clv0116 Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 clv, shut up. "Female anger is the weathervane of truth" Size 14 is not "cute". Sorry.
Author GypsyRayne Posted November 9, 2009 Author Posted November 9, 2009 I looked at your chart. Let me clarify this for you my size 4 jeans are loose, not tight. They come from American Eagle, old navy, gap, etc. The other jeans I buy are either a size 3 or 5 from the jr dept. I have not ever in my life wore misses sized clothes.
mark982 Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 gypsy, your husbands a azz, you sounds great to me.
Try2BeSupportive Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 Gypsy, The lady in other thread is 1" shorter, and nearly 50 pounds heavier than you. Also she gained 50 (not 40 as you said) over a couple years, and has admitted that she "got thin" in order to attract a mate but then stopped working out. Her husband does not want sex with her. This sounds nothing like your situation !!! You said you were not any thinner when you met H. Just because your H likes the appearance of a slim lady (news flash ... most men do) - well you should not feel any need to change. Obviously your H was attracted to you at 135 when you met, so he is just being mean to expect you to lose weight now. The normal range of weights (per BMI standard) for 5'3" would be 104 to 140 pounds. At 135 you are "normal weight" from health perspective. Although there should not be any major health difference within this range, certainly you would look very different at either extreme. Based on your own awareness of covering your stomach, it sounds like you might in fact be unhappy with your appearance at 135. Why not lose a few? And not for your mean H, but for yourself.
frustrated_one Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 This IS NOT true - I never said I "got thin" to attract a mate. I lost most of my weight in 2003 - I met my husband in Dec. 2004. At 5'3" and 135 Try2B is NOT fat. When I was 130ish I was wearing a size 4 CLV can say that's a "vanity" size but that's the size on the pants from Kohl's. I think it is ridiculous that your husband is demeaning you. While my husband has rejected me for sex, in every other way he is very kind to me. It sounds like Try2B's husband has issues and he's taking them out on his wife. Shame on him! Gypsy, The lady in other thread is 1" shorter, and nearly 50 pounds heavier than you. Also she gained 50 (not 40 as you said) over a couple years, and has admitted that she "got thin" in order to attract a mate but then stopped working out. Her husband does not want sex with her. This sounds nothing like your situation !!! You said you were not any thinner when you met H. Just because your H likes the appearance of a slim lady (news flash ... most men do) - well you should not feel any need to change. Obviously your H was attracted to you at 135 when you met, so he is just being mean to expect you to lose weight now. The normal range of weights (per BMI standard) for 5'3" would be 104 to 140 pounds. At 135 you are "normal weight" from health perspective. Although there should not be any major health difference within this range, certainly you would look very different at either extreme. Based on your own awareness of covering your stomach, it sounds like you might in fact be unhappy with your appearance at 135. Why not lose a few? And not for your mean H, but for yourself.
