blahh12 Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 Sorry if this is long, but ugh, nothing hurts more than seeing your ex happy with someone else when you just broke up a mere three weeks ago and you can't seem to move on. From everything I know about him I am shocked that he would do his. He has never been the type to jump from one relationship to the next. i mean, it took him over a year to date after he broke up with his last gf before me. A bit of a background on the situation, we started dating at the beginning of the summer and continued to date for 5 months after, exchanging "i love you's" after dating for a month or so. There was a bit of an age difference, with me being 22 and him 31 while we dated. Things seemed to go pretty well during the summer, and we were inseparable, spending almost every day together. I did get a bit of insight into his character though as he drank a lot and was a mean drunk. Things seemed to change though when I went back for my last year of college, it is an hour away and i was always the one driving to see him since he lost vision in one eye an cannot drive. He would get upset when I would go out with friends and be out with them instead of at home talking to him on the phone. Things ended when i saw a text message from him to his ex, who i had always suspected he was still not over, telling her that he missed her and had only ever been in love with her. I broke things off then and there, and he didnt even try to fight it or defend himself. He texted and called me daily for a week after that and i was pretty adamant about not talking to him, until about a week later when we spoke on the phone, and i broke down and went to see him(horrible, i know.) We ended up sleeping together and he keeps telling me he loves. Then here's the kicker: in the morning when we wake up he tells me he has a date at 5 o clock that day with an 18 year old girl he really likes and is ditching me for her. Then some comments on how i am too old and fat, 18 year olds are thinner and tighter, and how he is upgrading me for a younger, hotter model. (I am 23 and 115 pounds mind you) That was pretty much the end for me until i passed by his house late at night one night (one of my close friends lives on his street) and her car was in his driveway. I made the mistake of trying to contact him, ugh. The next day he actually had the adacity to call me with his new girlfriend listening on speaker phone to tell me to leave him and his new girlfriend alone. He talks about how happy they are together and how great she is. We discussed our situation briefly on the phone and apparently she knows about the whole situation with us, how he treated me, about his anger problems, and that we had sex on the same day they went out on their second date, and yet still wants to date him. Apparently he painted me out to psycho ex girlfriend. Its killing me that he was able to start dating someone new a week after we broke up. The thing is, i dont want to get back together with him, i know he is a jerk and i deserve a million times better, but for some reason it still hurts. I think its the fact that he found someone else so soon and i haven't yet. She is sleeping in the bed we used to sleep in together, meeting his parents. I keep telling myself they wont last and he will do the same thing to her eventually. I know i need to move on for good and nothing good will ever come of contacting him. any advice?
photobooth Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 Sorry if this is long, but ugh, nothing hurts more than seeing your ex happy with someone else when you just broke up a mere three weeks ago and you can't seem to move on. From everything I know about him I am shocked that he would do his. He has never been the type to jump from one relationship to the next. i mean, it took him over a year to date after he broke up with his last gf before me. A bit of a background on the situation, we started dating at the beginning of the summer and continued to date for 5 months after, exchanging "i love you's" after dating for a month or so. There was a bit of an age difference, with me being 22 and him 31 while we dated. Things seemed to go pretty well during the summer, and we were inseparable, spending almost every day together. I did get a bit of insight into his character though as he drank a lot and was a mean drunk. Things seemed to change though when I went back for my last year of college, it is an hour away and i was always the one driving to see him since he lost vision in one eye an cannot drive. He would get upset when I would go out with friends and be out with them instead of at home talking to him on the phone. Things ended when i saw a text message from him to his ex, who i had always suspected he was still not over, telling her that he missed her and had only ever been in love with her. I broke things off then and there, and he didnt even try to fight it or defend himself. He texted and called me daily for a week after that and i was pretty adamant about not talking to him, until about a week later when we spoke on the phone, and i broke down and went to see him(horrible, i know.) We ended up sleeping together and he keeps telling me he loves. Then here's the kicker: in the morning when we wake up he tells me he has a date at 5 o clock that day with an 18 year old girl he really likes and is ditching me for her. Then some comments on how i am too old and fat, 18 year olds are thinner and tighter, and how he is upgrading me for a younger, hotter model. (I am 23 and 115 pounds mind you) That was pretty much the end for me until i passed by his house late at night one night (one of my close friends lives on his street) and her car was in his driveway. I made the mistake of trying to contact him, ugh. The next day he actually had the adacity to call me with his new girlfriend listening on speaker phone to tell me to leave him and his new girlfriend alone. He talks about how happy they are together and how great she is. We discussed our situation briefly on the phone and apparently she knows about the whole situation with us, how he treated me, about his anger problems, and that we had sex on the same day they went out on their second date, and yet still wants to date him. Apparently he painted me out to psycho ex girlfriend. Its killing me that he was able to start dating someone new a week after we broke up. The thing is, i dont want to get back together with him, i know he is a jerk and i deserve a million times better, but for some reason it still hurts. I think its the fact that he found someone else so soon and i haven't yet. She is sleeping in the bed we used to sleep in together, meeting his parents. I keep telling myself they wont last and he will do the same thing to her eventually. I know i need to move on for good and nothing good will ever come of contacting him. any advice? You are exactly right...NOTHING hurts worse than seeing the love of your life happy with someone else. I can totally relate to you because my ex cheated on me (after 2 EXTREMELY great years) and then she started dating the guy in a long distance relationship a week later. What your ex did to you is simply selfish and downright f'ed up. for him to call you up with his new girl present is a knife to the heart. Im sure every person around you is telling you to move on and you can do better, but I know what your probably thinking because I am too right now. That this person they are right now isnt who you fell in love with. This isnt the person I spent every single day having deep conversations and building signficant memories with. Trust me, in due time, if he ever did truly love you, he will realize that he made a huge mistake and the power will be in your hands. You arent turning into a psycho ex g/f....you are just trying to understand the situation in full. If you want my advice, try and go no contact for at least a week...play it cool WHEN he tries to contact you (because he will) and gain the power back. If you truly want to win him back, you cant be perceived as needy in his eyes. make him realize your not dependent on him for happiness. But in the end, Karma will fix everything. I've been cheated on twice before this time and each girl who cheated had a horrible next few years. I know they are no words that can comfort you right now, but just keep posting updates here in the forum and others like you will relate and relay helpful info. its helped me out a ton the last week
ItsAllGoodAgain Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 Drop this *********!!! Not only is he blind in one eye but blind in the head!!! You need to stop contact and move on. If you don't want to be the psycho ex gf then don't allow yourself to be. Delete this douche and move on.
Author blahh12 Posted November 18, 2009 Author Posted November 18, 2009 thanks for the advice, i do need to forget him. lately he has been contacting me periodically even though he has a new gf. i havent been responding. and the other night he actually sent a picture of her to me a couple of my friends. i couldnt see the picture on my phone, but my friends said she is cute ughh. and then he sends me a text asking me for naked pictures.. ugh wtf?
jerseyboy Posted November 18, 2009 Posted November 18, 2009 Just block the loser , email, phone etc, and give yourself time to get over the habit of him Let the next time you see him be when hes being interviewed on some NBC Nightline Sting with some tv reporter asking him why he was coming to see an underage girl Hes got issues beyond those you pointed out
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