Why cant I get a date?

[The Way I Am]

I'd avoid including "single", "looking" or "love" in your username. I think something that includes planes, flying or pilot is good, but I'm a little biased because my guy just got his license.

 

Do you actually fly jets? If not, don't use jet pilot. When I picture a jet pilot, I think of old airline pilots.

[Lost-n-confused]

I'd avoid including "single", "looking" or "love" in your username. I think something that includes planes, flying or pilot is good, but I'm a little biased because my guy just got his license.

 

Do you actually fly jets? If not, don't use jet pilot. When I picture a jet pilot, I think of old airline pilots.

 

I want to be a jet pilot. I also like Jetskis. So JetPilot just goes together.

[Lost-n-confused]

I smell bs

 

I think hes just f'ing with everyone now

 

I so wish I was. I really wish I was. If I had a date you thing id waste my time here?

[metaphors]

You're cute enough, sure.

 

But from your posts I get the impression you may be a bit self-absorbed.

 

Hiding behind the shy-guy image, etc.

 

I'd also be willing to bet you're insanely picky.

 

I'm sure plenty of girls have shown plenty of interest. How many have been up to your standards? Judging by the standards you've set for yourself...I'm guessing 0.

 

When you talk about your interests...you list things like: going to the gym, jet skis, etc.

 

Those things give the impression that you're an air-headed jock.

 

Show us something deeper.

 

Attractive men who lay it on thick are creepy. I'd think you just wanted laid, or that you're being facetious. Either way it's bad.

 

Do an extra curricular activity that YOU like. Don't do dancing, horseback riding, etc. Do something that interests you intellectually. Whether it is a cooking class, group guitar lessons, something that YOU really like.

 

If you see a girl there who likes the same thing...talk to her. Even if she's hideous to you, talk to her.

 

Get your confidence in small doses.

 

Stay away from behaving like characters from a romance novel, or a movie. Be real.

[The Way I Am]

I want to be a jet pilot. I also like Jetskis. So JetPilot just goes together.

 

Feel free to disagree (it's your username after all), but I think your username should describe what you are, not what you want to be. Maybe this is silly, but having it reflect what you want to be seems less adult. More like a kid saying what he wants to be when he grows up.

 

What about Jetskiing Pilot? Or Pilot Jetski. I know that last one doesn't make total sense, but to me, the most interesting things are somewhat obscure...

 

But then, I don't think people focus too much on the username itself. I just tend to over analyze things.

[Lost-n-confused]

In all honesty I have no problem talking to women I'm not attracted to. The gym, jetsking, flying all those things are who I am. I did dance lessons which was completely out of my comfort zone. I ended up liking it a lot tho. As for taking classes I really don't have time for that kinda of stuff. When it comes to classroom activities if I'm not attracted to someone I usally just do my thing and leave. Even then talk to women who im not attracted to is no different then talking to any other man. I see women all the time I find attractive and yes I am picky but I feel im a great catch and everyone I know tells me that. That's why I believe it.

 

Today must of messaged like 20 girls between plentyoffish.com and match.com.

 

Edit: I must admit I'm very desperate for some companionship. Up until a few months ago I never dated anyone and didn't know what I was missing. Not that I got a taste I'm addicted. How do I stop feeling so desperate?

Edited November 19, 2009 by Lost-n-confused

[Lost-n-confused]

Let me know what you think of my profiles? So far I have had no response to either plentyoffish or match.

 

Plentyoffish.com

 

I am a very health oriented person. I workout a lot and enjoy a healthy diet to keep my body healthy and fit. I very much enjoy the company of those who do the same. I enjoy stand up jetsking and also enjoy riding the sitdowns as well. I also love Martial arts. I enjoy dancing and love anything from ballroom dancing to salsa. I enjoy do-it-yourself projects and maintain my own car and jetskis. Not only because it’s cheaper but it’s also a lot of fun. I enjoy going to museums and viewing art. I enjoy the performing arts as well. I also love to go out on the town but also lover a quite night at home relaxing watching movies. I also love to cook, its part of a healthy diet and a lot of fun too.

 

My goal in life is to be a pilot. I hold a commercial license and I'm currently working on my flight instructor certification so I can start my aviation career. I received an AS degree in professional aviation and a BS degree in environmental science. My dream is to be a pilot for the excitement, travel, money and prestige.

 

I'm a very outgoing person. I'm always up to try something new and I’m constantly looking for excitement and challenges. I do enjoy a relaxing evening at home but going out and living life is what I'm all about. I’m not too much about going to the scene or clubs while I enjoy going and enjoy dancing I mainly like to outdoor activities. I'm always keeping myself busy. I'm always doing something to improve my mind and my body. I’m a very caring and compassionate person and not looking to play games. When I like someone I like to show it and be straight forward. I’m looking to meet someone for dating and a romantic relationship.

 

I enjoy music a lot but I'm not the type to listen to an Ipod and repeat the same songs over and over. I enjoy listening to the radio and love the randomness of it. As for types of music I enjoy alternative, classic rock, r&b, techno and jazz. I like jazz a lot because it can be anything from something smooth and sexy to something wild. I also play the guitar a little as well.

