NoIDidn't Posted November 25, 2009 Posted November 25, 2009 Oddly enough I also blame the government, although I think the culprit is the public school system. How else to explain your apalling inability to discern the rather simple distinction between Constitutional restrictions on government powers when it comes to criminal prosection and citizen monitoring, and what goes on between two partners inside a relationship. You likely also imagine that a party cannot charge a partner with infidelity without first obtaining a jury indictment, followed by a trial decided by their peers. Followed by a final appeal to the Supreme Court and reversible by Executive Pardon. But Im also conflicted. Because then I reread your last paragraph, and thought it may not be the schools at all, and just further evidence of why "Drugs are bad." This post cracked me up! LOL.
JaneInVegas Posted November 26, 2009 Posted November 26, 2009 Also, ADF, I think the old adage is true: People with nothing to hide...hide nothing! AMEN! Couldn't have said it better myself
JaneInVegas Posted November 26, 2009 Posted November 26, 2009 That's how Josef Stalin looked at it. I guess some people just don't understand that taking it upon yourself to violate another's privacy is no better than slapping them in the face. Even if they do no major harm, they are affronts to dignity. I have never seen someone so robustly compare marriage to politics before. Interesting ... and yet so totally pointless
JaneInVegas Posted November 26, 2009 Posted November 26, 2009 This topic has gotten totally removed from my original point. Which was this: why would people rather snoop and spy on their significant other than confront them openly when there is a problem? I wasn't talking about government control or even marital intimacy. I was talking about how meant people--especially younger people--have lost all sense of privacy, and think nothing of spying on others, or even being spied on by others. Can we get back to that? Well let's see ... I confronted him about 20 times and all I got was, "You're crazy!", "You're imagining things!", "What the hell are you talking about?", "I haven't talked to her in almost 2 years!" etc etc etc Confrontation does NOTHING. Once I showed him his own cell phone records, suddenly I wasn't a "crazy over-imaginative bitch" anymore. You do the math.
mem11363 Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 Jane, You nailed this so well. ADF, I actually blame the government for not doing a better job of protecting infants from the effects of lead paint and phthalates as you likely ingested a surplus of one, the other or both early in life. As a consequence you seem unable to grasp the following very simple premise: Someone who has egregiously breached trust in a relationship and not immediately confessed is at core dishonest. So asking them if they are cheating is worse then pointless - it is counterproductive as they will deny it and also be more careful in the future. Well let's see ... I confronted him about 20 times and all I got was, "You're crazy!", "You're imagining things!", "What the hell are you talking about?", "I haven't talked to her in almost 2 years!" etc etc etc Confrontation does NOTHING. Once I showed him his own cell phone records, suddenly I wasn't a "crazy over-imaginative bitch" anymore. You do the math.
Slainte Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 Hey, easy on the Stalin references, I'm a Commie. But really if you've got nothing to hide then you shouldn't have privacy/secrecy issues. If you have something to hide, then stop bitching and hide it! Obviously as someone well versed in activist security culture, I always delete text messages, call records, email records, shred hard copies, use proxies for most online activities, and use digital shredder for overwriting hard drives. At this stage it has become second nature, so if I was an adulterer I'd be a nightmare to track.
Woggle Posted November 27, 2009 Posted November 27, 2009 We sadly have a society of people who feel that they have a right to butt in everybody's business. The concept of individual rights and personal freedom is lost on what is supposed to be a free country. The war on drugs is a huge start but the general moral policing that existed in the 70s and 80s as a response to the 60s counterculture has created the big brother society we have today. Instead of letting people decide for themselves what they want to watch, listen to or put in their own bodies the government set to become the moral police and try to stifle anything that did not fit in with so called mainstream values. As far as snooping in a relationship is concerned I can understand where it comes from but if people feel the need to do that they don't have much of a relationship in the first place. A woman has one chance to have my full trust and if she breaks that trust she is out of my life. I don't have time to be suspicious with somebody like that.
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