Bronzepen Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Why do some men if not the majority, lose interest/marriage potential or just lose respect to a woman who has had a threesome in her past? Open question-
CostumeSmile Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 I'm not a guy but I have lots of guy friends and I know that most guys would think that a girl who would do such a thing may have no values or lacks morals. Not exactly the type of girl you can bring home to mom. Guys like sleeping w/ "bad" girls but marry the "good" girls.
moimeme Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 LOL He'll get the IP addy banned, too LOL. You'd think people had clues. HEY!!!! Here's someplace to use a GREAT quote I found ROTFL: Oh BK - .... You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance. -- Edward Flaherty
EnigmaXOXO Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 CostumeSmile, You're beautiful, classy, intelligent and confident. Unfortunately, that just makes some folks uncomfortable. And if I were a guy, I might have a crush on you too!
CostumeSmile Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 *blushing* aww chucks......Gracias....
UCFKevin Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Wow...SOMEONE's lonely... Anyway. What CostumeSmile is dead on. It kinda...ruins things in a way. That happened in my last relationship, I found out early on she had a threesome and it was a pretty big turn off.
toots307 Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 You know what I think is really interesting is how excited guys get about being with two women at once. I mean what guy doesn't want a 3some? Yet those are the same guys judging a woman that's had a 3some. If a person can't get past your past then you have no future with that person.
Author Bronzepen Posted December 12, 2003 Author Posted December 12, 2003 Wow! I really struck a chord with BK. Let's turn it around. Hey BK. What do you think of guys who have had threesomes......hmmm?
moimeme Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Oh, goodness. Past is past. People are not cast in stone. A lot of people do things, find out they didn't make a good choice, and never do them again. It's called 'learning the hard way' and one really oughtn't hold that against someone. It's saying "I dislike you now because years ago you were young and foolish"! Besides, people get their jollies in all sorts of fashions. Ideally, they find others who have the same tastes as them. It's not about morality, necessarily. The critical ingredient is that everybody involved is doing it willingly. That it's not your cup of tea doesn't make those who do it bad or wrong - just different.
tphillip Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Interesting. Personally, I wouldn't judge my girlfriend one way or another if I knew they were involved in a threesome. I'd be more interested in what we're going to do together, not what she has done in the past.
UCFKevin Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Well...the past shouldn't matter, but you know damn well if your significant other slept with the "troll" of the area, some hideous person, or did something for money or was in a gangbang, THAT would matter.
toots307 Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Hey costume smile; Have you ever had a 3some? I'd love to know what guy wouldn't be excited by the possibility of having a 3 some with you - or is it a 2 guy one girl 3 some that makes a man think you are not marriage material?? Another thing, as far as bringing someone home to mom goes - where the heck does your sex life come into play? I would think that most people don't let on to their parents how wild or boring or whatever their partner is in bed.
UCFKevin Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 It's just a matter of...not really quality, that's not the word I'm looking for. I dunno, it's stupid to think this way, but to me, a girl with another girl and a guy is a lot better than a girl with two guys. Less things going in other things, you know?
toots307 Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Actually UCFKevin, It may matter to you but maybe not others. There are lots of things that I personally would not accept about about a person - like I'd never date a guy that had pedophile convictions even if he did do his time and pay for the crime. That doesn't mean I don't think that person deserves to be alone but I just have my standards and I think everyone does. That's why I say if there's something about someone's past you can't get past, then you won't work.
toots307 Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 I agree with that Kevin - I would be much more interested in another girl with me and my guy than a guy joining us.
moimeme Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 if your significant other slept with the "troll" of the area, some hideous person, or did something for money or was in a gangbang, THAT would matter. Oh geez! What's it to you if she has had someone you think 'hideous'? Cooties? As for me, theoretically a gangbang or multiple men is interesting. I'm all but completely certain I wouldn't like it in 3D and it won't wound me or ruin my life if I never find out. However this double standard about multiple women vs multiple men is just vestigial homophobia. Remember, sexual preference lies on a continuum, after all. All you need is to find out where you are on the continuum, find a partner in the same place (or someone different who'll go along with you) and then deal with them. No need to cast aspersions on people on other places on that continuum.
toots307 Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Interestingly put moimeme. So many people are so focused on getting a partner and then twisting them into what they want. Why don't we get a partner and accept what they ARE or move on???
CostumeSmile Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Have you ever had a 3some? I'd love to know what guy wouldn't be excited by the possibility of having a 3 some with you - or is it a 2 guy one girl 3 some that makes a man think you are not marriage material?? Another thing, as far as bringing someone home to mom goes - where the heck does your sex life come into play? I would think that most people don't let on to their parents how wild or boring or whatever their partner is in bed. Alright..LOL No, I've never had a 3some and no I don't think a person should be judge by their past either I simply tried to answer the question as to why a man might not look at a woman the same if she did have a 3some. Oh, goodness. Past is past. People are not cast in stone. like moimeme said people make mistakes. And it's not that your going to go telling your parents how this person is in bed but it is something the most men might consider when deciding where he wants to take the relationship. Remember she said "in the past" meaning that this person had a 3some w/ someone else not their present partner, it's very understandable how that could be a turn off to someone specially if they are not into stuff like that.
UCFKevin Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Ugh. So it's homophobia that I wouldn't want a girl I'm seeing to have been with two guys at the same time? Let me tell you something, sister, I'm as far from a homophobe as is possible, believe me. It has NOTHING to do with that whatsoever. My ex had a threesome with two guys and I got past it, but if she was with TEN guys at one time? Yeah, no, don't think I could deal with that, I wouldn't know HOW I'd find out, but that's just a little too demeaning for my own tastes. Continuum...aspersions...ergo! Concordantly! Vis a vis!
moimeme Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 it's very understandable how that could be a turn off Well, it's only understandable if a person assigns moral value to the act and then dislikes the person who engaged in the act. If you think that anybody who would engage in a threesome is some way immoral, then you would think ill of that person. However, that requires that you assign immorality to that act. Not everybody does, you see.
Author Bronzepen Posted December 12, 2003 Author Posted December 12, 2003 Originally posted by CostumeSmile like moimeme said people make mistakes. And it's not that your going to go telling your parents how this person is in bed but it is something the most men might consider when deciding where he wants to take the relationship. Remember she said "in the past" meaning that this person had a 3some w/ someone else not their present partner, it's very understandable how that could be a turn off to someone specially if they are not into stuff like that. But is it really a mistake or just a choice?
moimeme Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Your question illustrates what I just said. To you, to choose to have a threesome implies something unpleasant/undesirable about a person's character.
CostumeSmile Posted December 12, 2003 Posted December 12, 2003 Question for Men concerning a woman's Why do some men if not the majority, lose interest/marriage potential or just lose respect to a woman who has had a threesome in her past? I'm only trying to answer her question not start a moral war....mistake or choice the question is why is she judge for it by future partners in a NEGATIVE way...my answer simply stated possible reasoning. To you, to choose to have a threesome implies something unpleasant/undesirable about a person's character. Yes to me it does...and obviously it must to the person loosing interest in the female who had the 3some. Again, I'm only trying to stay w/ the question at hand.....she never asked if it is wrong or not to have a 3some, that would be a whole new thread.
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