I bought a pair of manlet shoes online

[Rudderless]

I wouldn't get a boob job, and I'm an a/b cub (it varies with with my weight). Honestly, I have a hard time finding bras that aren't padded. I go with the least padding. Generally were the padding is just on the bottom so it pushes them up, instead of adding on a bigger look. I'm okay with what I have. I used to be more insecure about it, but I got over it.

 

I've been out with guys who are more of a 'boob man' and in the end, either they over looked that I had less in that area, or didn't find me as attraction. Either way, I was fine with what they chose, because I just want to be who I am.

 

So have you ever experimented with padded bra's or considered a boob job?

 

I'm just wondering because if you had a boob job would you expect a guy to bail on you? What about if you had a padded bra?

[DanielMadr]

So have you ever experimented with padded bra's or considered a boob job?

 

I'm just wondering because if you had a boob job would you expect a guy to bail on you? What about if you had a padded bra?

 

Hey, leave her alone. She is a girl. It is OK to be insecure about her boobs. (And she is not anymore. And good for her. Boobs are good but are not everything.)

 

But it is not OK for a guy to be insecure about whatever. Double standard? Maybe. But what a hell is it anyway and what significance has it in a real world?

[dreamergrl]

So have you ever experimented with padded bra's or considered a boob job?

 

I'm just wondering because if you had a boob job would you expect a guy to bail on you? What about if you had a padded bra?

 

I could understand if a guy was turned off by me adding on a few cup sizes with a bra. Like adding on a few inches to height. But my bras don't do that. They just make them sit higher so I fit right into my tops. At the most I've only looked to be a full b cup (which is not that big still). I never stuffed my bra or put in inserts. I've had molded cups, for when I wear t-shirts, other wise my other bras would show through more.

 

I never could talk myself into getting a boob job. For one, I'm scared to death of any type of surgery that involve a knife and stitches. For two, I don't want to be fake. Like I said, I just want to be me, and if a guy can't accept me for who I am, then they can move on.

 

But lets say someone gets a boob job. It's permanent (unless you get them removed). Lifts aren't. Those shoes come off and a girl will know. Boob jobs, yeah, I think some can tell if they are fake, others look and feel real.

 

Also boob jobs that are done for health reasons. Breast cancer and you lost one or both breasts. I can understand getting implants. Or losing a big portion of one and wanting to replace it. There is also tubular breasts.

 

I can understand getting a tummy tuck if you have massive amounts of a skin due to a large pregnancy.

 

But being shorter then some other guys is not a condition. It's not a health issue. And having it stuck in your head that you can't get a girl over it is just silly.

[dreamergrl]

Hey, leave her alone. She is a girl. It is OK to be insecure about her boobs. (And she is not anymore. And good for her. Boobs are good but are not everything.)

 

But it is not OK for a guy to be insecure about whatever. Double standard? Maybe. But what a hell is it anyway and what significance has it in a real world?

 

I don't think it's wrong for a guy to have some insecurity. But I think it's being taken to a whole new level here.

 

However, I think girls get insecure about their figure because so much emphasis has been put on what a girl should look like over the years. I don't think it is as bad as it used to be.

 

Look at barbie. Barbie had a thin waist, 'ideal' boobs and hips, and started out (and stayed) blond for how long? There's always been an idea of what a woman should look like.

[Rudderless]

But lets say someone gets a boob job. It's permanent (unless you get them removed). Lifts aren't. Those shoes come off and a girl will know. Boob jobs, yeah, I think some can tell if they are fake, others look and feel real.

Ok so this was the point I was trying to get at. Women have boob jobs and it's widely accepted. You say lifts aren't permanent, what about if he does what many chinese are doing at the threat of their health and getting their legs broken with 3 months of painful and dangerous surgery just to get 2 inches of height? This is done for health reasons for very short people as well. Did you know that the Italian prime minister openly admits to wearing lifts and is considering getting this surgery done?

 

I'm just curious here, because your former president (clinton) had a load of stuff done to his face that wasn't necessary, yet he's widely hailed as a great strong man isn't he? Ergo, why are you ragging on this guy?

[dreamergrl]

Ok so this was the point I was trying to get at. Women have boob jobs and it's widely accepted. You say lifts aren't permanent, what about if he does what many chinese are doing at the threat of their health and getting their legs broken with 3 months of painful and dangerous surgery just to get 2 inches of height? This is done for health reasons for very short people as well. Did you know that the Italian prime minister openly admits to wearing lifts and is considering getting this surgery done?

 

I'm just curious here, because your former president (clinton) had a load of stuff done to his face that wasn't necessary, yet he's widely hailed as a great strong man isn't he? Ergo, why are you ragging on this guy?

