Jump to content

Is this flirting?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

Here's the abridged version of the story:

 

I was dumped two and a half years ago by the man I wanted to marry. Bad breakup, left me with zero self-esteem. Due to broken heart and lack of confidence, I've been totally single since then. The last thing I ever expected was for someone to flirt with me and for me to find him attractive, but lo and behold it happened. Well, at least the me finding him attractive part. I need help discerning if this is flirting.

 

He's a drummer, I'm a dancer, his band and my company sometimes perform together. I see him maybe every three or four months, didn't really know him that well. The other night after a performance we started talking and made each other laugh a lot. Here are the things that have transpired:

 

1. It was another dancer's birthday and I got a piece of cake before he did. I said, "You can share mine." Our hands touched beneath the plate and he didn't pull away.

 

2. We walked out together and hugged good night.

 

3. I found him on facebook and sent a friend request. He responded with, "It's always good to see you. I love how you smile so wide when you dance."

 

4. I told him I loved his drumming and had been wanting to learn to play. Asked him if he taught classes.

 

5. He responded and said he wasn't doing any group classes right now but he could give me lessons one-on-one and gave me his number.

 

So...can this be considered flirting? I'm so clueless about these things, plus my ex really f*cked with my head so guys make even less sense to me now than they did before!!

  • Author
Posted

So we scheduled a "lesson" for Monday and he both said to each other that we were excited about it. I was a bit taken aback that he told me how much he charged; I thought we were just hanging out. I told him I didn't have that much money and he said, "It doesn't matter, just come over, we'll figure it out when you get here."

 

That night I wrote him a funny message about my alternate life skills in lieu of payment (one of which is that I give a mean massage.) Went on about how I could make him a sock monkey hat, etc. He wrote back and said, "You just cracked my ass up. We definitely have some stuff to talk about at the lesson."

 

A male friend says he's definitely flirting, and that the first message he sent me about how he liked that I smiled when I danced was obvious flirting and I should have just asked him out for coffee. I don't know how to do this boy-girl stuff anymore! It's been 2.5 years since I've had anything even resembling a date. I could use some guidance on this one, especially from guys!!

Posted

Sounds like flirting to me! Good luck with the date!

Posted

Good to see you back Sedge !!! You sound a lot better too !

 

Don't know if this guy is flirting or not. I think you will find out one way or another on monday night ! If he charges you ANYTHING, no he isn't.

 

Either way, it's a good sign that you at least CAN be attracted to someone new !

  • Author
Posted (edited)
If he charges you ANYTHING, no he isn't.

 

So since he already told me his rate, does that mean I should give it up? I don't want to make a fool of myself, especially since I have to see him around.

 

It does feel amazing to have a crush on someone else though!!! :)

Edited by sedgwick
Posted

Not a guy, but he's definitely flirting.

 

However, he may not know how YOU feel about him for sure, so he told you his rate just in case you don't have any interest in him otherwise. When you mentioned the massage and alternate forms of payment, he didn't bring up his rates again.

 

So yes, he likes you.

 

Just be cool until you have more to go on.

×
×
  • Create New...