Bulldozed Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 My ex and I split 2 mths ago. She left me so she could hook up with her "former" good friends recently divorced ex-hus. The wife left him for a reason. I've heard from a reliable source that he may have cheated and she found someone else, and basically split on a new family through a recent adoption. He was so pissed she racked up his credit card bills and the guy never got an attorney to represent him. Something tells me, he's not the innocent victim in all of this. My ex never had a chance to hear her friends side of the story as the one time she came to see my ex after their separation back in the spring, she offended her by jokingly commenting if it was ok that she dated her ex, since they were now separated. I've also heard that since she split on him back in the spring, he's played up the "poor me, my left me and my son" card at work, and has hooked up with more than one woman during this time. My ex and I used to go out with these two for dinner now and again. For some reason my ex has always been drawn to losers. Her first two marriages lasted less than our two years together. I was the first "well-adjusted", normal, well educated guy who has ever come into her life, and we've been friends for nearly 15 yrs, prior to dating. I treated her with respect and only asked for the same in return. Why does she put herself in these damaging relationships? My question is how long before she realizes what a complete loser this guy is and his mask comes off. I know it's impossible to tell, I'm just dreading the holidays alone. For 23-24 month together, we were solid. I'm trying like hell to move on, but I am so incredibly confused and hurt by all of this. Never in a million years did I expect her to pull something like this, especially since we were talking marriage, and her moving in before the holidays. Hatred/Love are such powerful emotions, separated by a finest line.
Space Ritual Posted November 7, 2009 Posted November 7, 2009 Some women are attracted to "bad boys" and all the drama that ensues with it. Sadly nice, stable guys are just that....NICE GUYS. And as much as we'd like to believe that the Nice guys finish last addage is an old wives tale, many times it isnt. She was married twice and they both lasted in total less than 2 years? Wow thats a pretty good indicator that this woman is a "fly by nighter". So sorry that you gave your love and affection to her. This woman obviously likes drama and stability is a foreign concept to her. I sure hope you impose NC and don't even worry about how she is. I know you loved her, but her past(you were friends with her for all those years?) should have told you this is somebody that was not worth your time. Maybe you thought you could fix her or just show her what a loving relationship is like. Sadly it wasn't the case. She will have to learn these lessons on her own.At any rate...DO NOT TAKE HER BACK!
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