Try2BeSupportive Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 This IS NOT true - I never said I "got thin" to attract a mate. I lost most of my weight in 2003 - I met my husband in Dec. 2004. Sorry about this Gypsy ... looks like your thread-jack is getting .... jacked Frustrated_One - I was not trying to mis-represent your story. I just wanted to point out substantial differences with Gypsy's story. Here is where I formed the impression about "got thin to attract a mate" What triggered my motivated to lose that weight was twofold: 1) when I looked at my face in the mirror, I did not recognize the person staring back at me and 2) My 20th HS reunion was coming up, I was single and wanted to look H-O-T! I was totally committed and focused like a laser. I told my hair stylist that I was going to lose the 50 lbs and she was doubtful. Every 6 weeks that I'd go back to see her she could tell I was shrinking. I was a size 8/10 for my reunion (I had started at an 18)
JamesM Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 It is all about perception. My wife at 5' 5" and 140# is extremely hot. She gets the most looks from men at that weight. I could describe her as to why she is best at that weight, or I could show you a picture. (No, I didn't put one in my profile. ) Her figure is best proportioned at that weight. She is a bit bigger breasted with some hippiness and no stomach at that weight. To me a woman that is too petite is not as pretty as one who has a little flesh. BUT...it depends where it is all located. If a woman is small breasted and big hipped or big breasted and small hipped or of the weight is in the stomach and nowhere else, then all of those make for a completely different looking figure. And on this board, you can find guys who prefer one of them over all of the others. I have no doubt that many men would look at my wife and admire her figure yet when it came down to it, they would choose a different size for their wife. I admit that I admire smaller size women but my wife is still the best size for me, because....well, she is much more than a body or a weight size. IMO there are two issues here... 1. How you feel about your body. 2. How your husband feels about your body. Funny thing is...you could have the perfect body to most men, but if your husband makes comments that negate what the other men say, then you wonder if you do look good. Obvious reason is...your husband's opinion about your body is the most important one to you. So, how do you feel about your body and figure without the husband's opinion? And then, what size body does your husband prefer and were you that weight when he met you? Your husband should have married you for more than your body weight. Most men do. We do like to see our wives fit, but we do (or should) recognize that weight fluctuates. What we should love our wives for is the person they are no matter what the weight. My feelings for my wife and sex have not really changed (except when she was pregnant...different story for me) despite weight increases or decreases. As of now, she is probably thirty pounds overweight (as she tells me). Yet to me, she is still just as sexy, because her personality and her smile and her eyes have not changed. Your husband's criticism of your body says more about his feelings for you and less about your body weight. My guess is that this is what bothers you most of all.
PandorasBox Posted November 9, 2009 Posted November 9, 2009 It is all about perception. My wife at 5' 5" and 140# is extremely hot. She gets the most looks from men at that weight. I could describe her as to why she is best at that weight, or I could show you a picture. (No, I didn't put one in my profile. ) Her figure is best proportioned at that weight. She is a bit bigger breasted with some hippiness and no stomach at that weight. To me a woman that is too petite is not as pretty as one who has a little flesh. BUT...it depends where it is all located. If a woman is small breasted and big hipped or big breasted and small hipped or of the weight is in the stomach and nowhere else, then all of those make for a completely different looking figure. And on this board, you can find guys who prefer one of them over all of the others. I have no doubt that many men would look at my wife and admire her figure yet when it came down to it, they would choose a different size for their wife. I admit that I admire smaller size women but my wife is still the best size for me, because....well, she is much more than a body or a weight size. IMO there are two issues here... 1. How you feel about your body. 2. How your husband feels about your body. Funny thing is...you could have the perfect body to most men, but if your husband makes comments that negate what the other men say, then you wonder if you do look good. Obvious reason is...your husband's opinion about your body is the most important one to you. So, how do you feel about your body and figure without the husband's opinion? And then, what size body does your husband prefer and were you that weight when he met you? Your husband should have married you for more than your body weight. Most men do. We do like to see our wives fit, but we do (or should) recognize that weight fluctuates. What we should love our wives for is the person they are no matter what the weight. My feelings for my wife and sex have not really changed (except when she was pregnant...different story for me) despite weight increases or decreases. As of now, she is probably thirty pounds overweight (as she tells me). Yet to me, she is still just as sexy, because her personality and her smile and her eyes have not changed. Your husband's criticism of your body says more about his feelings for you and less about your body weight. My guess is that this is what bothers you most of all. I totally agree with James. I also want to add, that to me, not only is it about his feeling for you, it could also say alot about how he feels about himself as well.
clv0116 Posted November 10, 2009 Posted November 10, 2009 ..... I was wearing a size 4 CLV can say that's a "vanity" size but that's the size on the pants from Kohl's. Hey, think what you like but it's not 0116 who's invented the standard clothing charts, that would be the US Government, the military specifically IIRC, and then clothiers adopted and later abandoned the standard for marketing reasons, AKA vanity sizing. If you're not very close to 34-24-36 you're not a (standard) size 4. If you are and weigh 135 at 5' 3, well wow. Color me surprised.
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