Jump to content

Etiquette when dating Eastern Block girls!!


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

Hi

I been dating an Eastern Block girl for over a fortnight & all has been going good, things in common, things like to do, intimacy etc!, but i seem to pay for everything!

 

Now i'm not being tight fisted & am old fashioned in a way that a guy takes a girl out etc, but in my past, everyone i dated have at least offered to pay occasionally, be it coffee's, cinema or a meal out! But this girl nothing! & i know if i bring it up, it could put the spanner in the works big time & be catastrophically offensive to her!

 

I have read where guys go to her country & pay for brides etc, girls that want to get outa the country & the guys, normally rich old men or desperate younger ones don't mind paying for a trophy or paying for love & affection, thats not my cuppa tea & isn't the situation here, or is it!

 

She's here with a Uni degree & getting a good job, but i don't want to think she's taking me for a ride by getting what she can & riding the wave whilst she can!

Maybe its the culture where a man pays for everything, i dunno & i'm stumped as to how to go about this delicate situation!

 

Any advice appreciated!

 

cg

Posted

It may have NOTHING to do with the fact that she is from an eastern bloc country. She might just be traditional/old fashioned. I am also like this, and I generally seem to end up with the kind of guy that feels the same: the guys pays most of the time. My boyfriend doesnt like it when I pay for anything, actually...I do now and then though.

 

What country does she come from? Eastern bloc covers a huge range of nationalities and geographical regions, etc...so I don't think there is one dating strategy that you can apply.

  • Author
Posted

Russia. I've googled it a lot & it seems the culture! Like the next few days i'm busy & can't get to ticket office for an event! She said she will pay & i can refund her the money!

I mean should i go with it a while & then if it gets heavier it may change!

 

I don't mind except i'm not flush of late & she told me this earlier about the tickets & i'm holding back on replying as i don't know whether to mention anything! aghh

Posted

Be honest with her...you both might just have different expectations.

 

Again...Russia is a very big place - you can't apply one cultural dating rule to a girl from Russia. Most girls I know like going dutch and I don't, but we're all from the same culture.

 

It all depends on how she says these things, how serious you are about eachother, etc....how long have you been dating, are you exclusive, etc?

  • Author
Posted

Well we've had 4 dates & are kinda physically close & we like each other, but we only met 2 weeks ago!

 

She just never offers & most girls i been with feel like its patronising to be payed for all the time, like they aren't capable of earning money or something!

 

Ok, i mentioned it & she said 'well shall i pay then', to make me feel bad & that cultures arent so different & its about circumstances & can be discussed!

 

I kinda feel bad now, but i'm not wealthy!, on the contrary!

 

I just read where a guy wanted to meet a girl in Ukraine & she bled him dry, paid for everything she wanted!

Posted
Russia. I've googled it a lot & it seems the culture! Like the next few days i'm busy & can't get to ticket office for an event! She said she will pay & i can refund her the money!

I mean should i go with it a while & then if it gets heavier it may change!

 

I don't mind except i'm not flush of late & she told me this earlier about the tickets & i'm holding back on replying as i don't know whether to mention anything! aghh

In Russia itself, the guy usually pays, as many women still don't work and if they do, there's a pretty significant wage disparity compared to men. As far as Russian girls living in the West (and I've dated quite a few of them), it varies. Some of them have been absolutely insistent on paying for themselves, some were like your girl and have never even bothered to offer to pay, and some expected me to pay in the beginning and started splitting the bill after the first couple of dates. So there's no general rule.

 

From my experience, girls who don't even offer to pay are usually to be avoided (regardless of their ethnicity) unless you don't mind being a sugar daddy.

Posted

I'm Polish and I pay my own way. I think it depends more on personality and how someone was raised rather than where they were raised.

Posted

What does an incredibly bad example of a Ukranian girl bleeding a guy dry have to do with your Russian girlfriend? I don't really like how you are viewing her - like 'all Eastern bloc girls' are the same, or something. It sounds like you're dealing in stereotypes. Just get to know her...you've only been on 4 dates, as well, and personally I'd still be expecting the guy to pay after 4 dates. Not saying that's right or wrong - it is just what I am used to, and maybe she has the same attitude as me. Also, not being mean, but if she is a golddigger it's likely that she'd be going after a rich guy and you said that you already have some cash flow issues...

Posted (edited)

"Eastern bloc" girls? Considering the wide range of languages, countries, economic conditions (? an increasing number of single "eastern bloc" girls weren't born during communism so that term is a bit outdated), I find that term sort of funny. I never thought of myself as an "eastern bloc" girl.

 

Here's an easy tip. If she can go to university in another country (and pay international student fees which is easily $15-30k/year), you don't need to worry aboutthe preying mail order brides or vampires "sucking you dry".

 

So she's more traditional. No problem. If you don't like that, date another girl.

Edited by bean1
edit
Posted

Actually I'd be careful about the generalizations you make when you talk to her about her country, culture, etc, as if she saw your comments on this thread, she might not be too keen on you anymore!

Posted
Actually I'd be careful about the generalizations you make when you talk to her about her country, culture, etc, as if she saw your comments on this thread, she might not be too keen on you anymore!

 

I would agree with this as well. You'd be suprised how quickly us "eastern bloc" girls get tired of hearing about mail order brides, cultural traditions, vodka, communism and plowing the fields (although my DH still thinks this is cute).

  • Author
Posted

I am not generalising, we talk a lot about this & the way some people buy brides etc & all you say!

 

I just asked her about her attitude towards paying for things as you start where you mean to go on & i didn't wanna be taken for a ride as some are!

 

She knows about the stigma & there is one & there are girls who want more from that area, so they want to marry western guys, don't say it don't happen, cos it does,the same with Thailand, but not all as you say & i never said all girls from that part of the world, but more so in certain places!

×
×
  • Create New...