Nikki Sahagin Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 Lately i've been feeling really allienated and completely detatched from life. I've always been quite serious and I don't always see the lighter side of life. I like to think in many ways that I am very mature but emotionally I am a bit more stunted (incredibly sensitive/angry easily). I have had very close friends in the past but over the years have grown apart from them all. Either they have taken up with things that I disagree with such as drugs and promiscuity and I have therefore been cut out purely because I don't do those things or they are obsessed with getting drunk or always gossipping or they come across to me as vacuous and shallow. I've begun to realise that with most of my friends there is a perfomative level; that when i'm around them I have to be different to who I truly am. It seems to me that everyone my own age is just obsessed with drinking and sex and has such a childish attitude to everything. I don't know if I just high-strung or too moralistic and judgemental but I find it hard to stomach and everyone seems to think there's something wrong with my view that binge-drinking is boring and promiscuity is wrong (at least for me in my life). I feel unaccepted for who I am and what I believe. I almost feel too old for my age. I think this is in part because of my breakup and prior to this I had panic disorder/agrophobia so I think I became very negative. I find a lot of things very juvenile and irritating and so I feel really allienated, like I kind of have to wait for everyone else to grow up? And just be lonely and bored because of it? Anyone else feel the same.
Ross PK Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 (edited) To be honest they are right, there is something wrong with your views, you come across as very snobby and uptight. How old are you? If you are 35 or older, or old for your age, then yeah, it's understandable that you may find people in their 20's to act a lot younger than you do, but it's still not right for you to look down on them as though there must be something wrong with them. I'm not trying to put you down with my post or anything, just being honest and trying to help. Could you be thinking that everyone your age is immature and the way they are is 'wrong' to try and elevate yourself? Do you have low self esteem? I have felt very alienated myself at times, but in a diffrent way from you. Edited November 19, 2009 by Ross PK
nama Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 I can relate to you and I think Ross makes a good point. I felt the same as you. But who are we to judge what other people do? You live your life how you want to. Don't worry about what anyone else thinks - but thats easy to say. After therapy and 'finding' myself again, I now have more faith in myself. I concentrate on me and do what feels right for myself. As I now feel better about myself I don't care what other people get upto. Thats them. I'm trying to reach out to people, if they reach out to me too then great. If not, there are tons of other people out there. I still feel alienated sometimes but I accept that because that's me at the moment. Have faith xx
Ross PK Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 Nikki, how about trying to find people who are more like yourself? I've always found that when I've associated with people on a regular basis who are nothing like myself it has just made me feel miserable.
Author Nikki Sahagin Posted November 24, 2009 Author Posted November 24, 2009 Hey Ross, thankyou for your imput. Could I ask what makes you see me as snobby and uptight? I'm not so sure about snobby but I am uptight. I've suffered panic disorder and agrophobia so I am usually very tense/nervous. And yes I do suffer with low self-esteem. Have done all my life. I'm not quite sure why either. Maybe over-protected at home. I've always been INCREDIBLY sensitive.
JaggedRoad Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 Hey Ross, thankyou for your imput. Could I ask what makes you see me as snobby and uptight? I'm not so sure about snobby but I am uptight. I've suffered panic disorder and agrophobia so I am usually very tense/nervous. And yes I do suffer with low self-esteem. Have done all my life. I'm not quite sure why either. Maybe over-protected at home. I've always been INCREDIBLY sensitive. You sound just like me
Ross PK Posted November 24, 2009 Posted November 24, 2009 (edited) Could I ask what makes you see me as snobby and uptight? You came across in your post like you look down on young people who like to have fun, like getting drunk, talking about sex and whatever. Edited November 24, 2009 by Ross PK
XKatieX Posted November 30, 2009 Posted November 30, 2009 You came across in your post like you look down on young people who like to have fun, like getting drunk, talking about sex and whatever. I don't think it seemed like she was looking down on them at all. She just doesn't find desire in some of the things people her own age do. Not all people consider drinking "having fun" I can say the same for myself, I have no desire to take part in drinking, smoking, or drugs. But I know many people would disagree with me. I will say it is hard to find people your age that aren't into that kind of stuff, but you just have to find things that you enjoy that others can enjoy with you.
JaggedRoad Posted November 30, 2009 Posted November 30, 2009 I guess we're what some people call an "old soul."
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