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Did I screw it up?


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Posted (edited)

So, there is this girl I've been seeing for the past four weeks and things seem to click between us.

 

We went out for lunch today and had our usual fun, good conversation etc. just normal. At some point at the beginning she said that she's seeing her sister this Friday night and they'll go to the movies together. I assumed that the sister and her husband will stay over the weekend (which turned out to be true). She asked me if I'd like to join them on Saturday for lunch or dinner - that cought me completely off guard! I mean things have been nice between us etc. On the other hand they're going to a funeral service on Sunday so I didn't want to come off as too pushy or clingy. I said that I've to think about it, which I did. I asked her it really is okay with her (she brought it up so my thinking is if she didn't wanna have me around this weekend she wouldn't ask, right?) and she said yes. So I'm going to dinner on Saturday with her and her sister and her brother-in-law.

 

Q: Did I 'fail the test' i.e. should I've declined or choose lunch instead of dinner (even if she said later that dinner works better for her and her guests)?

 

Then we took a walk along the river (which we used to do every time we'd lunch). We started talking about running etc. and she brought up the topic willing to join a running group. I told her about my running groups and said that "I'd love to have her around there."

 

Q: Could I have come off as too clingy?

 

She had to be back at school at 1:45 because she had a meeting with someone. After the walk we were running late a couple of minutes. I usually walked her back to the building she's class in. Today she cut it short and said that she's gonna run off, gave me kiss and a hug and said she's gonna call me regarding dinner... It was really close to the place we usually split and she said she's gonna take a shortcut through one of the buildings. Prior to that she also said that if that'd be a class she would just skip it...

 

Does that sound normal to you guys or have I done something that was not OK?

Edited by Lakeside_runner
Posted

I'm not seeing anything out of the ordinary with any of this, either on her part or yours. Other than the fact that you're here asking about it. THAT appears pretty needy, and a side of you that you're not going to want her to see too much of.

  • Author
Posted

Oh, that I know! It's just I'm really into this girl and I don't want to screw things up by some simple stupid acting.

Posted
She asked me if I'd like to join them on Saturday for lunch or dinner - that cought me completely off guard! I mean things have been nice between us etc. On the other hand they're going to a funeral service on Sunday so I didn't want to come off as too pushy or clingy. I said that I've to think about it, which I did. I asked her it really is okay with her (she brought it up so my thinking is if she didn't wanna have me around this weekend she wouldn't ask, right?) and she said yes. So I'm going to dinner on Saturday with her and her sister and her brother-in-law.

 

Q: Did I 'fail the test' i.e. should I've declined or choose lunch instead of dinner (even if she said later that dinner works better for her and her guests)?

What test do you think you might have failed? Have you been reading one of those things that claims that women will "test" you and you need to respond properly not to "fail" or something?

  • Author
Posted

No... I just called it a 'test'... I don't really think it was any kind of test. I was just faced with the choice - dinner vs lunch vs saying "hey, that's okay - I know you need to spend some time on your own considering the funeral". Judging from what she said and her plans for the weekend option 3 was out of question since it'd be me who makes a drama out of it so it was down to dinner vs lunch and I picked dinner which after all turned out to be a good choice, convenient for both parties.

Posted

You need to relax.

 

As a woman, if I like a man then I want him around my family so they can learn to get along.

 

You should be flattered she asked. It means she likes you.

 

But seriously, you need to relax so her family sees you at your best.

 

Drop a hint when you are hugging her that if she wants you at the funeral you will be there for her. Make it casual and be physically close to her when you say it (not naked in bed/sex).

Posted

I don't see anything wrong here. Stop over thinking it.

Posted
I don't see anything wrong here. Stop over thinking it.

 

 

Stop overthinking every little detail otherwise you will screw it up..

 

be yourself and have fun!

Posted

"Be alone to deal with the funeral"? WTF? When I'm having a hard time, I MOST like to be with a guy I really care about. Having a hug from him can lighten my whole day and make me feel better about things. If I were in her shoes and you HAD said "no" to eating out that day when I asked you to, I would have been a little hurt. So I'd say you made a good decision. Quit overthinking it - you're doing just fine.

Posted

Have you met her sister before? If not, this is the "I want to show my new guy off to my sister" dinner. It means she likes you. This is a good thing; just go with it!

  • Author
Posted

Nope! I haven't met her before :)

 

Yeah, I'm probably overthinking everything and just have to relax.

 

SS - thanks a lot! I didn't think of it that way until now... :)

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