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Why you should NOT break NC


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Posted

I saw an ex last night....I knew before hand that I would be seeing her and it stirred up a lot of different thoughts and emotions. I broke up with her and wanted her back in case you were wondering.

 

I tried to remain in her life before, having limited contact for several months, a text or two here and there and it only prevented me from moving on. I finally said enough and was on three months of no contact.

 

Those three months I saw an amazing transformation! Yes I thought about her often, thought about sending a note, but didn't (and it wasn't easy!). What happened was slowly forgetting about the past, forgiving myself, and focusing on the present, focusing on ME.

 

And then I see her....my knees buckled, heart started pounding, but then after a few minutes.....nothing. I felt fine. I felt empowered! I was myself again! I didn't care if we even talked to each other!

 

We did chat briefly. I admit it was really nice to talk to her again, but what surprised me the most, unlike the previous encounters when I was nervous or trying to impress her or something like that, I didn't have those feelings. I was just my usual self. IT'S THE GREATES FEELING IN THE WORLD!!

 

Stay strong, don't break the silence! If/when you ever see an ex again you will one day have this same feeling.

Posted

I must ask you, since I'm in a similar position... how did you get over the regret and guilt? I've thought myself half crazy trying to forgive myself for hurting her, and subsequently, myself. :(

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Posted

Well, this might not make sense and might be bad advice to some, but I kept loving her. Even though she could care less about me I focused on the good things she taught me. For example, she is always a positive person and I took that quality about her and incorporated it into my own life.

 

I know it's hard but day by day you will move on and let go. The regret and guilt will fade away. Honestly, I thought I'd be back to having those feelings again, so I am a little surprised myself. The confident person I am just came back unexpectedly.

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