hpnutter Posted November 7, 2009 Posted November 7, 2009 I just need to ask this question tho I've got another thread going. My boyfriend of 4 years (LDR for 2) says the spark has gone and he loves me but isn't sure if it isn't in a different way, more like friends than lovers. Is there any way we can change this? I've made lots of suggestions but he's thinking about things because he says he's confused and upset too and wants to figure things out and make the right decision. Is this a lost cause now? Can people get the spark back? Can you get back to feeling like lovers once you've started drifting towards friends? I feel so upset, I don't want to break up. I felt we were drifting (which is why I brought it up and now I've caused everything to crash down around me), but I still want him for my boyfriend! :-( Please help!
Space Ritual Posted November 7, 2009 Posted November 7, 2009 Unfortunately for me I was never able to. But more often than not that conversation seems to come up whenever s new person has appeared in one of the partners lives. Are you in the LDR portion now? The reason I ask is because I was in a similar situation with my last GF. We were at one point literally 1000 miles away from each other. I had plans to move to her city in New Hampshire on a permanent basis, but by the time I had gotten there she (and we hadn't seen each other in the flesh for a couple of months) she began telling me the same type of things. and 2 days after I arrived I found out that she had practically moved someone else in and had been keeping the charade up that everything was ok. So I went from one morning being on top of the world to jumping in my car and driving back to Chicago cursing her name. If you are in an LDR it takes constant communication and trust. I learned the hard way. So I seriously would not get my hopes up.
GrayClouds Posted November 7, 2009 Posted November 7, 2009 I just need to ask this question tho I've got another thread going. My boyfriend of 4 years (LDR for 2) says the spark has gone and he loves me but isn't sure if it isn't in a different way, more like friends than lovers. Is there any way we can change this? I've made lots of suggestions but he's thinking about things because he says he's confused and upset too and wants to figure things out and make the right decision. Is this a lost cause now? Can people get the spark back? Can you get back to feeling like lovers once you've started drifting towards friends? I feel so upset, I don't want to break up. I felt we were drifting (which is why I brought it up and now I've caused everything to crash down around me), but I still want him for my boyfriend! :-( Please help! Here: So you want a second chance?
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