ses623 Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 I am going to explain this to the best of my ability and with clear thoughts, so please bear with me. So right now I am at a loss as to what to do. I am in a very sticky situation. Two of my best friends, one male and one female, whom dated for a year up until about 5 months ago, and I have recently became more than best friends with my female friend. My male friend has been a good friend since elementary school. My female friend and I have always had this "different connection" with one another basically since we met. When the three of us would hang out, it would always seem like it was just me and her. Not that I was attempting to steal away my buddies girlfriend, we just had a very strong and different connection with one another. We became best friends and confided everything in each other. 100% trust between us. Outside of my immediate family, she is the only person I trust and she has said the same about me. Nothing ever evolved from this up until recently one night at a bar with friends when she admitted that she felt like she should have been with me all along instead of my buddy. She told me her deepest feelings. I admitted that I felt the same way but from that point it became a very big weight on our shoulders due to my buddy. Jumping back to the reason they broke up was because of major trust issues. He lied to her. A LOT. Did a lot of decietful things. I always seen things from the sidelines but tried not to get put in the middle of things. Basically, I was their relationship councelor. He once admitted to her that he is a compulsive liar after they broke up months ago, and I just found out myself about some of the things he said and did to her behind her back, which I never knew and he has hid things from me as well. Because of that I lost a lot of respect for him and trust. And now she said she has closed the book on his and her friendship because of this and they are no longer talking. Her and I are getting much closer to each other and feelings are starting to envelop and my buddy knows nothing about this, although he does know that we are really good friends and we do talk. I do feel like a bad person in one way, but in another way it just feels so right to be with her that I can't let this slip through the cracks. She IS my best friend. Even before all of this her and I were always much closer than me and my buddy. I feel like I am willing to risk everything but then again there is this huge weight on my shoulders. She knows this and knows what I am going through. I don't want to hurt my friend. I feel like I need to give it time before he can find out about it. I just don't know what to do or what to think. I have been really stressed out about it for the past few days. If anyone can shed some light on this situation, please, I thank you so much. I probably left out some details but will clarify things if you are confused. Thanks again.
justforfun Posted November 12, 2009 Posted November 12, 2009 This isn't an unusual situation. You were both attracted to each others qualities for a long time. Maybe subconsciously she stayed with him to be around you. Maybe you remained friends with the loser so you could be around her. I understand you are in a dilemma. But as an outside observer, without the complications of being in the middle of it, I would absolute say you should go forward with this. You know in your heart you should. And I've got a good feeling about this one
Author ses623 Posted November 17, 2009 Author Posted November 17, 2009 Thank you. Although my mind has been made up all along to go through with this, I guess I was just seeking some more insight to clear my mind. The past week has been absolutely incredible with us. Spent nearly four days together and it didn't even seem like it was longer than a few hours. Things are escalating very good, and there is so much passion between us that it's unreal. The initial situation was pretty crappy, we've talked about it and I feel much better about it and 100% sure this is what I want and the right thing to do. Thanks again.
justforfun Posted November 17, 2009 Posted November 17, 2009 Thank you. Although my mind has been made up all along to go through with this, I guess I was just seeking some more insight to clear my mind. The past week has been absolutely incredible with us. Spent nearly four days together and it didn't even seem like it was longer than a few hours. Things are escalating very good, and there is so much passion between us that it's unreal. The initial situation was pretty crappy, we've talked about it and I feel much better about it and 100% sure this is what I want and the right thing to do. Thanks again. YAY!!!!!! WOOHOO!!! I'm so happy for you. Now even if this thread dies will you still come back and keep us posted.
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