rickigal Posted November 4, 2009 Posted November 4, 2009 Hi all. I am new here. My boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me out of the blue about 5 weeks ago. Everything was great (or so I thought). We met each other's children about a month prior to breaking up. He made such a big deal out of it saying how not just anyone meets his daughter and kept saying how serious we were, how much he loved me, told me how he bragged about what a great girlfriend he had. A week prior to breaking up with me he invited me to his parent's house for dinner. My birthday was 2 weeks prior to breaking up and he got me $150 spa certificate and wrote in my card how he wished he had the words to describe how happy he was I came into his life, that he was looking forward to celebrating many more occasions with me and signed it love always... I was totally shocked and blindsided when he broke up with me. He said he didn't see a future with me because he wanted more kids and that my financial situation would hinder that from happening anytime soon (I am divorced with a bit of debt). Anyway, since then he emailed me saying how he was a complete mess, missed me and called me the following week, begged for me back and asked me to come over. I didn't go over for fear it was an attempt to have his cake and eat it too. The next day he got all weird and wouldn't talk to me saying he regretted what he said but that he hoped that we could be friends. Since then I have made no attempt to call, email him or text him but i always remained on his AOL buddy list and Facebook as a friend. Just last week he removed me from both and I have been completely consumed by why. I can't stop thinking about why he would want to delete me and forget about me completely. I keep wondering if it is because he still loves me and can't bear to look at me or if it is because I mean nothing at all to him and maybe what I felt for him was more than he ever felt for me. I know it probably doesn't matter but I keep searching for the answers. I thought this was it in terms of finding "the one for me". I am completely broken up about it and I want to contact him to see how he is doing because I truly care about him as a person and a friend. I know that it is the wrong thing to do and that he will come back to me if it is meant to be but would it really be that much of a harm if I do email him? Am I reading too much into everything? How do I move on? I am hurting and thought this would get a lot easier more than a month afterward. I should add that we are both adults, he is 34 and I am 32. We both have children from previous relationships.
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