 

OP's height isn't VERY SHORT though, so it wouldn't be for a health reason. And I'm not sure why adding on two inches to your height would give you better health. And like I said, I'm not pro surgery for reasons beyond health. It's not as if OP is only five feet.

[virgin]

OP's height isn't VERY SHORT though, so it wouldn't be for a health reason. And I'm not sure why adding on two inches to your height would give you better health. And like I said, I'm not pro surgery for reasons beyond health. It's not as if OP is only five feet.

 

I agree with betamanlet though, women are extremely picky about men and seek perfection. They are always trying to trade up and to a "badder boy." Women always date "up" and look for traits like very high earning potential, height, or looks that will make their friends jealous. There is no such thing as unconditional love.

[sally4sara]

Your point is a little unclear, but it sounds like you mean that height is relative and women may only care that men are taller, but that the differential is otherwise unimportant. If you read the articles carefully, you'll see that's not true - childless men are 1.25" shorter than men with children, which is an absolute difference and not relative to women. Anecdotally, I've heard way more women rejecting shorter (or insufficiently tall) men than I've encountered shorter men refusing to date taller women. Guys may like smaller women, but not nearly as much as women like tall men.

 

What I saw in the articles is that anything you ting women are perpetrating on men in regards to height, men are perpetrating as well. The study on this I heard last week on NPR, stated that our species saw an increase in height or both genders due to better diet and medical care(other countries still improving this still see increase) but that men's height has been showing a leveling while women's height is still experiencing a decrease in the US. This would indicate it is men who are still choosing based on height while less women are doing the same.

The point I am trying to make is that even with a reflection on height, we still choose who we like best of our options and height is not the only measuring stick. Focus on it too much and you just come off as an obsessive and insecure. If a woman is 5' 4", any guy taller (by whatever amount) is an option. Why would she choose the one in lifts?!? It is clear THAT dude has no respect or belief in himself or he would be using his other selling points. A guy in lifts says "I don't have any other selling points."

You don't see women getting amputations to be shorter.

 

We all have selling points; whining and wearing shoes are not selling points.

[DanielMadr]

I don't think it's wrong for a guy to have some insecurity. But I think it's being taken to a whole new level here.

 

However, I think girls get insecure about their figure because so much emphasis has been put on what a girl should look like over the years. I don't think it is as bad as it used to be.

 

Look at barbie. Barbie had a thin waist, 'ideal' boobs and hips, and started out (and stayed) blond for how long? There's always been an idea of what a woman should look like.

 

Oh please. Don't start to be like these guys..."We can't find a girl because of society bias." So uncool and so not true.

 

For your information. Barbie is not ideal. Actually any proportions which are 0.7 hips to waist ratio are found sexy. And Barbie has no ideal boobs. Yes blond is attractive because it is rare I guess and blond girls are not so hairy therefore more feminine like.

 

What a hell. It is a toy for petes sake. Even kids know it is exaggerated like G.I. Joe or blue dogs or any toy with eyes bigger than hands.

[dreamergrl]

I agree with betamanlet though, women are extremely picky about men and seek perfection. They are always trying to trade up and to a "badder boy." Women always date "up" and look for traits like very high earning potential, height, or looks that will make their friends jealous. There is no such thing as unconditional love.

 

You are projecting your own experiences and troubles with having a girlfriend into false generalizations. SOME women are like this just as SOME men are like this. Don't group a gender into one category.

[Rudderless]

OP's height isn't VERY SHORT though, so it wouldn't be for a health reason. And I'm not sure why adding on two inches to your height would give you better health. And like I said, I'm not pro surgery for reasons beyond health. It's not as if OP is only five feet.

 

there's been many psychological studies carried out whereby the quality of life is shown to be improved by just 2 inches, it's available on our national health service and this form of surgery has been performed on numerous teenage children.

 

The OP's wouldn't be for a health reason of course. However, you say you're not pro surgery yet you've stated that it would be lame if a woman discovered lifts. On the other hand you've also stated that it's not lame if a man can't tell that boobs aren't real.

 

You're knocking down his lifts and stating any woman will run. I wonder if you would have the same gung ho approach to someone who bought a padded bra. You're basically encouraging him to go for something more permanent and get some surgery done.

[DanielMadr]

I agree with betamanlet though, women are extremely picky about men and seek perfection. They are always trying to trade up and to a "badder boy." Women always date "up" and look for traits like very high earning potential, height, or looks that will make their friends jealous. There is no such thing as unconditional love.

 

You are either a very wicked troll or you should shut the **** up, seriously.

