cutieh Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 It seems as if most of my friends I end up having to break up with because they treat me bad. I dont understand why most of them treat me this way. I feel all alone. I recently moved to a knew city and met a new friend and she is so controlling and doesnt want to be my friend anymore just because I dont agree with her. Should I just be happy to be lonely or do I need to do somthing else to gain friends. But I feel most of my past friends treat me bad and I dont want that type of friendship. But it always leads me to being alone with hardly any friends. What u think?
Pedigree Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 I think you need to be more assertive. I don't know your exact circumstances or anything but I've had a friend who for all intents and purposes started to evolve into a bully when I was 14. Why? Because when he did something I didn't like, I either took his crap or treat it as a joke (when it's not). Chances are your "friends" sees you as not standing for yourself so they took advantage of you.
Meaplus3 Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 It seems as if most of my friends I end up having to break up with because they treat me bad. I dont understand why most of them treat me this way. I feel all alone. I recently moved to a knew city and met a new friend and she is so controlling and doesnt want to be my friend anymore just because I dont agree with her. Should I just be happy to be lonely or do I need to do somthing else to gain friends. But I feel most of my past friends treat me bad and I dont want that type of friendship. But it always leads me to being alone with hardly any friends. What u think? Well it sounds to me like for some reason you just might attract controlling friends. Do you feel like your freidns take advantage of you? Mea:)
bluestraps Posted November 3, 2009 Posted November 3, 2009 (edited) So far nothing to help you. I guess !! let me tell you a disturbing story. I am about in my late 30's . I had a group of friends we had so much fun togther. About 8 of us. 7 guys,... one girl . A few of these 8 friends i do not mention because they moved to different states and dont know any of this. Try to follow me.............From 1990 until about 2000, I had this group of friends. I always felt I was a little above them in inteligence and the way I acted. And to be frank they were kind of below my class of people. But I was just 19 and 20 yrs old and I didnt think about that stuff. Yet we were friends, and I never told them I felt this way. The first indication i was headed for disaster was my first real incidence with a friend showing their true self it was when this friend had actualy cheated with my girlfriend in 2000 , Hence the false friend !!! So once this was revealed, he basicaly went away. And he was out of the loop anyway because he tried the same thing unsucessfully with my other friends girlfriend. Another friend from this group, Who I will name "MR. BIG" ( My friend) maried another friend (the woman) from the group. They got divorced and droped out of site. The guy from this mariage was really my friend . The woman I did'nt like. In fact most of the group of friends did'nt like her , she was wierd. I regulary saw this guy friend, MR BIG. We were true friends, went to concerts togther, hung out, ECT....My other good friend from this group . We'll name him George. George met a girl they went out for a while... 2 years. They had a kid They got married. Now, the original group of friends from the begining disolved . That was fine with me , .... it ran its course. Now my friend, George, his wife ,Me, and my girlfriend became a new group of just the four of us . My friend George and the wife had two more kids. We would always see each other during weekends. We would have diner togther, go out togther. Birthday parties ect,Really like a tight friendship. Now fast forward to 2008 and early 09. The friend George and his wife were having problems. My friend started having physical and mental problems . Things got worse. My friend changed, his personality and such. SHe wasnt happy, he wasnt happy. They decided to split. It basicaly kind of split us between me and my friend and my girlfriend and my friends wife. I kind of did'nt see the lines being drawn. In the meanwhile, throughout 2005 to now the friend from earlier in the story, who I called "MR BIG" and I , and my girlfriend became friendly. This is the twist in the story. Just talking about problems not having friends. I will keep it contained within this area. My girlfriend and "MR BIG" became closer. Which I had no problem with because I trusted him . BUT WAS I WRONG.</p> Just like a bomb droping on my head and exploding. I get a call from my girlfriend saying that, she and my Friend " MR BIG" had spent the night togther. Yes thats right . She cheated on me and now they were togther. So now just about the only friend I have left and my girlfriend both deceived me and treated me like a peice of trash. So All the friends I had from this group except for one have some how showed their true colors. Relationships be it friendships or couples can fall prey to even inside influences that are quite destructive. So if you try to make friends and you feel the people have character flaws And they dont want to be your friends. Dont let it get you down. You may be glad because in the future they may cause you even more trouble. How do you make friends. Do not try to be something you are not. Always try to become friends with thoes who are most like you. I'ts so hard to find people that you can trust and you can get along with . Maybe what you need is too join some groups depending on what your interests are. You will find in the working world that you have to get along with even the people who are less than ideal . There are some really nasty people out there. I would be satisfied with one quality friend than 20 who are just no goodThere was one person in my past who didnt want to be friends because he thought my long hair meant I was drug addict. and isnt that stupid. Actualy to show that you can find good friends. During all this other stuff, I had two good friends who were nothing like the ones from my story. This story can only maybe make you feel beter about your situation. Not that i'ts a solution Please mention how old you are and a little about your personality. So others can better respond to your thread. Edited November 3, 2009 by bluestraps
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