having a hard time coping with my first breakup :(

[kairi and sora]

okay so im a freshmen in college now, and ive only had one girlfriend in the past, weve gone to school together since 1st grade, and were best friends for 3 years prior to going out. we started to go out around christmas last year, and she was my first everything, first kiss, first time holding hands, first time "around the bases" as you will. we were so in love, everything was perfect, we would spend basically every moment together, and i revolved my world around this girl for a little over 10 months, everything i could do to make her happy and bring a smile to her face, i did. i thought she was the one, i thought that she would be my one and only, but i found out a week ago that she cheated on me i was so heartbroken, so depressed, i just slept through everyday, only to cry when i got up. not getting out of bed, no nothing, its been 3 days now of NC and im starting to lose my mind, ive tried hanging out with friends, trying new things, everything, working out, training, running, i cant get my mind off of her. she tried to call me yesterday about 3 or 4 times, but i was so determined not to break nc, but she didnt leave a message or text or anything. theres some things of mine that she has that i would really like back, personal momentos from my childhood i gave her out of confidence, so she would always have a little piece of me with her.

 

i just need some kind words right now i guess :'( someone with some words of wisdom or advice to help get me through this :'( i just want her back so bad, i want eveyrhting to go back to normal, even though i know it cant

[NoneoftheAbove]

Im sorry you are going through this. You have to forgive yourself to be able to move on, don't fight with your own brain " Your brain can be your best friend at the same time it can be your worst enemy" so think about it. You did all you can, showed her in many ways that you love her and there is no one else but her don't beat yourself over it. You have to try harder, the more you think about it more that hole gets bigger. If that person loves you she will contact you in other ways, there is no one out there that can stop a lover from getting to their love. I ll be here if you need to talk.

[kairi and sora]

its just so hard though, i mean we did literally everything together, i cant turn on the tv, play a video game, or watch a movie without thinking about her. and the fact that i have to pass by her house everyday when i want to get on the freeway doesnt help much either. im willing to forgive her, im willing to give her another chance, but i dont know if i should. my family and friends have all been telling me that ill get over it, and ill find someone else, but i dont WANT to find someone else, i was determined to do everything i could to spend the rest of my life with this girl. im just lost and confused and have no idea what to do now, do i break nc to try to talk to her? do i continue with nc to see if it draws her back to me? so many ideas, but not all smart ideas

[GrayClouds]

its been 3 days now of NC and im starting to lose my mind, ive tried hanging out with friends, trying new things, everything, working out, training, running, i cant get my mind off of her. she tried to call me yesterday about 3 or 4 times, but i was so determined not to break nc, but she didnt leave a message or text or anything. theres some things of mine that she has that i would really like back, personal momentos from my childhood i gave her out of confidence, so she would always have a little piece of me with her.

 

It sucks. The good news is your doing all the right things. It is simple going to take time. Keep up the the NC and friends, exercise, ect.

 

For your stuff make a list and ask a friend to arrange to pick them up for you.

 

Remember her behavior is not about you it is all about her and her own issues. There is a lot of chicks out there who will appreciate a boyfriend like you, she just was not one of them.

[NoneoftheAbove]

No don't break NC no matter what, i know it's hard and it's going to be hard for a while but believe me you WILL get out of it. You can't break free until you let it go, you say you want to give her a second chance stick to NC if that moment represents itself than take it but don't be the one to crawl back in. If it's possible take another freeway until you get her out of your head. In the mean time heal yourself, set boundaries make sure whatever she did she won't repeat it again because that will only hurt you more. Read some of my threads on this, second chance is not always the best option for you. But you will get through this no matter what, think positively and let other thoughts fly away they are only causing you pain.