happened, she came and was looking round for him and she looked like a lost sheep, it just really amused me.
Author twinklecat Posted November 26, 2009 Author Posted November 26, 2009 Hey all Just had to come and post here because I've had such a fantastic day! Me and housemate have found a place to live and it's lovely! Cannot wait to move in! I also had a very long phonecall with my stepmother last night, and it's like a lightbulb went off in my head. It made me realise I really do not want him, and I am MUCH happier on my own, away from him! I feel I have turned a corner, albeit very quickly, as it all ended only 4 weeks ago, but I've just come to a tremendous realisation of what an awful, controling, manipulative, self centred, EXTREMELY insecure bully he is, and it's just stopped the hope because I don't wanna go back there! I feel like a HUGE weight has been lifted off my shoulders and I feel so free. I know I will still likely get down at times, but in this past week I've had so many ups and so little downs. I'm gonna be okay! I have a hell of alot of plans for myself, for the future, it's been a long time since I thought like that. This is turning to be one of the best things that has happened to me.
mickleb Posted November 26, 2009 Posted November 26, 2009 Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!! I'm SO happy for you, twinkle. Great news on both fronts. I remember the day I turned my corner. It fkn ROCKED! So, so pleased you have a new place to put your energy into and that you are now able to clear away all the scummy emotion he left on your lap, and see him for the big, wishy-washy, lying loser he really is. I'm putting the kettle on and will raise my mug o' char to you! xxxx :bunny::bunny::bunny:
GrayClouds Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 I'm gonna be okay! Your going to be better then ok! Congratulate you on how far you have come and now turn those plans into action.
Author twinklecat Posted November 27, 2009 Author Posted November 27, 2009 Thanks both of you! *raises cup* I'm still having a few down moments, but they pass quite quickly, I'm just really excited for things to come! And really cannot wait to move into this place and get it how I like it hehe.
mickleb Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 Yee-har! I'm putting the kettle on again! F*ck it - I'm getting out a Twix! 8) x
GrayClouds Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 I'm still having a few down moments, Welcome to life!
GrayClouds Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 Yee-har! I'm putting the kettle on again! F*ck it - I'm getting out a Twix! 8) x Hmmm, I would have guessed a Carr's graham biscuit with that tea...do they still sell the chocolate covered ones in jolly old E?
mickleb Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 I know not of this cracker. The Twix is a very special thing that is only reached for after very special things have happened. (I suggest you review previous references to it's loveliness I may have made.) x
Author twinklecat Posted November 28, 2009 Author Posted November 28, 2009 Hehe, Twix = yum! So I've come in tonight after a good day at work and feel rubbish again. Only thing that seems to be causing this is the fact of having to see him every damn day. Not long to go till that stops though so it's all good, light at the end of the tunnel n all that. Suprise suprise btw, he STILL has not sorted his stuff out in the big cupboard. I've sorted the majority of my stuff, but there are quite a few boxes that are too heavy for me to lift, secondly really don't want to be going thrugh his junk.
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