bhgirl Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 My husband came back home last night, but I didn't feel as over joyed as I thought I would feel. I was kind of indifferent about it and had a hard time reconnecting with him. I love my husband, but he has hurt me deeply in the past and I am really worried that he may have just come back home because he realized whatever he was doing in the streets was not better than what he had at home. I don't know I am just really questioning his motives for being home. I just didn't get the vibe of him being happy or even much affection from him. Is this just jitters and nervousness because we have been seperated and now need to get to know each other again. Anyone gone through this and has it worked out? Was your marriage stronger after the break up? I have said that I am going to come back into my marriage with a clean slate and let the past be the past. I want to 100% trust him and move forward, but I still have doubts and thoughts of him being with other women in my head. He is friends with plenyt of his ex's on Facebook and it just kills me. Sometimes I think maybe I should just delete him as my friend so I am not obsessing over what he is doing or who he is talking to. How can I stop snooping and move foward with things. Any advice is appreciated and before it is said I want to work on my marriage and I want to stay together. We have history and kids so please don't send leave him posts thanks.
melja Posted November 21, 2009 Posted November 21, 2009 Hi I just read a book that deals with this "why women talk and men walk". The book gives lots of ideas of how to reconnect and build a better relationship. Also it sounds like you are taking your life for granted a little and not living in the present. I think you need to work on yourself and your happiness to give your relationship a better chance. I used to have the same problem, feeling empty when I reached a goal, that indicates a little depression in your life. You need to focus on the good and ignore the bad or work at improving it. It is actually an amazing feat that your husband returned to you and you should realize how much he treasures you and be proud of yourself. You can make this work, there are plenty of tools out there to help make your life a dream life, just keep looking for tools to help you. You can make this marriage better than before so both of you are fulfilled. Good luck.
Author bhgirl Posted November 23, 2009 Author Posted November 23, 2009 Thanks alot for your advice I really have been having a hard time getting past the past. I think sometimes I am just so paranoid that it won't work that I sabbotage things and we end up right back where we were. I pray that things continue to get better. I haven't really looked into any tools to help me cope, but that is a good idea and one I will explore.
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