Emilyifd39 Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 I don't want to make this long. I met a guy a year ago we hit it off. I ended up pregnant. So we moved things fast. Moved in together in April. He lost his job. I was off a work due to pregnancy complications. Let alone I was depressed before I met him from a previous relaitonship. I had a hard time letting him get to know me and became a bitch. He lost interedt with my behavour long before we moved in. We had a still born two months ago this weekend. It has not helped with my depression and has made me emotionally unstable. We had good times but there were bad times. We had a fight two weeks ago and I took some of my stuff from his house. I don't understand if he is being just nice but he know answers my calls and he never has before. I have showed how strong I am by not constantly texting or calling him. Went out and had a good time. we live in a small towm. This past weekend he knew I was out by seeing my car and kept drving past the place I was not sure if he wanted to get a reaction or not. His friends asked where he was and I said you didn't hear. I will usually tell people when i dump someone he is not braggin about it around town. I am not talking bad about him. I guess we don't want ot burn bridges. I am confused why we are so civil with each other after everything and that he takes my calls and we don't bring up what happened. In a fight he tod me even when I am not depressed he wil never want to get to know me. Is this connection with the baby just that strong that we are being civil and conversating a little when we see each other. We don't blame each other for our chid death. We talked on the phone and he didn't even bring up when I am getting the rest of my furniture. Which i thought he would. I want to work on myself but he was very good to me and I want him to know me even as a friend. can it happen? Is the baby connection what is keeping us civil right now?
ADF Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 I don't know about the "baby connection" theory. But I will say one thing--and sorry if it offends you--thank God you don't have a child. Think about how much more chaotic, overwhelming, and acrimonious your relationship would be if the pressures of parenthood were bearing down on both of you right now. You dodged a bullet.
User320 Posted November 20, 2009 Posted November 20, 2009 i want to say first off im very sorry for your loss, be strong ok, now to the point, Guys really struggle to be friends after a relationship, its hard for us, we (me) still love the other one...and "friends" is a slap in the face...sorry to say, i dont wanna sound like a jerk.. also my relationship Spiraled out of control after a miscarriage...it was devastating, i wanted to be a daddy so bad... it still hurts... and i was told that i was faking my emotions and that i was happy that the baby didnt make it... perhaps after he gets over what happened thing will get bad, maybe not. i cant speak for all men, just for me.. but if it were me id try my damnedest to patch things up, because what i think was hard on me is twice that on you.
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