rp123 Posted November 18, 2009 Posted November 18, 2009 How incredible that in this valley of abject pain and desperation the most profound personal growth takes place. After 70+ days NC I'm still in the torture zone, and think about her all the time. These have been the darkest days of my life (no doubt...) She has another, and cares for him. During our time together I put her on such a golden pedestal and created such an idealistic image of her in my mind. Then I placed my own validation for my self worth/confidence in our relationship. I felt secure in the comfort our relationship provided and I placed my being into it... Now I find that the pedestal I placed her on was a creation of my imagination. And that placing your own value in a relationship is a foolish thing to do... Right now, I stare out of the window alone. I know that it is time to believe in myself for myself.....
USMCHokie Posted November 19, 2009 Posted November 19, 2009 Strength and self-improvement only comes from overcoming adversity... This is why we go through breakups in our life...to learn to put ourselves first and realize that we are defined by what we do when sh*t hits the fan, and not who we're with...and you've got to be able to stand on your own before you can let someone in...those that run and jump from relationship to relationship just to fill the void never learn that...and end up with multiple divorces and general unhappiness...because they were never able to be happy on their own... You're definitely on the right track...
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