Wings Of Love Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 Hi everyone. Well, a bit of insight might help. My ex boyfriend left me in February after 15 months together. Never really gave me a solid reason for ending it. Has had multiple love interests since then and is nothing like the guy I loved. Finally, despite the fact that I still feel very strongly for this guy, I decided it was in my best interests to go NC and did so 3 months ago. Have not heard from him since, except when he requested my friendship on a social networking site, which I denied. Anyway, for most of the last 9 months I've been an emotional wreck, I cried at the mention of his name, I thought of him constantly and I rarely left the house. Now, however, I get out of the house as often as I can, I laugh and joke with my friends, I can talk about my relationship with him and feel happy instead of breaking down, I don't think about him all the time and when I do I feel grateful for the time we had together. I do miss what we had and I would love to have that back, but I no longer feel as though I can't go on without him. I have met other guys and am attracted to one, but I don't feel about him the way I did when I met my ex. I know I feel very strongly for my ex and if I was given the opportunity to be with him again, I'd take it. But something has changed inside me, I feel more mature and stronger in a way. Do you think I am finally moving on? Or am I just accepting that what we once had is over? Opinions would be great.
threebyfate Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 In order to move on, you have to accept that it's over, so it's part of the same progression towards full healing. Good times are coming your way!
JolliX Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 It's tough to move on when you don't get any answer at all, but you have to think of it this way... whatever answer he would have given you, would that have been what you were looking for? It sounds like the last 9 months have been tough for you, but from how you describe yourself now, you have finally started moving on in a good way. Keep going out with friends, laughing, and all that fun stuff, and eventually he will just be a memmory of your past. I'm glad to hear that you are doing better now.
USMCHokie Posted November 16, 2009 Posted November 16, 2009 I know I feel very strongly for my ex and if I was given the opportunity to be with him again, I'd take it. But something has changed inside me, I feel more mature and stronger in a way. Do you think I am finally moving on? Or am I just accepting that what we once had is over? Opinions would be great. I believe that accepting that a relationship is over and getting over a person are two different things...related, but different... Accepting that what you once had is over usually comes first...realizing that a reconciliation probably will never happen...but getting over someone does not always happen at the same time...although you have acceptance, deep down you still hope for a future with them... Completely moving on requires both...where you get over the relationship itself...and you get over the ex as a person...but I feel that for the second step, you need a catalyst...a new person to fill that spot in your heart...otherwise, your mind will still associate love with your ex...and you can never truly get over that ex...
9Lives Posted November 16, 2009 Posted November 16, 2009 I had to accept what has happen...realize I cant change it...then start working on moving on. I write alot to myself all the time. It helps me to remember it is over.
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