[dreamergrl]

Oh please. Don't start to be like these guys..."We can't find a girl because of society bias." So uncool and so not true.

 

For your information. Barbie is not ideal. Actually any proportions which are 0.7 hips to waist ratio are found sexy. And Barbie has no ideal boobs. Yes blond is attractive because it is rare I guess and blond girls are not so hairy therefore more feminine like.

 

What a hell. It is a toy for petes sake. Even kids know it is exaggerated like G.I. Joe or blue dogs or any toy with eyes bigger than hands.

 

I'm not starting to be like anything. Like I said, I'm fine with who I am all around. But at one point, there was an ideal of what a girl is suppose to look like. There is no arguing that. I also said it's not quite like that any more.

 

Toys were once based off of something, where they not? Some still are.

[dreamergrl]

there's been many psychological studies carried out whereby the quality of life is shown to be improved by just 2 inches, it's available on our national health service and this form of surgery has been performed on numerous teenage children.

 

The OP's wouldn't be for a health reason of course. However, you say you're not pro surgery yet you've stated that it would be lame if a woman discovered lifts. On the other hand you've also stated that it's not lame if a man can't tell that boobs aren't real.

 

Where did I say it was lame to get implants if you couldn't tell the difference, if it wasn't for health reasons. I was just making a statement that sometimes you can't tell. Don't twist my words.

 

And yes, I think it is deceptive to pretend to be something you are not.

 

You're knocking down his lifts and stating any woman will run. I wonder if you would have the same gung ho approach to someone who bought a padded bra. You're basically encouraging him to go for something more permanent and get some surgery done.

 

Umm I never said OP should get something permanent done. I said OP should just accept that he's the height he is and deal with it, get over the notion that he cant' get a girl because of his height, and quit being so insecure.

[dreamergrl]

The point I am trying to make is that even with a reflection on height, we still choose who we like best of our options and height is not the only measuring stick. Focus on it too much and you just come off as an obsessive and insecure. If a woman is 5' 4", any guy taller (by whatever amount) is an option. Why would she choose the one in lifts?!? It is clear THAT dude has no respect or belief in himself or he would be using his other selling points. A guy in lifts says "I don't have any other selling points."

You don't see women getting amputations to be shorter.

 

We all have selling points; whining and wearing shoes are not selling points.

 

Very well said.

[DanielMadr]

I'm not starting to be like anything. Like I said, I'm fine with who I am all around. But at one point, there was an ideal of what a girl is suppose to look like. There is no arguing that. I also said it's not quite like that any more.

 

Toys were once based off of something, where they not? Some still are.

 

Yes, in some periods and in some societies there were some weird standards. Common sense and erections of mentaly healthy men tells us what is OK and what is not despite time.

 

I've never masturbated to Barbie and I don't get inferiority complex from G.I. Joe and I don't want my pet to look like Picachu.

 

If someone is stupid enough to masturbate to Barbie, wants to look like G.I. Joe and paint his dog yellow, I'd say he is just soft in the head. If we start to model toys, so those soft in the head have can't have excuses for their stupid complexes, we are just stupid too.

[Rudderless]

Where did I say it was lame to get implants if you couldn't tell the difference, if it wasn't for health reasons. I was just making a statement that sometimes you can't tell. Don't twist my words.

Oh well let me put it another way then, when you stated you were toying with the idea of a boob job back in August, were you going on about how all these women were lame for having them? Was anyone telling you how lame you were? Yet that's a step further than this guy has gone.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=197863

And yes, I think it is deceptive to pretend to be something you are not.

 

Umm I never said OP should get something permanent done. I said OP should just accept that he's the height he is and deal with it, get over the notion that he cant' get a girl because of his height, and quit being so insecure.

Obviously you didn't state it you just don't seem to be able to tell the difference between focusing on his psychological problem and just stating how stupid his lifts are, which is why I'm defending him..

 

I don't agree with him wearing lifts, I'd like him to be able to get over his issue, but focusing on how lame they are when you take them off isn't going to get the message across that his height isn't an issue.

Edited November 15, 2009 by Rudderless

[DanielMadr]

I don't agree with him wearing lifts, I'd like him to be able to get over his issue, but focusing on how lame they are when you take them off isn't going to get the message across that his height isn't an issue.

 

Buying highheels to look taller is lame.

 

And this thread is about whinning about double standards. Boobjob vs highheels. And it is lame too.

 

Realising how lame it is could help him stop being lame.

[Rudderless]

Buying highheels to look taller is lame.

 

And this thread is about whinning about double standards. Boobjob vs highheels. And it is lame too.

 

Realising how lame it is could help him stop being lame.

