boredwithhusband Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 I have been with my spouse for 3 years and have two kids together before I met him I was engaged to another person that i feel was the love of my life. I love my husband and my kids but there is always this gut feeling that i was meant to be with this other person. (the story about the ex) We were engaged and he got invovled with drugs and time after time he lied about quiting and i had an infant son that i did not want around that, we would do the normal breakup get back together thing and then finally after almost 3 years of that i just threw the towel in. I always tried to tell myself that i was over him and we talk about once every 4-6 months and he is engaged to someone else and we arrange a time to meet up. When we do it is like old times the feelings come back we talk about what went srong what he did and now he is clean and how he couldnt get clean for me and our son but could for someone else. He tells me he loves me as we leave each other and it just breaks my heart. He is the man that I know I will love forever but can never be with, there is to much history and to many broken hearts but i dont know what to do to make it go away. I keep things that he bought me in the past hidden becasue i dont have the heart to throw them away and i know if my husband found them his heart would be broken. I dont lie to him about talking to this person but i do not inform him that we have seen each other. We have not had a sexual relationship up to this point but the more we see each other I am afraid that one night it will happen not because I want it to but becasue we both feel the same way for each other but both of us know that it could never be and i think that is part of the problem. They always say you want what you cant have.
dreamergrl Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 I think you are emotionally cheating on your husband.
traderho Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 Are you in the wrong? Absolutely! Right now you are emotionally cheating on your husband, its only a matter of time before it becomes physical as well.
Dexter Morgan Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 well lets see, you hook up with your now husband when engaged to someone else.....now you are bored with your current husband after only 3 years. Your name says it all. You are fickle. No one man will keep your interest for long. you need to NOT be married.....to anyone. with that, what are you going to do? get a divorce?
lostsunsets Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 (edited) You're having an affair. And you are right it is only a matter of time till you have sex with him. On that day you will destroy your husband and your family. Selfish, aren't you? Oh and I especially like how you throw in that you love your husband. Really? Edited November 10, 2009 by lostsunsets
seibert253 Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 Are you in the wrong? Absolutely! Right now you are emotionally cheating on your husband, its only a matter of time before it becomes physical as well. Absolutely on the money. You know this, you pretty much admitted it. You need to end contact with your ex, otherwise your relationship will become physical. There's one sure way to ensure you end contact with your ex, and remain NC: Tell your husband what you've been doing. If he doesn't kick you to the curb, and wants to fix your marriage, I'm sure he will more than insistant you never speak to your ex again. If you continue your current path, you will destroy your marriage. You know this, you just haven't had the courage to admit it.
dreamergrl Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 Maybe I'm reading wrong.. but I think OP has a child with the ex. He may want contact? But OP definitely needs to tell husband about all of this.
Lish Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 I think you are emotionally cheating on your husband. I completely agree. You're totally in the wrong. Btw dreamer, I read up on your recent incidents, and I hope everything is going well
Space Ritual Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 I have been with my spouse for 3 years and have two kids together before I met him I was engaged to another person that i feel was the love of my life. I love my husband and my kids but there is always this gut feeling that i was meant to be with this other person. (the story about the ex) We were engaged and he got invovled with drugs and time after time he lied about quiting and i had an infant son that i did not want around that, we would do the normal breakup get back together thing and then finally after almost 3 years of that i just threw the towel in. I always tried to tell myself that i was over him and we talk about once every 4-6 months and he is engaged to someone else and we arrange a time to meet up. When we do it is like old times the feelings come back we talk about what went srong what he did and now he is clean and how he couldnt get clean for me and our son but could for someone else. He tells me he loves me as we leave each other and it just breaks my heart. He is the man that I know I will love forever but can never be with, there is to much history and to many broken hearts but i dont know what to do to make it go away. I keep things that he bought me in the past hidden becasue i dont have the heart to throw them away and i know if my husband found them his heart would be broken. I dont lie to him about talking to this person but i do not inform him that we have seen each other. We have not had a sexual relationship up to this point but the more we see each other I am afraid that one night it will happen not because I want it to but becasue we both feel the same way for each other but both of us know that it could never be and i think that is part of the problem. They always say you want what you cant have. It is clear that sadly you are not emotionally mature enough to be in any kind of relationship with anyone. You may not tell your husband that you meet this other man, but a HALF TRUTH IS STILL A WHOLE LIE! I suggest you come clean with your husband...looks like you have a lot of growing up to do.
road Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 You are having an affair, an EA, emotional affair. You are on the slippery slope to a PA. You must go NC with the EX/OM
Bryanp Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 How would you feel if your husband was doing to you what you are doing to him? You are totally disrespecting your husband. Does he really deserve this type of disrespectful behavior from you? It sounds like you are just using your husband as a meal ticket.
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