novack Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 hey LS, short story: 2 year r/s, broke up 2 1/2 months ago was 42 days NC.... we broke up bc she wanted to be alone So i knew my ex had gotten into a serious r/s (ugh)... and there was a huge party at their house last night... i wasn't going to go but i ended up there with a bunch of friends... i saw them make out and was kinda okay with it (hard to say it was good but i lived). At one point we started talking in a pretty public place, it ended up being an hour conversation were she broke down in tears (over nothing really) and i remained calm/collected.... basically i told her she treated me very poorly at the end and i forgave her for what she did bc life is too short... I told her i was happy she in love with a new guy (she started to cry then) and that if she is really happy with him than only the best for the future.. She told me she loved me and i told her i love her back (not the same way as before but more like a family friend way), but it was impossible/un fair to her new bf to have those feelings for me..(again she cries here).. Her bf sees all this and just lets it be bc i think he realized my ex /me had some un finished closure... I told her not to hurt anyone again like she did me and i hoped her all the best in the future.. all i wanted from her was a sorry didn't get it hahah.... i prob won't see my ex now until the beg of school next year in Aug. after we both go on exchange which is a long time from now... I think she was shocked that i was so calm and collected... obviously i'm a little more messed up still than she knows as i'm still here... I found out yesterday she cheated on me with 3 (just make outs) including her current bf hence the reason for break-up.. makes alot of sense now i was going to send her a text apologizing for making her cry in public but that she needed to know that getting into another r/s so quickly was ****ty but that i forgave her and hope the 2 of them all the best.... should i send it??? might be pointless i guess JUST Looking for words, ideas, thoughts about what you guys think i did , where i'm at in the whole healing thing and just wanted to talk to someone about it
Author novack Posted November 21, 2009 Author Posted November 21, 2009 hey guys i'm gonna re post this bc i'm on the verge of texting my ex about last night but i know i shouldn't please someone look at this
McGrupp Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 why text her? leave it like that. if its true (everything you wrote) then you leave on higher ground
nobmagnet Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 (edited) it will leave her feeling ok about what she did. no, let her stew move on and it will do her good you did the right thing to talk to her and show your stength. It was she that cried because she could see you were in a good place (even tho you didnt feel it) leave it as it was left if you can because right now you ahve been a true gentleman. Any more contact will confuse you and make you look desparate sorry if thats harsh x Edited November 21, 2009 by nobmagnet had moreto say
Author novack Posted November 21, 2009 Author Posted November 21, 2009 honestly its true... i was sooo calm and collected (even though i'm a mess most of the times) and was soooooo nice to her about the whole thing... i guess i am a true gentleman... haha
2sunny Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 don't contact her at all! she never apologized - geeeez, what a dork. so what's to discuss further? any attempt to reach out will make you look weak and discount your firm info delivered at the party that makes it appear that you are moving forward. she cried... big deal. gals do that a lot when they drink... they do that a lot when they feel guilty or that they've been caught. they do that to try to get out of the troubled conversation they don't care to participate in... YA, THEY DO IT TO MANIPULATE the outcome of a conversation. she cheated - 3 times - let her go - move on to someone healthier.
GrayClouds Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 You didn't MAKE her cry her previous behavior did...You handle the situation with class, anything more wll spoil it. LEAVE IT BE!
nobmagnet Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 here here!!!! I doff my hat to you sir..........Class indeed.
Author novack Posted November 21, 2009 Author Posted November 21, 2009 It just soo crazy... we split cause she needed to be alone... She is leaving for the rest of the year next month, as am i.... Why would she get into another r/s so quickly and also why when she is leaving anyways.... I loved the girl but she is messed up i guess
GrayClouds Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 It just soo crazy... we split cause she needed to be alone... Because the guilt of cheating behind your back was ruining the fun.
2sunny Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 It just soo crazy... we split cause she needed to be alone... She is leaving for the rest of the year next month, as am i.... Why would she get into another r/s so quickly and also why when she is leaving anyways.... I loved the girl but she is messed up i guess she lied - and SHE knows this. she didn't leave because she intended to be ALONE... she left because she found someone else she wanted to date. THAT is the reality of her.
Author novack Posted November 21, 2009 Author Posted November 21, 2009 and when you think you know someone... wow i never thought i knew someone better...i thought/felt i could predict her actions cause i thought i could read her mind.. hahahah i was very wrong i guess
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