weltrav Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 I think that part of the reason letting my ex go is so difficult is because just over 2 years ago in college we met and our shared passion for what is becoming a career became so intertwined with one another. So now, I can't pick up a book or think about what was/is my greatest interest and passion without feeling sick in the stomach, without thinking of her. Add to that I'm applying to PhD programs, another venture we set out upon together, and that tortures me even more. Add to that the guy she's seeing now supposedly is an 'amatuer hobbiest' in what was our area of expertise and interest, he's an IT guy at a company. I simply can't believe she'd pass up a boyfriend who shared the same passion for an IT guy. I mean, I suppose she'll never have to worry when her laptop crashes, but c'mon! Maybe someone in LS has had a common experience, with an ex who became almost synonymous with a personal interest/identity/passion.
USMCHokie Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 (edited) Add to that the guy she's seeing now supposedly is an 'amatuer hobbiest' in what was our area of expertise and interest, he's an IT guy at a company. I simply can't believe she'd pass up a boyfriend who shared the same passion for an IT guy. I mean, I suppose she'll never have to worry when her laptop crashes, but c'mon! For some reason unknown to me, they always tend to downgrade after they leave you...mine certainly did... But remember, it may not make sense to you that a girl would pass up someone who shares their passion...but you can't drive yourself crazy with whatever nonsense is going on in her head...it may be irrational, and it may not make sense, but it just is...it's not your problem or concern how she wants to live her life...even if it ends up being detrimental to her in the long run...I still have trouble getting over that myself... I've played golf competitively for the past few years...and I actually taught my ex how to play golf, and she got pretty good...it was something that we'd go out on a weekend afternoon to do, and I had a great time with her either out on the driving range or even the course...after we broke up, I stopped playing altogether for about 2 months...stopped practicing...stopped playing in tournaments...even stopped playing just for fun...because it stopped being fun...even now, I'm not really into it as much as before...but I'm slowly working my way back to it...maybe next spring...I learned that I can never let a girl affect me this badly that I'd lose all interest in one of my life's biggest passions... Now my experience doesn't compare to yours which involves a career, so it's not like you can just take a break from it or leave it altogether...but my recommendation would be to meet new people in your field...even if they're guys...just new people to associate those interests and career aspirations with...and of course time will be a key player in this...it'll be tough now, but somewhere down the line it always gets easier... Edited November 9, 2009 by USMCHokie
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