andy.macca Posted November 14, 2009 Posted November 14, 2009 If ever there is a girl I like I tend to ignore her, why? I play social soccer with a girl and I can't help but just ignore her. I'll say something I think is funny in her presence but it'll always be to someone else. Last week I decided to say something to her so I looked at her and re only thing that came to mind was "your eye lashes are long" I wisely held that in.
alphamale Posted November 14, 2009 Posted November 14, 2009 If ever there is a girl I like I tend to ignore her, why? because you're scared and lack self-confidence with girls. this should improve with age and experience. its normal to be nervous around someone that you are attracted to. the key is to be able to control it so that the other party doesn't notice. i find that booze helps a lot too.
Author andy.macca Posted November 14, 2009 Author Posted November 14, 2009 Alcohol works wonders too. To the point where I actually have a problem, trying to move away from that.
justforfun Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 i find that booze helps a lot too. Oy..stop it and behave yourself!
justforfun Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 Alcohol works wonders too. To the point where I actually have a problem, trying to move away from that. Don't take any notice of him..LOL Alcohol is not the answer. You need to be learning how to initiate conversation with women. You can't do that drunk. Silly as it may sound you could rehearse a few things you might say to her. If you get a chance then walk alongside her when you are talking to her. Must be a few occasions during practice or something where you are both spending time looking at something else. That might help to avoid some of the awkwardness. And, fwiw, if she does like you then the eyelash thing would have been a lovely thing to say.
alphamale Posted November 15, 2009 Posted November 15, 2009 Alcohol is not the answer. You need to be learning how to initiate conversation with women. You can't do that drunk. i didn't say "drunk"...i meant that two or three drinks may loosen one up a bit and enable easier conversation with the opposite sex. i wouldn't recommend trying to meet women after having ten beers...
Author andy.macca Posted November 16, 2009 Author Posted November 16, 2009 Don't take any notice of him..LOL Alcohol is not the answer. You need to be learning how to initiate conversation with women. You can't do that drunk. Silly as it may sound you could rehearse a few things you might say to her. If you get a chance then walk alongside her when you are talking to her. Must be a few occasions during practice or something where you are both spending time looking at something else. That might help to avoid some of the awkwardness. And, fwiw, if she does like you then the eyelash thing would have been a lovely thing to say. Ok, well I have a game tonight so I'll see how that goes. She likes to complain about the ref but I haven't been able to come up with anything for that. I think the problem also is my mind clouds as I feel I have to come up with something good. I don't think I'll dive straight in with compliments though. i didn't say "drunk"...i meant that two or three drinks may loosen one up a bit and enable easier conversation with the opposite sex. i wouldn't recommend trying to meet women after having ten beers... At least after ten beers I feel like I'm being successful
justforfun Posted November 16, 2009 Posted November 16, 2009 i didn't say "drunk"...i meant that two or three drinks may loosen one up a bit and enable easier conversation with the opposite sex. i wouldn't recommend trying to meet women after having ten beers... I know I was just joking with you. But I do stand by my point that he shouldn't be using alcohol to 'loosen' up. At this point in his life he needs to be using his own resources and learning how to get past this initial uncomfortable feeling. It's a learning process that he has to master or he will be like it for the rest of his life. Bloody alcoholics should be banned from this board :laugh:
Author andy.macca Posted November 16, 2009 Author Posted November 16, 2009 Last night didn't go that well in terms of talking to her, even though I often stood next to her. The only time we talked was when she told me what to do since we were playing on the same wing and I've never played soccer before. Might just wait a while I think. Maybe I'll get more comfortable around her with time. Or I won't. It's not like I'm losing anything.
justforfun Posted November 17, 2009 Posted November 17, 2009 Last night didn't go that well in terms of talking to her, even though I often stood next to her. The only time we talked was when she told me what to do since we were playing on the same wing and I've never played soccer before. Might just wait a while I think. Maybe I'll get more comfortable around her with time. Or I won't. It's not like I'm losing anything. Way to go!! You did get more comfortable!! You stood next to her, you talked to her. And you did it at your own pace. No need to wait a while. Carry on with it. That's the only way you will continue to get more comfortable. If you don't then...Yes you will be losing something. This is a great opportunity to learn. An opportunity to gain some confidence. Find out what works for you. Keep going!! I think you did brilliantly! (I think you're right though...best not to mention the eyelashes right now )
Author andy.macca Posted November 17, 2009 Author Posted November 17, 2009 (edited) Well by talking I mean she yelled 'mark him' 'stay on him' 'run the ball up' all in a nice helpful way though. Was hardly conversation. As an aside, she has one year of high school left. I am two years into uni. Is that wierd? When I say it like that it sounds worse than me being 20 and her 17. Edited November 17, 2009 by andy.macca Clarification
justforfun Posted November 17, 2009 Posted November 17, 2009 Stop over-analyzing. (Just joking, I think it's great that you are on here asking all these questions). By spending more time with her you will become more relaxed with her. It's happening already. And you will feel confident to have a conversation with her. I don't know about the age thing. I'm European and we accept larger age gaps than seems to be the case here. 17 and 20 would be appropriate to me. But seems to be different here. Maybe something to do with age of consent usually being 18 here :lmao::lmao: and where I am from it's 16. Well by talking I mean she yelled 'mark him' 'stay on him' 'run the ball up' all in a nice helpful way though. Was hardly conversation. As an aside, she has one year of high school left. I am two years into uni. Is that wierd? When I say it like that it sounds worse than me being 20 and her 17.
Author andy.macca Posted November 17, 2009 Author Posted November 17, 2009 Age of consent is 16 in new Zealand. I'm not too worried about the difference. Just wondered if it would be frowned upon.
justforfun Posted November 17, 2009 Posted November 17, 2009 Me bad. I just assumed you were in US. I can't answer that one for you. You'll have to find that out there.
Author andy.macca Posted November 18, 2009 Author Posted November 18, 2009 Me bad. I just assumed you were in US. I can't answer that one for you. You'll have to find that out there. Oh no, I wasn't asking for a legal thing or even really a cultural thing. Just your opinion and I think that is what you gave. So, no bad. Good :-)
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