Pleiades Moonstar's Planetary Guide to Internet Cheating

[drillman]

wow i thought i had problems with my wife abusing the net and not letting me see what she does on her computer. i did a search on internet cheating and found this story. suddenly my plight doesnt seem as bad;

 

I met Mr. Moonstar and we began a romance online.

At first he said he was a "juice chef" at a resort. I discovered that he was actually stuck at a cult, bowing to some woman who was claiming to be god. Pleiades told me that he wanted to leave that strange group, and pursue his abilities as a masseur.

He was unable to find work in his craft, so I supported him financially for two years...then he found out he was due some unemployment benefits, and he lived on that for awhile.

Pleiades commented that he shouldn't have to work. He said that he had better ideas, and ways to make money...but that never happened. He's a dreamer. He was also quite romantic and poetic...and had worked internet dating to death, looking for his ideal woman...(women who would also be able to support him, I suspect.) Many of these past lovers were indexed into a large black book - they were all "just friends".

Some of them he'd left broken-hearted, and they seemed to thrive on his occasional phone calls. It appeared that he had chosen to have relationships with females that had low self-esteem. I did not approve of these "hangers-on". I said he could have any female friend that he'd not had sex with as a contact. We went through his phone book. Most were sexual relationships. He claimed that several of them were platonic, in order to maintain the connection and continue the contact. This came to light later, when he was going to introduce one of these platonic old 'friends" to me, and she got jealous and refused to meet me. He finally admitted that they'd had a sexual relationship and said; "I HAD to be untruthful to you..."

 

He was offended when I asked what he was doing, exactly, on his computer - this came from my discovering a personals ad he had posted that was ACTIVE...and some surreptitious x-rated sites. (Many of his internet comments about me being intrusive stem from my computer searches to find out what he was doing behind my back.) When I confronted my husband about his ACTIVE personals ad, he said he was "Just curious" about who would respond.

Great. He was kind of like a personals ad addict.

 

After 3 years he finally got a job, and I thought things would get better...instead, he became a sudden control freak - he had a few bucks, and was suddenly going to call the shots. ( I guess he'd felt impotent for too long, with me supporting him...) His quote; "I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do from now on, and you'll just have to deal with it."

 

And ; "I've just been pretending to get along with you to have a place to stay..."

 

I dealt with it quite nicely, I think. I threw his butt out.

I don't need to be with someone who is using me for a place to stay.

 

As it turns out, honor can be sacrificed for one's need to survive....he showed me this many times.

 

The man can be charming and poetic when he needs to be...pretty much self-serving the rest of the time, with an under-current of the grandiose.*

Suffice it to say that this rolling stone/player felt "confined" by trying to live up to what I thought was simple consideration and honesty towards a mate in a relationship.

[drillman]

How to Stop Cheating on the Internet

 

Are you an internet cheater - cheating husband, cheating wife, or cheating boyfriend / girlfriend - that is trying hard to be faithful? Have you promised your mate that you would stop looking at porn, but you still do? The internet has a powerful lure. Here are tips to help you reduce some of the temptations of cheating the web can present you with.

 

1) Admit to yourself that your internet use is causing problems in your relationship because of the infidelity issues.

 

2) Have a purpose when you go online. Don't sign on because you are bored, lonely or had an argument with your spouse.

 

3) Keep your computer in an open location. Do not go online when you are alone.

 

4) Remove any Instant Messenger or chat programs. Change your email address.

 

5) Agree to install PC monitoring or filtering software so your spouse - wife, husband, boyfriend, or girlfriend - can regain trust and you have proof that you are not cheating while online.

 

6) Spend more time with your spouse, family and friends. Enjoy real life activities that that take you away from the computer. Go for walks, go out for dinner, exercise, shopping, see a movie.

 

If you are sincere about changing the way you use the internet, try these steps. Your husband / wife or boyfriend / girlfriend is sure to notice and it is a good way to start rebuilding trust in a relationship damages by internet infidelity.

[Mary3]

You may think unplugging the computer will end the cheating.....

 

But it won't. Its just the newest avenue for cheaters.

 

They will go other places to do the deed. Don't forget that.