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Not just a red flag, but a dealbreaker


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Posted
Dealbreakers for me:

 

Homophobia. If you have a thing against gay people and I find out on the first date, I will probably make fun of you for the rest of the date, then go to thd "bathroom" and leave you with the bill. You are scum.

 

Bush supporter. The George W. variety. Also Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin fans.

 

A girl who spends most of her time on nights and weekends at bars or nightclubs. I won't go to those places anymore and pretend I enjoy it just to try and meet people. I'm done with that scene.

 

Now, some dealmakers for me are as follows:

 

Someone said it before, but non natural hair colors are sexy as hell. I just have to approach a girl and introduce myself if they have the guts to have hair like that.

 

Intelligence. Nothing like a woman who can kick my ass in an intelligent debate, or a woman with a PHD. I am thoroughly disappointed with the women that feel they need to act like they are dumb to impress guys. You girls need to quit that.

 

And finally, bipolar disorder. Something about it just makes me weak in the knees and stiff in my pants. Yummy.

 

 

(1) While I dont' approve of homophobia, you're basically committing a fraud and stealing from someone if you do that. Homophobia isn't criminal, but your behavior would be.

 

(2) Bipolar is a dealmaker to you? Perhaps because of the manic phase sex? You are sick.

Posted
(1) While I dont' approve of homophobia, you're basically committing a fraud and stealing from someone if you do that. Homophobia isn't criminal, but your behavior would be.

 

(2) Bipolar is a dealmaker to you? Perhaps because of the manic phase sex? You are sick.

 

I was just kidding about the bipolar part. But I always love to listen to people who have interesting stories, and I'm sure a person with bi-polar would have a different view on things, so I would be attracted to that.

 

But not if you are homophobic. In my opinion, homophobes are scum. In all other aspects of my life I am extremely tolerant, but not with homophobes. Ignorance, stupidity, and hatred all rolled into one.

  • Author
Posted
I was just kidding about the bipolar part. But I always love to listen to people who have interesting stories, and I'm sure a person with bi-polar would have a different view on things, so I would be attracted to that.

 

But not if you are homophobic. In my opinion, homophobes are scum. In all other aspects of my life I am extremely tolerant, but not with homophobes. Ignorance, stupidity, and hatred all rolled into one.

 

 

Maybe they have religious beliefs, or think many homosexuals engage in irresponsible risky sexual behavior, which in many cases is true, hence the very high HIV infection rates. Honestly, how many homophobic women have you actually met?

Posted
Maybe they have religious beliefs, or think many homosexuals engage in irresponsible risky sexual behavior, which in many cases is true, hence the very high HIV infection rates. Honestly, how many homophobic women have you actually met?

 

If a person's religious beliefs are telling to discriminate against a group of people because of their sexual orientation, then I don't want to have anything to do with them. That is ignorance. The gays I hang out with are some of the nicest people I have ever met, and not wanting equal rights for them is a crime in my opinion.

 

And one of the most successful relationships I have ever seen was between two 60 year old gay men. They both had extremely different lifestyles, one was a bodybuilder and the other was a rotund couch potato. They also disagreed on whether or not to have children, which for the majority of relationships is a huge, huge deal. But they were still together and madly in love, even at 60.

 

And I have met a few homophobic women in my times, but I didn't stick around to find out more about them. It's a deal breaker for me, so once I found out, I was gone.

Posted
thing is TMG, it wasnt something that i had put in the 'dealbreaker' category.

it was just a reaction to something that i hadnt anticipated would affect me like that.

 

if i had been really into the guy then it probably would have been different, but neither of us were that bothered so it didnt really matter.

Ok, so you weren't really into the guy. That does make it different and it seems that it was not all about the bathroom thing (being not that into the guy is a reason upon itself).

 

I'd be very upset if something of this sort destroyed would be all it takes to ruin a good relationship. Now if there's a pattern of many things, then it wans't a good relationship to being with.

Posted
Ok, so you weren't really into the guy. That does make it different and it seems that it was not all about the bathroom thing (being not that into the guy is a reason upon itself).

 

I'd be very upset if something of this sort destroyed would be all it takes to ruin a good relationship. Now if there's a pattern of many things, then it wans't a good relationship to being with.

 

 

Rest assured If i had really liked him it wouldnt have been a dealbreaker. :)

 

the story is however valid in highlighting how people can have strange reasons for going off people.

  • Author
Posted
If a person's religious beliefs are telling to discriminate against a group of people because of their sexual orientation, then I don't want to have anything to do with them. That is ignorance. The gays I hang out with are some of the nicest people I have ever met, and not wanting equal rights for them is a crime in my opinion.

 

And one of the most successful relationships I have ever seen was between two 60 year old gay men. They both had extremely different lifestyles, one was a bodybuilder and the other was a rotund couch potato. They also disagreed on whether or not to have children, which for the majority of relationships is a huge, huge deal. But they were still together and madly in love, even at 60.

 

And I have met a few homophobic women in my times, but I didn't stick around to find out more about them. It's a deal breaker for me, so once I found out, I was gone.

 

 

So you don't sound very tolerant of opinions that differ from yours.

Posted
So you don't sound very tolerant of opinions that differ from yours.

 

The only thing I'm intolerant of is intolerance. And homophobia.

  • Author
Posted
The only thing I'm intolerant of is intolerance. And homophobia.

 

 

I have no problem with homosexuals. i ahve a serious problem with transsexuals and how society enables them.

