JaggedRoad Posted November 7, 2009 Posted November 7, 2009 After the break-up, my ex developed a God complex and acted very arrogant. Is this normal?
onewillburn Posted November 7, 2009 Posted November 7, 2009 It's normal. When the dumper breaks up with you, they have a feeling of power. If they are led to believe that they can have you back at any time, that feeling of power grows. This all depends on how you act after the break up. If you're calling them, writing letters to them, etc. their ego is going to grow. And many times when somebody breaks up with you, there is somebody else in their life (whether it be new friends or a new boyfriend/girlfriend) to help boost their confidence. Either way, the confidence doesn't last because after a while it has no legs to stand on. The quickest way to get rid of that God complex is to stop caring about her, or at least stop giving her the impression that you care.
GrayClouds Posted November 7, 2009 Posted November 7, 2009 It also can do with over compensation for feeling superior can cover up guilt. There is also the chance, tough I admit very slim, that she acutrally is a god. Not the "GOD" god but one like those of Greece. But even if that is the case, arrogance is usually punished like Themis' son Prometheus, by Zeus. I guess what I am saying don't worry about it and keep the focus on what matters: you.
Author JaggedRoad Posted November 8, 2009 Author Posted November 8, 2009 It's hard to keep focus on myself when I have to look back at the last 3 years and ask myself if any of it was real. What the eff was I doing? I should have been more careful when redflags started popping up everywhere in the last 14 months.
GrayClouds Posted November 8, 2009 Posted November 8, 2009 It's hard to keep focus on myself when I have to look back at the last 3 years and ask myself if any of it was real. What the eff was I doing? I should have been more careful when redflags started popping up everywhere in the last 14 months. But that is why the saying hind sight is 20/20. You look back and see you could have done things better. That is the insight you have gained form the break-up. More important questions what can you do and learn that will help you from doing it again? And that is all about you. The more you focus and work on the things everyone says, exercise, new hobbies, building closer friends, taking classes, therapy, ect, ect ,ect. These things are not just about distracting yourself from the break-up. They do amazing things without you knowing about it; they build confidence, greater self reliance, a support network, a deeper understanding of who you are and what you want in your life. That is the junk that keeps us from putting up with people who are not right for us or good for us, or simply waste or time. It is the stuff that attract other healthy people who can be honest in a relationship and work as a team through problems. It is the ingredients that sustains us when we are not in a relationhship so we can continue to enjoy your life.
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