Els Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 I swear, I am at the end of my tether. I feel NO tenderness from him, NO affection, nothing of the sort of good times that we used to share. He's perpetually in a bad mood. I've been trying to get used to it during the time before his finals (refer to my previous thread about how important said finals is - basically, his entire career and future practically rests on it), because I realize the necessity of supporting him through it. But now the finals are over. Okay, fine, there's results, which he's EXTREMELY worried about, and a final small test that he has to re-sit a week from now. Fine. I will wait this one week, but I swear, if things do not change AFTER that (assuming the results are good, of course, and don't screw his life over), I really don't think I can stay in this any longer. I guess I'm just really trying to convince myself that it's all just because of his depressing and stressful circumstances. I'm refusing to believe that this is how it's gonna be for the rest of time - because that's a sure death knoll to our relationship. I will wait one week, and I will keep trying to remind myself - this is the guy who spent 4000 dollars that he didn't really have, to spend two weeks with me. This is the guy who's stayed up nights helping me through difficult times in my life. This is the guy who's been so busy that he barely had time to talk to anyone outside of school... except me. This is the guy who remembered to send me the sweetest birthday present ever, even during his busiest time of the year. Thank you for listening to my rant. I feel a wee bit better now.
Ecosse Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 Give the semester to him... address your concerns after he is finished with his last test... Try to remember that its not always about you
boldjack Posted November 6, 2009 Posted November 6, 2009 Elswyth, you need to woman-up, and realize that this is THE most important thing in both your lives. From your description of him, he has always been there for you, even during hard times. And you are ready to bail, when things don't go your way? Stop being so selfish, and help him through these tough times. It's not easy or fun, but it will be rewarding in the future. Go ahead and rant, but you know that if the positions were reversed, he would be your rock, now you be his.:)
Author Els Posted November 6, 2009 Author Posted November 6, 2009 (edited) Give the semester to him... address your concerns after he is finished with his last test... Try to remember that its not always about you That's what I am doing. The last test doesn't require any studying, though. It's more a formality than anything else. The real ones (that involved him studying 10+ hours a day) are over with. Elswyth, you need to woman-up, and realize that this is THE most important thing in both your lives. From your description of him, he has always been there for you, even during hard times. And you are ready to bail, when things don't go your way? Stop being so selfish, and help him through these tough times. It's not easy or fun, but it will be rewarding in the future. Go ahead and rant, but you know that if the positions were reversed, he would be your rock, now you be his.:) Thank you for the insight, boldjack. Haven't really seen you posting much around this part of the forums. I have been trying to do so - but it's really difficult. It's been over a month of this already, and frankly, I am sick to death of it. It's come to the point when I barely even remember how he was like before. And a scary thought strikes me - what if it isn't really the situation that's the problem, but really him just changing? Him not bothering anymore because I'm committed to him now? I guess I thought that after being there for him in the month leading up to his finals, I could finally get some time with the guy whom I fell for in the first place. But seems like it isn't going to clear up til he gets his results. If it does. I sure hope it does... Also, to be honest, it hasn't been peaches for me during my tough times, either. Yes, he has stayed up helping me during times when I needed him (working on a big assignment that he could help me with). But there have also been times when he admitted that he was tired of listening to me 'complain', when I was really sick and seeking his comfort. I guess me complaining, to him, is as aggravating as his stony silence is to me. Edited November 6, 2009 by Elswyth
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