 

Match.com

 

I am a very outgoing person who loves adventure, physical challenges and thrills. I work out regularly in the gym, where I tone my body and keep slim. I spend my free time going out with friends, riding jet skis and doing various water sports. Aviation is my passion and that is where I will end up making myself successful. I still take college courses to expand my mind even though I already have a college degree. Got to keep your brain in shape too!

So, sounds like I’m a pretty fast paced guy right? Nope. When it comes to romance and relationships I like it slow. I like to get to know the person I’m dating and make sure that the feelings are genuine. I am not the type to rush into anything. Look before you leap, right? My ideal date isn’t going to movies, although I do enjoy them. I like something simple like going on a lunch date and maybe taking a walk on the beach trying to get to know who the other person is.

I love traveling and have been out of the country many times. I have seen much of the US and some of the world which has made me very open minded, so I generally like people who are open minded as well. I like people who aren’t afraid to express themselves and who can openly and clearly communicate. No games here. So, if you are looking for someone who values a healthy body and mind, someone who loves to go out and have an adventurous time, travel, or just kick back and relax and talk, I’m that guy.

[The Way I Am]

I'm trying to resist the urge to really edit the whole thing, because I love editing.

 

PoF:

 

1. Not that major, but "workout" is a noun. You used it as a verb. "Work out" is correct in your context.

 

2. Move the exercise and workout stuff closer to the bottom or get rid of it entirely. When it's the first thing a woman reads, it can give a bad impression. If you've got pics on the profile, you don't need to tell them you exercise and are fit. They can see that. I suggest just doing away with the gym wording in the PoF profile. The wording at the close of the match.com one is a good way to end.

 

3. I suggest moving the contents of paragraph 3 up to the top (especially the first 2 sentences). "I'm a very outgoing person. I'm always up to try something new and I’m constantly looking for excitement and challenges."

 

4. You can just say you like jetskiing. I doubt most people differentiate between stand up and sit down jetskis. Keep it short.

 

5. "I enjoy do-it-yourself projects and maintain my own car and jetskis. Not only because it’s cheaper but it’s also a lot of fun." -- How about just "I have a lot of fun with do-it-yourself projects, especially maintaining my car and jetskis." Don't use the word "cheap".

 

6. That's a lot of repetition of the word "I enjoy", "I very much enjoy", "I also love" in that first paragraph. Makes it a little hard to read through. If you want to list a bunch of things you like, just make it a bullet list.

 

match.com:

 

1. Again, gym stuff.

 

2. "My ideal date isn’t going to movies, although I do enjoy them. I like something simple like going on a lunch date and maybe taking a walk on the beach trying to get to know who the other person is." -- Change the wording. I first thought it said "My ideal date is going to the movies" until the follow up "although". Maybe say, "My ideal date is something simple like..."

 

3. Maybe just a personal preference, but I'm always suspicious of people who say "no games" or "no drama". I find a lot of the people saying things like "I hate games" are the biggest game players. Not always true, but like I said, makes me suspicious.

Edited November 19, 2009 by The Way I Am

[metaphors]

When the first thing you put in a profile is "I love to work out and I am a very health oriented person"

 

It reads like this: I am going to be very judgmental of your physical fitness level and overall appearance.

 

Even the most attractive girls don't want to be "judged".

 

Again, I assert that your problem is NOT that you're shy, it is that you're picky.

 

You don't have problems finding/meeting/talking to women. You just have problems finding/meeting/talk to women that are up to your standards.

 

Ms. Perfect doesn't need the internet to get a guy, she's taken. Time to look beneath the surface.

[Enema]

Also in POF:

 

"I also love to go out on the town but also lover a quite night at home relaxing watching movies."

[Lost-n-confused]

Thanks for the help here are the updates.

 

Plentyoffish

 

I'm a very outgoing person. I'm always up to try something new and I’m constantly looking for excitement and challenges. I do enjoy a relaxing evening at home but going out and living life is what I'm all about. I’m not too much about going to the scene or clubs while I enjoy going and enjoy dancing I mainly like to outdoor activities. I'm always keeping myself busy. I'm always doing something to improve my mind and my body. I’m a very caring and compassionate person and not looking to play games. When I like someone I like to show it and be straight forward. I’m looking to meet someone for dating and a romantic relationship.

 

I am a very health oriented person. I enjoy working out and keep a healthy diet. I very much enjoy the company of those who value the same. I enjoy jetsking. I also love Martial arts. I enjoy dancing and love anything from ballroom dancing to salsa. I have a lot of fun with do-it-yourself projects, especially maintaining my car and jetskis. I enjoy going to museums and viewing art. I enjoy the performing arts as well. I also love to go out on the town but also love a quiet night at home relaxing watching movies. I also love to cook, its part of a healthy diet and a lot of fun too.

