LovelyDaze Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 No joke. What the hell he felt introducing us would do, I don't know. It's like another setback for me. I was very nice and kind to her as she was to me. She actually lives over 1500 miles away and will return to her home state Monday morning. But as soon as she returns, he will be calling and texting me again. This has happened before after he visited her. I know I need to reinstate NC to get over him but it's stunts like this that make it difficult. My best friend feels he is just loving the drama of it all. I sure as hell don't. I just want to get over him and have a relationship with a great guy who actually cares.
LostInLA Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 What the F! That is NOT cool...sorry I don't know your story...but...yah NC ASAP!
Author LovelyDaze Posted October 31, 2009 Author Posted October 31, 2009 Thank you soooo much! This is the ex I have mentioned in another post that broke up with me to date this girl long distance. THEN comes around to say that it won't last and that he wants me to "wait" for him when their relationship is over. My ex is BEYOND demented yet I still have lingering feeling for him. WON'T take him back, I promise. But I still hurt and mourn the man I thought he was.
twinklecat Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Man that's horrible! Why do they play these games?! I agree and try and initiate complete nc straight away, sounds like he is just messing with you and you don't need that!
Author LovelyDaze Posted October 31, 2009 Author Posted October 31, 2009 Thanks Twinklecat and Jagged Road. It's like he is some sort of torturer and he enjoys doing things to put me thru pain. I'm sure his new girlfriend would be shocked to know how horribly he has talked about her to me and worse, how he says he doesn't see a future with her but sees one with me! He is beyond unbelievable. What is sad is that he seemed like a such a great guy when I was with him and has turned into a person I don't even know.
twinklecat Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 I really don't know why or how people could do things like that, I never could. It's kinda how I feel about my ex at the moment, don't know who he is and starting to think he doesn't know either! I really would think it would be best for you to just cut him out of your life. I admire you for being so nice to her, I don't think I could do the same!
garyboy1 Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 What a complete douche. this guy is messing with ure head thinks its kool to mess with you and his so called girlfriend hes trying the player act but hes doing it all wrong what you need to do is say ( i can do better ) good bye up top ^ doushe bag!
Space Ritual Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 No joke. What the hell he felt introducing us would do, I don't know. It's like another setback for me. I was very nice and kind to her as she was to me. She actually lives over 1500 miles away and will return to her home state Monday morning. But as soon as she returns, he will be calling and texting me again. This has happened before after he visited her. I know I need to reinstate NC to get over him but it's stunts like this that make it difficult. My best friend feels he is just loving the drama of it all. I sure as hell don't. I just want to get over him and have a relationship with a great guy who actually cares. This guy is a *****tard...the only contact you should have is kicking him in the balls and laughing at him...thats if he really has any..lol
LostInLA Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 (edited) But I still hurt and mourn the man I thought he was. I think this is the problem, which is probably quite common. Before my recent ex, I dated a guy who I thought was ideal but in reality, he is not. He's just a guy. But I compared every guy to him and couldn't get over him (haha so I moved away...ya...I was young). Realizing that you sometimes idealize people to be someone they are not can help put things into perspective. Also, if he's talking smack about her...he's probably talking smack about you. ICK! Get away from him, you deserve RESPECT! Edited October 31, 2009 by LostInLA
fofiffs Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Like I said on you last post, your ex is a moron and a complete DOUCHE BAG!!! NC is the way to go..stay strong..
mickleb Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 I know I need to reinstate NC to get over him but it's stunts like this that make it difficult.QUOTE] I don't understand this bit, hon. Surely, it's stunts like this that make it CLEAR why you should be going NC?! If he ever tries to do something like that again, you apologise to the girl and say: I'm really sorry you're being dragged into this but I have told (his name) to never contact me again and so I'm going to have to be rude and close the door in your face. Then you say to him: Don't EVER darken my door again and try not to drag innocent girls like this poor creature into your head games. I'll get a restraining order on you if you can't accept a simple instruction. Good bye. PLEASE don't consider waiting for this scumbag. Join the new NC club and get on with your healing. Do NOT let hurtful people back into your life time after time! Take care. x
Author LovelyDaze Posted November 1, 2009 Author Posted November 1, 2009 Oh you guys are awesome! I want that so much. Just for him to stop with the game playing/drama and go to hell. After his new GF leaves he is visiting his parents in Virginia until mid-week. That'l give me a real break from any stupid ex shenanigans.
AliveAndKicking Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 After his new GF leaves he is visiting his parents in Virginia until mid-week. That'l give me a real break from any stupid ex shenanigans. It doesn't matter where he is, she is, or where anyone else is. It ONLY matters where YOU are and what YOU will allow. There can only be shenanigans if you allow it. It is up to you to protect yourself from this jackass. All ettiquette, manners, and just plain decency went out the window the second he abused you emotionally as he did. Yes- call it what it is: Abuse. Don't answer the phone, don't open the door, block him from contacting you in any way, shape, or form. Don't worry about apperances. You have every RIGHT to disallow abusive cruel cretins from entering YOUR world. You deserve better and it up to YOU to enforce good behavior in your world. You CAN do it. You have got what it takes. You are strong and brave. Take charge of your world in regards to this clown today. Right now. DO it! :-)
carhill Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 OP, remember, when you do meet a good man, this will tug at the back of your mind. There will be a few battles to fight within yourself. Hopefully, you'll have won most of them before you meet him. Continued success with your NC, starting now
Thornton Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 I would normally have said that he probably didn't realise it would be so hard on you because he's completely over the relationship and expects you to be too. However the fact that he is still calling and texting you suggests that he may have been using this other girl to make you feel jealous. Is he trying to persuade you to get back together with him? I suggest you avoid all contact with him and look for a healthier relationship with someone else. He has a new gf now, so at least you know that your relationship with him is definitely over, and you can focus on looking forward to something better. Good luck
Author LovelyDaze Posted November 2, 2009 Author Posted November 2, 2009 You all just make me smile! I will practice NC like I am on my job. I KNOW he is the biggest jerk to hurt me and to use his new GF to awaken my green-eyed monster. I just want the "having feelings for him" part to leave me entirely.
LostInLA Posted November 2, 2009 Posted November 2, 2009 Well then keep up the NC and those feelings will eventually diminish! It takes time, but if he keeps coming around it will take so much longer!
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