garyboy1 Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 hello everyone. lets get straight into it i feel stupid that i have to open up to people for an answer but i would like for you to help me if you could thank you and god bless you all ok i am 18 years old i have been with my girlfriend just around 3 years now we have been through thick and thin together we were a perfect couple untill 2-3 months into our relationship i cheated i kissed a girl at a party i know it is wrong and from that day i promised her i would never cheat again because i realy did hurt this girl so our realationship was going so well i mean we couldnt stop calling , texting , and touching each other we just loved each others company so much then the bad things started to happen in her family with her dad being unwell i stuck by her and her dad pulled through so that was very good news then she cheated on me with a guy from her work place it broke my heart i mean i was sobbing infront of her i know pathetic but anyways i forgave her because i had done it to her so i got it back and i knew how it felt so we moved on things were good again then one nyt i called her when she was drunk at a friends house and it was all silent then i haird her kissing while i was on the phone speaking and i said what the hell you are with another guy and she said shut up then she put him on the phone i was like wtf is going on so i put my clothes on and i got a taxi to were she was at and the guy had ran away i was angry at her we were argueing then she went home i went home and cryed my eyes out again like a total moron so after that the next morning i forgave her again then i took very ill i had cancer she seemed like the old girlfriend i had very close to me and stuff but i knew it was only out of guilt or feeling sorry for me but i didnt care i went through my (op) i pulled through and i got the all clear then after that like 2 months later it went back to normal i had lost my job and i was still down from what i had went trough and i have been very depressed and i havnt had a job for like 5 months now and shes constantly on my case about getting a job and i know its because im not treating her like old times i just dont have the cash right now but anyways she got this job and i hardly see her she doesnt want to cuddle or kiss me she just wants to chill out as she says i dont know but if i remember straight she was the one that loved cuddles,kisses and sex dont get me wrong we still have sex but she seems as if she doesnt love me no more my friend keeps telling me to get rid of her shes to hard on me and she thinks that she is better than me and its the truth i had cancer i got the all clear then my uncle died with cancer so its like a whole load of sh*t is going wrong just now and after my uncle died even though i wasnt so close to him she said aww thats so sad are you ok i replyed yea babe then shes says ( you didnt realy know him anyway did you ) << i mean come on wtf is that.... i do love this girl but shes pushing me away and to be honest i think shes cheating again she bought new clothes today and there was a guys number in her cell said its her old friend from work so i asked her to delete the number and she did but i just dont know if she is or not and right this very second she is in town partying sending me txts saying how are you so i txt back ( im fine you ) she calls me from a differnt number i dont answer so later on around 2:30am i call both numbers and the cells are switched off her mum and dad are going cazy at her for being out this late i just dont know what to do i dont want to walk away but if its the best thing then maybe i should i love this girl with all my heart im just getting very tierd of sitting in my room crying i mean i go to parties there is lots of girls that would get with me im not being big headed but its true and im the one that says NO! now i dont know what to do help me please thank you. god bless you all p.s sorry everyone my typeing isnt very well hopfully you can uderstand it thank you.
Space Ritual Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Well given your health and that you have recently had surgery, the last thing you need is all this drama. And being the fact you have cheated on her in the past and its happened to you at least once... Frankly speaking, I suggest you move on and concentrate on a full recovery before you jump into any relationships. Sounds like you have a bit of a wild one for a GF and I don't think this relationship is going anywhere but in the crapper. You don't need any more drama, and more drama is all you are gonna get. Listen being young is hard, having surgery is hard enough. don't let a situation like this hinder a long healthy life. Nothing and no one is ever worth that.
Author garyboy1 Posted October 31, 2009 Author Posted October 31, 2009 thank you for your comment it kinda hits home i am thinking to myself should i walk or stay and stick it out 1 more time i dont know tho anyone els know what i should do?? thanks
Space Ritual Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Really Gary. I think you should move on. This isnt worth it. You are so young and have so much to live for. I know it hurts like hell. we always tend to think in absolutes when we are young, as in: "I'll never meet anyone like her/him again" "I'll be alone..etc. No you wont. Not at all. These are just stumbling blocks on the road of romance. everyone has em. It's not like you were gonna ask her to marry you was it? Let me tell you something. I'm almost 45 years old. Been through some terrible crap in relationships in my life. As a matter of fact I have been chested on for whatever reason in just about every relationship Ive been in. I was cheated on 3 weeks before I was supposed to get married. Walked in on em screwing in my bed. That one really messed with me. Took me nearly 20 years to be able to be in what I considered a fairly stable relationship. In that interim I was just into casual one night stands and FWB situations. Then I found again what I thought could and would be the one... Guess what...almost the same damn thing happened. This time I didn't get to catch em in the act, but damned near. But this last time Instead of moaning and bitching about it I just kicked her to the curb, and through all the repeated pleas for forgiveness on her part and the age old script. I didnt look back. That act of hers was as Fresh as a Foghat Concert I have had some real bad experiences, but I'll never give up. As a matter of fact, in relationships the term "experiences" loosely translates into screw ups. What I'm trying to say I guess is that this girl is not the end all be all. There will be many more in your young life. I thought when the first cheat happened at 23 that my life was over. It was only put on hold. And even though I git cheated on eventually again I admit that even at my age there is always a lesson or twelve that can be learned. This female is simply not for you. But that does not mean she will be the only one to ever come down the pike. You'll find one that will love you and be faithful. I promise they are out there. Hell I'm still searching fo rthat one, but at least I'm still searching. Chin Up Gary...pick yourself up, dust yourself off and go forth. The next chapter of your life is waiting for you around the corner...go meet it!
imagine Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 You are at the age where hearts break easy and girls like to experiment. Grow up a bit. DO NOT think that you are a failure. Learn from the experience and remember the pain in your heart. Do not forget it.
Author garyboy1 Posted November 1, 2009 Author Posted November 1, 2009 thank you so much for ure time and yes im going to try sort this out with her tonight im sick of it now i realy do need to move and thanks so much Space Ritual / imagine use guys have helped me out so much take care and god bless u and ure loved ones
Blindsidedagainalive Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 Hi Gary! Sorry for the difficult times you have been going through. Repeating another posters feelings, you are both very young. Yes you will meet other woman. They too MAY potentially cheat on you. I am a 45 year old man. I have been cheated on in my teens, 20's 30's and 40's. Each time, I thought it would never happen again, and that I could not survive it. BUT, I did. And, there are lessons in all of the pain we suffer. What is the lesson for you if any? Look at your relationship very deeply, then look at yourself. You will find a lessen. Perhaps the lesson is simply not to put ALL of your trust into one person. Now, you have to trust yourself. Let this be a catalyst to make yourself a better, not bitter man.
Untouchable_Fire Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 I am a 45 year old man. I have been cheated on in my teens, 20's 30's and 40's. Your doing something wrong! I've never really had a woman cheat on me (that I know of). Maybe your picking the wrong ones.
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