Ideas For Moving Forward

[Beebie]

Right, I've had a really bad day today. Got up this morning thinking I'm going to do something productive to make myself feel better. I don't know why but throughout the day I've slowly sunk to a level where I just couldn't be bothered doing anything. Maybe it's the tiredness I feel because of all the emotional stress, I don't know.

 

My family live out of town and I don't have any friends close by to meet up with. I haven't spoken to anyone face to face today and I feel so down on myself.

 

So, my question is what do you do when you feel this dysfunctional and you've no-one to meet up with? I don't want to wallow in self pity, but it's hard to motivate yourself when you're alone and feeling bad. Any ideas anyone?

 

PS: I do have a gym membership but I can only go Mon-Fri.

[PWSX3]

rearrange the furniture in your house, or just the bedroom.

 

Fix something that you have been putting off.

 

Go for a walk.

[trippi1432]

Starting next weekend, I'm going to be repainting the interior of my house. My problem right now is trying to pick my colors....lol.

 

If anyone has any ideas they would like to share, please feel free! I'm going for warm and cozy for the Master Bedroom and a Tuscany feel for the rest of the house.

 

Currently, most of the house is a medium yellow and the MB is light purple (same as Master Bath)....I wake up in the mornings now thinking it all looks like flipping Easter M&M's. LMAO!!!

[dazedandconfused2008]

lol @ trippi. M&Ms...mmmm...making me want some now. Those colors sound so wonderful....what a great project. I wish i was there to give you a hand...i love painting.

 

What a great idea PWSX3 of rearranging furniture. It doesnt cost anything and its physical activity...and it keeps you busy trying to figure out where goes where. I like that "new" feeling.

 

For myself i signed up for a workshop titled finding out who your spiritual advisors are. (http://www.andnow.ca) Ive only been to one class so far but it was fun and i got to find out a couple of new things about myself. I also signed up for "finding your passion" which is a one evening workshop next month. Just go out in your community and try out new stuff and new things. Maybe you will find out its not for you but i find one thing leads to another. One encounter can open the door to other doors.

 

I dont know your particular situation but there are a lot of support groups out there (LS is a great online one) where you can vent and be around people that relate to you.

 

Volunteer. There are tons of places that need help and knowing we are doing something good for others make us feel good about ourselves.

 

If right now you dont feel like going out into the world yet (and thats ok)....what i find that helps me if DECLUTTERING my home, my car, any of my spaces. Start small...because going big can look and be overwhelming. Start with a drawer...completely empty it out....wash it...go through the stuff and only keep what you REALLY need to keep. Even if thats all you do for that day. Ive read and heard and have done myself is that the process of decluttering (also known as purging) is done for "cleansing" purposes...meaning its good for the soul. It gets rid of the old to make room for the new. Our external and internal environment are reflections of each other. When we feel crappy inside...it shows in our home. When our home gets real dirty and messy and out of control...it makes us feel that way inside. Like who wants to come home and relax and feel good when the house is a tornado and smells like old diapers?? Oh wait...im talking about my place now. Key here is START SMALL.

 

You know why these things work...because your doing it for YOU. Thats what moving on is...

[FeelingLonely98]

Starting next weekend, I'm going to be repainting the interior of my house. My problem right now is trying to pick my colors....lol.

If anyone has any ideas they would like to share, please feel free! I'm going for warm and cozy for the Master Bedroom and a Tuscany feel for the rest of the house.

Currently, most of the house is a medium yellow and the MB is light purple (same as Master Bath)....I wake up in the mornings now thinking it all looks like flipping Easter M&M's. LMAO!!!

 

In the last month or so, I've decide the "clean up" and redecorate my home. We moved everything out of the kitchen, family room, and dining room. cleaned every nook and cranny. Funny where cob webs, dust, dirt, hides... It's like the dirty mess in my M that was hiding from me! Couldn't see either one. I want a "CLEAN START" all around!

Anyway, I'm also repainting each room. Did plenty of caulking where necessary. From eggshell white to a soft "coffee cream" color. Much nicer. The long hallway is now a light brick / rust color (hard to describe).

 

When I finish all THIS type of stuff my sisters will go with me to buy new decorative items. I want to get rid of the more frilly (best word for me to describe it) style that my STBXW had. I never minded it because Iwas so in love with her, I didn't care. Just wanted her to be happy in her home.

 

We are planning to have Thanksgiving dinner here!

 

Anyways Beebie - Ya gotta find things to do - if you don't have anyone to hang out with - then do something that will make you smile and bring YOU satisfaction.

 

GOOD LUCK!

[FeelingLonely98]

lol @ trippi. M&Ms...mmmm...making me want some now. Those colors sound so wonderful....what a great project. I wish i was there to give you a hand...i love painting.

