Is it ok to just have oral sex with your boyfriend and not full intercourse?

[MissJoness]

This is normal.there are a lot of couples who prefer oral to intercourse

[sedgwick]

Sex just scares me, i dont like that it hurts, and just the in-out motion doesnt excite me so i dont see the point in doing it.

 

This makes me sad! There is soooo much more to sex than "the in-out motion," but the only way to learn about that is to experiment. I'm not saying to go outside your comfort zone, but for your own sake, I hope you'll allow yourself to slowly learn about everything sex can be. It sounds like you have a very understanding and patient partner, and I'm sure he'd be honored to go on that journey with you!

 

Have you explored penetration on your own, with your fingers or small toys? Masturbation is a great way to learn what you like and what DOESN'T hurt you. It's absolutely normal for sex to hurt the first couple of times, especially if those times are far apart, but it DOES get much, much better! And one of the best ways to ease yourself into it physically and psychologically is to explore your body alone, with no worries about pleasing or displeasing your partner.

 

I think it's completely normal to find sex a bit scary and physically uncomfortable at first! I certainly did. But don't let that stop you from learning about your own pleasure and discovering a deeper level of physical intimacy with your boyfriend.

 

Have you gone to a gynecologist and spoken to her about your issues? Have you talked over birth control? Just having some reassurance that your anatomy is normal and that there are many contraceptive options should bring you comfort and help you relax in the bedroom!

 

Oh, and, the next time you try it -- get on top!

Edited November 19, 2009 by sedgwick

[MissJoness]

This makes me sad! There is soooo much more to sex than "the in-out motion," but the only way to learn about that is to experiment. I'm not saying to go outside your comfort zone, but for your own sake, I hope you'll allow yourself to slowly learn about everything sex can be. It sounds like you have a very understanding and patient partner, and I'm sure he'd be honored to go on that journey with you!

 

Have you explored penetration on your own, with your fingers or small toys? Masturbation is a great way to learn what you like and what DOESN'T hurt you. It's absolutely normal for sex to hurt the first couple of times, especially if those times are far apart, but it DOES get much, much better! And one of the best ways to ease yourself into it physically and psychologically is to explore your body alone, with no worries about pleasing or displeasing your partner.

 

I think it's completely normal to find sex a bit scary and physically uncomfortable at first! I certainly did. But don't let that stop you from learning about your own pleasure and discovering a deeper level of physical intimacy with your boyfriend.

 

Have you gone to a gynecologist and spoken to her about your issues? Have you talked over birth control? Just having some reassurance that your anatomy is normal and that there are many contraceptive options should bring you comfort and help you relax in the bedroom!

 

Oh, and, the next time you try it -- get on top!

The only way you can have sex is for the penis to go in and out

 

Now, I had the same problem as the OP and did the dildos thing and it still didn't work. It felt just as unpleasureable as having sex with a guy. And not to mention boring and tiring

 

I had a friend who said that all she and her husband did was oral sex. They just liked it better