 

If only it was that simple. Sadly, often being overtly obvious that you think someone is lame seems to have the opposite effect of what you really intended. E.g., if you make it clear you have absolutely no interest in someone they'll often try their hardest to get your attention. I've never understood that.

[dreamergrl]

Oh well let me put it another way then, when you stated you were toying with the idea of a boob job back in August, were you going on about how all these women were lame for having them? Was anyone telling you how lame you were? Yet that's a step further than this guy has gone.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=197863

Obviously you didn't state it you just don't seem to be able to tell the difference between focusing on his psychological problem and just stating how stupid his lifts are, which is why I'm defending him..

 

I don't agree with him wearing lifts, I'd like him to be able to get over his issue, but focusing on how lame they are when you take them off isn't going to get the message across that his height isn't an issue.

 

I never said I haven't been insecure with my body in the past, but I've learned to accept it. There's been times where I wondered what I would be like with implants, but I never went through with it, and I never could. I focus on other aspects now, positive ones.

 

I never called anyone lame either.

 

You can't focus on the psychological part when the person in question is in denial about it. If he'd realize that when he takes them off, the girl is going to be turned off (likely, not for sure) he'd be saving himself some embarrassment and let down. I don't think another dig at his self confidence with that is going to be beneficial - psychologically.

[Rudderless]

By the way OP, I think you should count yourself lucky that you can get lifts. There are guys who hate being tall who actively seek limb shortening surgery. If this sounds crazy to you, consider this is the opposite end of the coin to where you are.

[dreamergrl]

I've toyed with the idea of getting implants.

 

Here is what I said in that post. As in 'I have' which means past tense. when I was insecure. Then I got over it. I didn't start massive amounts of threads about my boobs, Either. Which brings me too....

 

It's not a fair comparison either. How many obsessive threads have been started about height compared to boobs?

 

It's like the posters who go on and on about younger women. It's obsessive, and it's likely that it's the real reason why they can't get a bf or gf.

[Rudderless]

I never said I haven't been insecure with my body in the past, but I've learned to accept it. There's been times where I wondered what I would be like with implants, but I never went through with it, and I never could. I focus on other aspects now, positive ones.

 

I never called anyone lame either.

 

You can't focus on the psychological part when the person in question is in denial about it. If he'd realize that when he takes them off, the girl is going to be turned off (likely, not for sure) he'd be saving himself some embarrassment and let down. I don't think another dig at his self confidence with that is going to be beneficial - psychologically.

 

 

Which is a hell of a lot better than going through some surgery that might paralyse him.

 

I agree you didn't call him lame, but I certainly think you're backing up the person that did in focusing on the whole thing about lifts being a turnoff. I did ask you directly dreamer

 

I'm just wondering because if you had a boob job would you expect a guy to bail on you?

To which you responded

 

But lets say someone gets a boob job. It's permanent (unless you get them removed). Lifts aren't. Those shoes come off and a girl will know. Boob jobs, yeah, I think some can tell if they are fake, others look and feel real.

You don't seem to have answered that question. *shrug*. So OP, forget about the lifts because those are a turnoff, do what the women do and just go and get some surgery so it's "real" ok.

[DanielMadr]

If only it was that simple. Sadly, often being overtly obvious that you think someone is lame seems to have the opposite effect of what you really intended. E.g., if you make it clear you have absolutely no interest in someone they'll often try their hardest to get your attention. I've never understood that.

 

Yes. But I see better ways to help someone get rid of twisted mindset than to use the same twisted mindset through the whole thread and even argue with other people using the twisted mindset or arguments.

 

You can pretend you are supporting his views but you have to straighten him afterwards not let him dwell in the mud of whinning pain and feeling of injustice. Let there be light....I'd rather be a 5 feet guy than ugly girl in dating world.

They both have my condolences unless they blame society bias for their problems. It only points out they are not only small or ugly but jaded too.

[Rudderless]

Yes. But I see better ways to help someone get rid of twisted mindset than to use the same twisted mindset through the whole thread and even argue with other people using the twisted mindset or arguments.

 

You can pretend you are supporting his views but you have to straighten him afterwards not let him dwell in the mud of whinning pain and feeling of injustice. Let there be light....I'd rather be a 5 feet guy than ugly girl in dating world.

They both have my condolences unless they blame society bias for their problems. It only points out they are not only small or ugly but jaded too.

 

Sadly, often being overtly obvious that you think someone is lame seems to have the opposite effect of what you really intended. E.g., if you make it clear you have absolutely no interest in someone they'll often try their hardest to get your attention.

 

Pour your vitriol elsewhere buddy, maybe you'll get a bite