 

Sign me up to help too Beebie! just pay me in M&Ms. Yummy.

 

For myself i signed up for a workshop titled finding out who your spiritual advisors are. (www.andnow.ca) Ive only been to one class so far but it was fun and i got to find out a couple of new things about myself. I also signed up for "finding your passion" which is a one evening workshop next month. Just go out in your community and try out new stuff and new things. Maybe you will find out its not for you but i find one thing leads to another. One encounter can open the door to other doors.

 

d&c - can you tell us how you found out about this workshop? Could help others (like me!) figure out where these type of things are.

I really believe in that "try things and one thing will lead to another" statement. Good advice!

 

Myself - I am this weekend attending a church retreat for men. Hope to learn a little about myself, cleanse my soul, make some friends, help others, ...

 

Volunteer. There are tons of places that need help and knowing we are doing something good for others make us feel good about ourselves.

 

Again, how does one go about finding things to volunteer in? Sounds stupid But I'm not sure where to begin on this one. Are there any good websites?

 

If right now you dont feel like going out into the world yet (and thats ok)....what i find that helps me if DECLUTTERING my home, my car, any of my spaces. Start small...because going big can look and be overwhelming. Start with a drawer...completely empty it out....wash it...go through the stuff and only keep what you REALLY need to keep. Even if thats all you do for that day. Ive read and heard and have done myself is that the process of decluttering (also known as purging) is done for "cleansing" purposes...meaning its good for the soul. It gets rid of the old to make room for the new. Our external and internal environment are reflections of each other. When we feel crappy inside...it shows in our home. When our home gets real dirty and messy and out of control...it makes us feel that way inside. Like who wants to come home and relax and feel good when the house is a tornado and smells like old diapers?? Oh wait...im talking about my place now. Key here is START SMALL.

 

I've been doing this for years. When I'm in a funk, I will look at something and attack it. When I'm done I now that WOW, that is now clean, neat, decluttered. What an awesome feeling it was to throw away two bags of cr*p from my office. Or donate four large bags of clothes to the needy.

 

You know why these things work...because your doing it for YOU. Thats what moving on is...

 

Even when you do something for others you are still doing it for YOU.

Good Luck Beebie.

 

PEACE!

[PWSX3]

Starting next weekend, I'm going to be repainting the interior of my house. My problem right now is trying to pick my colors....lol.

 

If anyone has any ideas they would like to share, please feel free! I'm going for warm and cozy for the Master Bedroom and a Tuscany feel for the rest of the house.

 

Currently, most of the house is a medium yellow and the MB is light purple (same as Master Bath)....I wake up in the mornings now thinking it all looks like flipping Easter M&M's. LMAO!!!

One of the gals in one of my classes said; take your favorite outfit & look at the colors in it. Most people wear what they like....

 

For me, I would say you already have the right color, PURPLE!!!!!

Yes that is my favorite color......

[Beebie]

Thanks for the ideas everyone. I've had a much better time the last couple of days. Decided to drive 'home' to my family on Sunday night. They've been great. I went to the cemetery to visit my dad's grave and I always 'talk' to him when I'm there. He would be so sad at the state of my life, but I know exactly what he would say if he were here and I drew great inspiration just from being there.

 

It's my Aunt's birthday on Thursday and last night I wrote her birthday card. It felt SO WEIRD writing just my own name. It almost felt like H had died.

 

Anyway, I've decided that this week I'm going to look at things I can get involved with because I think the key to healing is being around people but at the same time helping others. Maybe I could get involved in fund raising. Just need a little confidence. I've also got in touch with an old schoolfriend who just happens to be in the same boat as me right now. Things might be looking up!

[FeelingLonely98]

Thanks for the ideas everyone. I've had a much better time the last couple of days. Decided to drive 'home' to my family on Sunday night. They've been great. I went to the cemetery to visit my dad's grave and I always 'talk' to him when I'm there. He would be so sad at the state of my life, but I know exactly what he would say if he were here and I drew great inspiration just from being there.

 

It's my Aunt's birthday on Thursday and last night I wrote her birthday card. It felt SO WEIRD writing just my own name. It almost felt like H had died.

 

Anyway, I've decided that this week I'm going to look at things I can get involved with because I think the key to healing is being around people but at the same time helping others. Maybe I could get involved in fund raising. Just need a little confidence. I've also got in touch with an old schoolfriend who just happens to be in the same boat as me right now. Things might be looking up!

 

Beebie - Let me know if you find something to get involved in. I am wanting to get involved in some type of volunteering and I'm looking for ideas. PM me if you don't want to take space on this thread. TY!!!

 

Your words about your Dad and your Aunt made me feel emotional! It made ME feel good that your Dad spoke to you and inspired you. TY so much for sharing those special moments with us. Glad you are better these last few days.