 

My goal in life is to be a pilot. I hold a commercial license and I'm currently working on my flight instructor certification so I can start my aviation career. I received an AS degree in professional aviation and a BS degree in environmental science. My dream is to be a pilot for the excitement, travel, money and prestige.

 

I enjoy music a lot but I'm not the type to listen to an Ipod and repeat the same songs over and over. I enjoy listening to the radio and love the randomness of it. As for types of music I enjoy alternative, classic rock, r&b, techno and jazz. I like jazz a lot because it can be anything from something smooth and sexy to something wild. I also play the guitar a little as well.

 

So, if you are looking for someone who values a healthy body and mind, someone who loves to go out and have an adventurous time, travel, or just kick back and relax and talk, I’m that guy.

 

Match.com

 

I am a very outgoing person who loves adventure, physical challenges and thrills. I spend my free time going out with friends, riding jet skis and doing various water sports. Aviation is my passion and that is where I will end up making myself successful. I still take college courses to expand my mind even though I already have a college degree. Got to keep your brain in shape too!

So, sounds like I’m a pretty fast paced guy right? Nope. When it comes to romance and relationships I like it slow. I like to get to know the person I’m dating and make sure that the feelings are genuine. I am not the type to rush into anything. Look before you leap, right? My ideal date is something simple like going on a lunch date and maybe taking a walk on the beach trying to get to know who the other person is.

I love traveling and have been out of the country many times. I have seen much of the US and some of the world which has made me very open minded, so I generally like people who are open minded as well. I like people who aren’t afraid to express themselves and who can openly and clearly communicate. No games here. So, if you are looking for someone who values a healthy body and mind, someone who loves to go out and have an adventurous time, travel, or just kick back and relax and talk, I’m that guy.

[The Way I Am]

Sounds good to me. Now we just wait and see if it helps!

 

I noticed one thing this time I didn't before. It's kind of iffy.

 

"My dream is to be a pilot for the excitement, travel, money and prestige."

 

That might turn off/signal a red flag to down-to-earth girls, the ones who don't like when guys brag about their income. Maybe take out the word "money".

[Enema]

I can't get through the first paragraph without yawning, but I still found something that doesn't read well:

 

I’m not too much about going to the scene or clubs while I enjoy going and enjoy dancing I mainly like to outdoor activities.

[Lost-n-confused]

I can't get through the first paragraph without yawning, but I still found something that doesn't read well:

 

How do I spice it up then?

[Lish]

OP, you are gorgeous.

[VeveCakes]

The whole thing reads like speech. You need more personality in there. You also need to put something in there about the kind of women you are attracted to, and NOT the physical stuff.

 

The best profiles are short, simple, true and informative.

[Ross PK]

Too much writing IMO, it's a really big wall of text. Just write the main things/most interesting things and get straight to the point.

[espec10001]

OP, while some of the female advice isn't bad perse, you can't go through life feeling like you NEED a female. Any time a female senses desperation or neediness they run for the hills.

 

The truth is you never NEED a female, if you have food, clothing, shelter, family, friends, interests, then you don't NEED one. You are coming off like you NEED one, and that is not attractive. The worst thing you can do is change your mind with whatever a girl is telling you, like the girls on here are. You gotta be yourself and nobody else, no matter what a girl says.

 

I am confident that you will meet the right girl at the right place at the right time, and things will just click. Some people it happens at a young age some people it happens later, but it will happen. There is no one size fits all method or way of living for everyone. So just be self assured that the right lady will come along and it will just happen naturally, not forced or contrived.

[Lost-n-confused]

OP, you are gorgeous.

 

Thank you

[Lost-n-confused]

Ive spend 24 years alone. Its safe to say I don't NEED anyone I WANT someone.

 

Ill try to cut down my profile and talk more about what Im looking for I guess.

[Sam Spade]

I can't get through the first paragraph without yawning, but I still found something that doesn't read well:

 

Same here...

Very lame profile - a bowl of oatmeal is more exiting.

First, it needs to be MUCH shorter.

2nd, throw in some fun stuff in there. Doesn't need to be risque, but at least a bit off beat...

 

Here's my public service for the day --> use this as a tag - line/title for your profile:

 

"I look good in tight pants".

 

If you can't get laid with all the sage advice that has been dispensed so far, I will hunt you down and slap you around .

Edited November 19, 2009 by Sam Spade

[Sam Spade]

OP, you are gorgeous.

 

he's gorgeous indeed (i think it moved!), but he can't rough you up the way you need . Which is a shame; He's got the claws and he can't kill the bunny :laugh:

[Lost-n-confused]

Ill update my profile later and really cut it down and seem mysterious.

 

Here is a photo I took yesterday. The others were about 3-4 months old.

 

[Lish]

he's gorgeous indeed (i think it moved!), but he can't rough you up the way you need . Which is a shame; He's got the claws and he can't kill the bunny :laugh:

 

:bunny:

 

& what makes you think I need to be roughed up?

[torranceshipman]

Woah....are you serious? You are gorgeous! Not only great looking, but you sound like you have a great personality too. AND you can dance! Nice...