goofykid1 Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 I have been w/ my bf for 3 years. We've talked about marriage and looked at rings. We're in the process of buying a condo now. I know he loves me and I love him. Backstory: He cheated on his girlfriend at the time w/ me at the tail-end of their relationship. They had a rocky relationship the entire time and took several breaks. After they broke up, we dated for a year before I moved to a new city and 4 months later, he followed. We have lived together for 2 years now. This week: I snooped into his email, yes yes, despicable, and found an email between him and the ex-girlfriend (who has had the same boyfriend for 2+ years). The email detailed their plans to go away for a weekend together for no-strings-attached fun. SO...He hasn't cheated, yet. I snooped in his email. I'm NOT going to tell him that I snooped. I hinted around to figure out whether there was anything wrong within the relationship and he said (as always) that he would never do anything to ruin our relationship. What to do???? How to confront? How to stop this train from crashing just yet?
BG1985 Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 Now that you know, there's no sense in hiding it. You're never going trust him. You won't forget that you saw that email.
JustLooking123 Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 Um, he cheated WITH you. Why do you expect him not to cheat ON you? There's clearly no trust in this relationship, otherwise you wouldn't snoop in his email. If you think you deserve better, walk away from this relationship and spend some time working on yourself. Otherwise, good luck...
Lizzie60 Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 Yep he's definitely planning to cheat on you.. he was quite clear in the email... now they haven't .. and maybe won't... from what I read.. he invited her.. maybe she don't want him anymore.. who knows?
Lishy Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 yep he is defo planning to cheat ... you cant stop it! He is a proven cheat anyway so why be shocked? What goes around sure does come around ... I am not saying that to be mean I just mean that things always go full circle and this proves it all the more People never change hon
ADF Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 I have been w/ my bf for 3 years. We've talked about marriage and looked at rings. We're in the process of buying a condo now. I know he loves me and I love him. Backstory: He cheated on his girlfriend at the time w/ me at the tail-end of their relationship. They had a rocky relationship the entire time and took several breaks. After they broke up, we dated for a year before I moved to a new city and 4 months later, he followed. We have lived together for 2 years now. This week: I snooped into his email, yes yes, despicable, and found an email between him and the ex-girlfriend (who has had the same boyfriend for 2+ years). The email detailed their plans to go away for a weekend together for no-strings-attached fun. SO...He hasn't cheated, yet. I snooped in his email. I'm NOT going to tell him that I snooped. I hinted around to figure out whether there was anything wrong within the relationship and he said (as always) that he would never do anything to ruin our relationship. What to do???? How to confront? How to stop this train from crashing just yet? I find it hilarious that you have trust issues with your BF, so you snoop through his email. Clearly, neither one of you is trustworthy or has any sense of respect for other people's boundries. You both need to grow up.
EmmaLou Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 I find it hilarious that you have trust issues with your BF, so you snoop through his email. Clearly, neither one of you is trustworthy or has any sense of respect for other people's boundries. You both need to grow up. If she hadn't snooped, she would never know about this... she's already questioned her boyfriend and he isn't giving anything away. She obviously had her doubts and this is the only way to find the real truth. It's so much better than having the blinders on, and being with someone for years who is lying to you!
ADF Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 If she hadn't snooped, she would never know about this... she's already questioned her boyfriend and he isn't giving anything away. She obviously had her doubts and this is the only way to find the real truth. It's so much better than having the blinders on, and being with someone for years who is lying to you! I disagree. Failure to respect another person's privacy is the ultimate form of affront. It will almost always poison a relationship, no matter how justified the snooper feels. Unfortunately, we now have raised a whole generation of young people who have no expectation or even understanding of privacy. They have grown up with random drug tests, random locker searches, and guilty-until-proven-innocent zero tolerance policies. They've basically been trained their whole lives to be prisoners, not citizens. This poster should have done exactly what she did originally--question him. When he couldn't give a convincing answer, she should have dumped him. That's the way to both protect yourself and respect the other person's rights.
A O Posted November 11, 2009 Posted November 11, 2009 She obviously had her doubts and this is the only way to find the real truth. It's so much better than having the blinders on, and being with someone for years who is lying to you! Totally agree. And that aside, isn't EmmaLou H gorgeous for her age? She came to my country not long ago I do recall. .
EmmaLou Posted November 12, 2009 Posted November 12, 2009 Totally agree. And that aside, isn't EmmaLou H gorgeous for her age? She came to my country not long ago I do recall. . Who is EmmaLou H? I did a google search for her but couldn't find anything. I looove gorgeous women!
A O Posted November 12, 2009 Posted November 12, 2009 Who is EmmaLou H? I did a google search for her but couldn't find anything. I looove gorgeous women! Haha, sorry, I got the spelling wrong....I was referring to EmmyLou Harris, the country singer with whom both you name looks similar too, as does your avatar. .
VeveCakes Posted November 17, 2009 Posted November 17, 2009 Follow him and catch them in the act. Ask her boyfriend to come too. That way, NO ONE can deny it. Not him, you, her or her bf. Good luck.
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