hopeful1980 Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 So most of you know I have really wanted affection from my husband, but he's not the most affectionate man. Well, this morning my 2 year old wakes up screaming at 5am. Hubby doesn't get off from work until 1am, so he is obviously beat. Then the 3 year old wakes up and wants a peanut butter and jelly sandwich at 5:15. They are both screaming and crying and trying to get me out of bed and I just snapped. I couldn't take it and I hid under the covers. So I tell the kids to go back into their room until at least 6:30 and they go away screaming and stomping. I was at the end of my rope. So I nudge DH and say, "Honey, I can't. I just can't do it right now." Prior to this journey I would have snapped at him to help me deal with the kids. But I skipped past my frustration and allowed myself to be vulnerable with him because in all honestly I was just exhausted and felt like I couldn't do another thing. He did the most unexpected thing. We were both still lying in bed and he grabbed me and pulled me close to him and held me. He kissed my forehead and said, "It's going to be alright Babe." It was exactly what I needed EXACTLY when I needed it. At that moment I felt so safe and loved, I couldn't even hear the kids crying anymore. What I thought I needed was for him to get the kids straightened out, but what I really needed is what he gave me. I really needed his support in a way that said, "I love you." It's the best feeling I've felt in years. It's the reason why I married him, but I had forgotten what it felt like until this morning. I think that is progress.
Malenfant Posted October 30, 2009 Posted October 30, 2009 thats lovely. its those small little moments that mean so much. not the big gestures. good for you
aerogurl87 Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Aww that's so sweet Hope things continue to get better and better for you two
mem11363 Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 Glad your man is really connecting with you So most of you know I have really wanted affection from my husband, but he's not the most affectionate man. Well, this morning my 2 year old wakes up screaming at 5am. Hubby doesn't get off from work until 1am, so he is obviously beat. Then the 3 year old wakes up and wants a peanut butter and jelly sandwich at 5:15. They are both screaming and crying and trying to get me out of bed and I just snapped. I couldn't take it and I hid under the covers. So I tell the kids to go back into their room until at least 6:30 and they go away screaming and stomping. I was at the end of my rope. So I nudge DH and say, "Honey, I can't. I just can't do it right now." Prior to this journey I would have snapped at him to help me deal with the kids. But I skipped past my frustration and allowed myself to be vulnerable with him because in all honestly I was just exhausted and felt like I couldn't do another thing. He did the most unexpected thing. We were both still lying in bed and he grabbed me and pulled me close to him and held me. He kissed my forehead and said, "It's going to be alright Babe." It was exactly what I needed EXACTLY when I needed it. At that moment I felt so safe and loved, I couldn't even hear the kids crying anymore. What I thought I needed was for him to get the kids straightened out, but what I really needed is what he gave me. I really needed his support in a way that said, "I love you." It's the best feeling I've felt in years. It's the reason why I married him, but I had forgotten what it felt like until this morning. I think that is progress.
JaneInVegas Posted October 31, 2009 Posted October 31, 2009 awww ... that is so sweet, thanks for sharing such a positive story
Lovelybird Posted November 1, 2009 Posted November 1, 2009 That's nice. Love and connection is about like that maybe. You feel like you are naked with all the vulnerabilities, waiting for someone to show their heart to connect with you, or judge you. You are totally powerless, and you give the power to another. maybe a brave one can really taste connection and love
pappabear Posted November 12, 2009 Posted November 12, 2009 That's a very sweet story. It's great when a husband or wife can do something like that for the other. I've always wondered why sometimes we treat each other badly. We shouldn't do that to the people who have stood beside us and loved us. Let's all try to do better...like the story that started this thread.
Ronni_W Posted November 12, 2009 Posted November 12, 2009 hopeful, that is TOO cool! I'm very happy for you. If I may suggest, if you haven't already, to share with your hubby how significant that was, and the wonderful impact it had on you -- I think sometimes they really don't know, so when we get the chance, we can express our gratitude and give a little lesson at the same time. Wishing you both much more of the same
Author hopeful1980 Posted November 12, 2009 Author Posted November 12, 2009 hopeful, that is TOO cool! I'm very happy for you. If I may suggest, if you haven't already, to share with your hubby how significant that was, and the wonderful impact it had on you -- I think sometimes they really don't know, so when we get the chance, we can express our gratitude and give a little lesson at the same time. Wishing you both much more of the same Oh, I did. I texted him as soon as I got to work that day and told him how much I appreciated it. He replied that he was happy he could be there for me.
Recommended Posts