Posted

Here are some of mine:

 

1. Religious

2. Vegan

3. Updates their status on facebook every 5 minutes

Posted
Rest assured If i had really liked him it wouldnt have been a dealbreaker. :)

 

the story is however valid in highlighting how people can have strange reasons for going off people.

When I think about it I have my dealbreakers too and some of them may well sound silly to others.

 

I may be a little too sensitive about this stuff, being afraid one wrong move will ruin a nice relationship.

Posted

1) Hangs out with ex girlfriends

2) Extremely religious

3) Shorter than me (sorry, but it's true)

4) Jobless (it's okay if they're RECENTLY jobless and LOOKING, though...and by LOOKING I mean actively, I don't mean playing video games and living off unemployment for 20 months)

5) Pro-life

6) Creationist

Posted

 

The amount of hatred being spewed here towards environmentalists, feminists, and vegetarians really baffles me. Why would anyone get so outraged that a person wants to leave the planet in better shape than she found it, be respected even though she has a vagina, and eschew eating animals? The anger directed at these pacifist pursuits confounds me.

 

Maybe i can help...I have a friend like this..not really a friend, but I kind of like(d) her, but she's just too in your face w/her vegan/animal rights stuff..maybe that's what turns people off... I respect her for her choices, but she's sooo evangelical (and ever so slightly superior) about it. If she were 15 it would be cutely annoying:rolleyes:, but she's 50 and it just pisses off anyone who isn't also a vegan hunt saboteuse...It's like her whole identity is wrapped up in her politically-correct belief system and the rest of us are beneath her. It's a bit irritating....

 

DEALBREAKERS:

This was a bit hard, maybe i'm too tolerant...Most men I've dated are not completely "politically correct"... But neither am i so...here goes...

 

  1. Liars, dishonesty can't work
  2. Junkies (Hard drugs like Heroin, crack, etc..:eek:) Functioning heavy drinkers? Well, we've all been there, eh?
  3. No money, job, ambition (no interest from me!)
  4. Unintelligent, stupid or uneducated..I like someone I can talk to who's clever/witty and dazzles me with his intellect, insight and/or knowledge...:cool:
  5. Oh yeah, bad kisser and no good in bed:o

Posted
The amount of hatred being spewed here towards environmentalists, feminists, and vegetarians really baffles me. Why would anyone get so outraged that a person wants to leave the planet in better shape than she found it, be respected even though she has a vagina, and eschew eating animals? The anger directed at these pacifist pursuits confounds me.

Because people like that tend to be loud, annoying, in your face, overly opinionated, intolerant of anyone who disagrees with them, and often downright nuts. Does that answer your question?

Posted
what trait is an ABSOLUTE dealbreak for you?

 

Daddy issues.

 

I can't tolerate drug use, or a woman who's not into oral sex. I can't really think of anything else at the moment, but I'm sure there are some nutty things I won't put up with.

Posted
So you're pro-death I take it?

 

Nope. I'm pro-women's rights.

Posted
Nope. I'm pro-women's rights.

 

I'm a little compromised about what age we shouldn't be able to kill the defective or unwanted ones. I'm toying with age 16, but many people think they're too able to defend themselves by that age.

  • Author
Posted
I'm a little compromised about what age we shouldn't be able to kill the defective or unwanted ones. I'm toying with age 16, but many people think they're too able to defend themselves by that age.

 

 

I think you should be able to kill children until they are able to feed themselves, since clearly they are dependent upon the mother.

Posted
I think you should be able to kill children until they are able to feed themselves, since clearly they are dependent upon the mother.

 

I guess until they can fend for themselves is a good limit, but I suppose the provider should be able to decide, not always the mother. But not believing that wouldn't be a dealbreaker for me.

Posted

That's interesting. I didn't know an under-developed fetus was considered a "child". Learn something new every day.

 

If I wanted rich religious men to tell me what I can and can't do with my own body, I'd live in Afghanistan, thank you.

Posted
That's interesting. I didn't know an under-developed fetus was considered a "child". Learn something new every day.

 

If I wanted rich religious men to tell me what I can and can't do with my own body, I'd live in Afghanistan, thank you.

 

Fortunately there are folks like me who would consider your ideas not only not deal breakers, but agree totally. In fact, if the "product of conception" was ever an inconvenience you would have the option to terminate it in my empire.

Posted

Wow. Such prejudice in this forum especially against bipolars, vegatarians, and feminists. Some people here clearly don't know what these certain things are.

 

My number one deal breaker for me is someone who is very judgemental.

Posted
So it's not okay to hold someone's bipolar, something that can and will affect you, and your partner, against that person, but it's completely fine to hold running shoes against a guy?

 

Are you sure your medications are working as well you think they are? I know my ex's weren't.

 

I have to be with betamanlet on this....I personally know two ( yes i know,only two) women-both very close to me)not related to each other)...who have been very promiscuous when they are manic...I mean, one night stands with strangers! their families said that they can tell when they are in the manic phase because the "look" changes....more make-up and the clothes are more provocative...too much skin showing...and yes, inappropriately flirty...

 

I am sure there are many who have the illness but are not promiscuous...and many would would fall in love with them and vice versa....I think betamanlet is just saying, for him , that is a dealbreaker...why is that not acceptable or even allowed? it is his choice.

Posted
what trait is an ABSOLUTE dealbreak for you?

 

-abusive

-religious fanatics

-poor

  • Author
Posted
-abusive

-religious fanatics

-poor

 

 

what do you define as poor, and why is that a dealbreaker?

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