FeelingLonely98 Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 When a BS finds a new love should they EVER let the new love know about their LS posting / thread history? Or is that something that should never be brought up? AND, here is a twist on the same question --> If they were to ever reconcile with the X should they EVER let the previous X know about their LS posting / thread history? I know what I think but will reserve comment until you all comment... PEACE!
trippi1432 Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 In my opinon, no.....it's water under the bridge and needs to stay there.
Author FeelingLonely98 Posted October 31, 2009 Author Posted October 31, 2009 In my opinon, no.....it's water under the bridge and needs to stay there. Hmmm, ok , I still won't post my opinion until I read several other posts!!
Barby Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 IMHO I would say no on both cases....this is a place you come to vent, get advice, ect....I mean I don't see the point in letting the person read your most intimate thoughts it could leave you vulnerable. Again just MHO:)
hopesndreams Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 I wouldn't. Only those who have been through or are still experiencing the anguish and desperation would really understand what I have written and where I was coming from. It's becoming part of my past now anyway. I have learned from it and am moving on but will stick around to help others.
Author FeelingLonely98 Posted October 31, 2009 Author Posted October 31, 2009 I wouldn't. Only those who have been through or are still experiencing the anguish and desperation would really understand what I have written and where I was coming from. It's becoming part of my past now anyway. I have learned from it and am moving on but will stick around to help others. COOL - Once I "move on" I also plan to come back here to help others - i.e., "pay it forward"!!!
Barby Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Yes I agree it's part of one's "past" and if with the "X" why dig up old issues and open old wounds....and if it's with the new love then for sure why bring them into your past issues and open up what they might perceive as your defects or deep emotional issues (ie with the X) and could cause them to be scared away or fearful of becoming involved thinking you couldn't get over the X and may still be dealing with those same issues/feelings you posted about....
Author FeelingLonely98 Posted October 31, 2009 Author Posted October 31, 2009 Yes I agree it's part of one's "past" and if with the "X" why dig up old issues and open old wounds....and if it's with the new love then for sure why bring them into your past issues and open up what they might perceive as your defects or deep emotional issues (ie with the X) and could cause them to be scared away or fearful of becoming involved thinking you couldn't get over the X and may still be dealing with those same issues/feelings you posted about.... Well, I agree with NOT sharing LS with new partners or even your X should you reconcile. However, I thought that if they did stumble upon LS and saw a thread that they knew was you then it could be like you're hiding it. Not a reason to bring it out though. I've told my sisters and Mom I found an online community support group but didn't even tell them it was LS. Didn't want them to read all the details. This is mostly anonymous you know. PEACE!
imagine Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Marriage should always be about honesty. You find your own situation as a lack of XWW being honest. I believe that looking up a woman now for physical recovery is cheating her. You need friends right now and a chance to grieve over your wife. Were you to reconnect with XWW you STILL need to be honest. I think that it is not improper to tell her of LS once recovery is PROPERLY established. And there are many improper recoveries.
tojaz Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 (edited) Well, I agree with NOT sharing LS with new partners or even your X should you reconcile. However, I thought that if they did stumble upon LS and saw a thread that they knew was you then it could be like you're hiding it. Not a reason to bring it out though. I've told my sisters and Mom I found an online community support group but didn't even tell them it was LS. Didn't want them to read all the details. This is mostly anonymous you know. PEACE! FL, I have always looked at LS kind of like a therapy session. It's private and just for me when i start a thread or share my details with others. I would keep it private. Further evidence, early on my ex stumbled upon me on LS and read my posts. She didn't get it anyways and felt the people here where all manipulative in what they said !! WTF! You never know how someone is going to take what is written here and that is why its annonymous. I'd keep it that way. TOJAZ Edited October 31, 2009 by tojaz
Author FeelingLonely98 Posted October 31, 2009 Author Posted October 31, 2009 FL, I have always looked at LS kind of like a therapy session. It's private and just for me when i start a thread or share my details with others. I would keep it private. Further evidence, early on my ex stumbled upon me on LS and read my posts. She didn't get it anyways and felt the people here where all manipulative in what they said !! WTF! You never know how someone is going to take what is written here and that is why its annonymous. I'd keep it that way. TOJAZ I agree - see bold. PEACE!
HarmonyHope Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 I don't think there's any need to do that. You don't have to share everything with any partner, just be honest about what you do choose to share.
Navin_R_Johnson Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 Just a note that loveshack seems to be fully indexed by google. Some sites, like divorcebusting forums, are not. For what it's worth.
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