ditched Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 (edited) Last night, I had my first semi-sexual encounter since my breakup back in June. I’ve only known this girl for a couple weeks, and last night was a bit unexpected. Though, as awesome as it was, I still felt an aching sensation of guilt while it was happening. Like I was doing something wrong (to my ex?). Both of us are single, and nothing about our being together is sketchy or secret. But I just felt guilty and thoughts of my ex kept popping into my head, even while I was with the new girl. Now, the day after, I’m pining for my ex more than I am this new friend of mine. Does this mean that I’m not ready to be dating? I don’t want to hurt anyone. truly It just kills me that back in September, during an accidental lapse in NC, the ex tells me that she was on the fourth date with the guy I saw her with. And here I am, almost six months after the fact, and I only now (barely) built up the confidence and desire to even go on a single date with a girl. And the whole time I was on this little date, I kept finding myself thinking about HER. wtf. I still don't really know why i was dumped in the first place. anyways. i dont really know what i'm asking. or if i'm asking anything. I just dont really have anyone or anywhere else to vent these thoughts. All my friends, and even my family are just like "cmon, its been long enough, get over it". effffffff. Edited November 20, 2009 by ditched poor grammar!
McGrupp Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 im in the same boat, although i only went about 2 months. i feel the same way. like i have no real attraction, but do, but feel guilty. idk its so weird. but ill say its good for our confidence in some aspect even if it doesnt work out. i would tell the new hook up (use grace when doing this) that you got dumped recently (lie cause 6 months sounds long LOL) and be like i just want to take it slow. also refrain from bringing up the EX at all! this is very important. better then being lonely with your right hand on a friday night in my opinion.
jerseyboy Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 Its natural Just keep with it Frankly its the reason you never want to get too emotionally atached to someone who is dating for first time out of a relationship. They call it rebound relationships for a reason. Generally that person is just someone for the recently seperated to work out their issues with, and the next person is the one they actually stay with. Sucks but just the way it is
sean1970 Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 Its natural Just keep with it Frankly its the reason you never want to get too emotionally atached to someone who is dating for first time out of a relationship. They call it rebound relationships for a reason. Generally that person is just someone for the recently seperated to work out their issues with, and the next person is the one they actually stay with. Sucks but just the way it is We all remember the horse that threw us when we decide to ride again... Hmmm not the best metaphor but you get the idea
nobleguy Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 We all remember the horse that threw us when we decide to ride again... Hmmm not the best metaphor but you get the idea LOL! That is a good one I've been out on a few dates and they pretty much all did nothing for me. Had a one night stand and am seeing a lady on and off. Seeing another lady tonight and although they don't really do anything for me emotionally it's nice to learn I am not an alien and that I might (just...) still be attractive.
mickleb Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 better then being lonely with your right hand on a friday night in my opinion. Sometimes there's nothing better in the world than my (left, admittedly) hand on a Friday night. Or any other night, for that matter. Except, perhaps, for the Twix and cup of tea, afterwards.
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